Fertility Network UK
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12dp5det,test day,BFN😢

Hi every one,

Today is 12days after my ET and was my test day and it’s BFN😢💔 I had brown discharges since day8 but it wasn’t too much as I put sanitary pads and they stayed clean all these days it’s just when I go to toilet and wipe myself. I had a very sore boobs but since day 8 it back to normal, I did early tests since day 9 and all was negative. I’m so heart broken and disappointed💔 don’t know what to do my mind and my body both are in shock. Crying since morning and thinking there are lots of people that they really don’t deserve the baby,they alcoholic, smoke and using drugs all their life and they get peregnant easily and then treats the poor baby like sh*t because they didn’t want it and I tried my best to get just one and I couldn’t, it’s not fair at all. I’ll call my clinic tomorrow to inform them. lost my hope completely don’t know how some women are that stronge when they have miscarriage, bless them, wish I was 😔xxx

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Aw Anna I am absolutely gutted for you, I’m so sorry it hasn’t worked. I was really rooting for you. Try to take good care of yourself at this difficult time. When you’re feeling a bit stronger, go back for your review appointment to discuss your cycle and hopefully they’ll be able to give you some suggestions for your next step. Sending you love and hugs 😘 xx

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Thanks Dunla, I’m devastated wasn’t expect that,every thing went well from the first even my nurse and dr were very happy and now this is the result,I’m in shock.hope ur ok xx

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BFN are devastating, this can be such a cruel process. It is going to take time for you to get through this but you will. Be kind to yourself, allow yourself time to grieve. Thinking of you, D xx

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It’s so very cruel and we can’t do anything about it. Defiantly takes a time for me to back to normal person I was,I feel that I lots myself. Thanks for your support lovely xxx

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❤️❤️❤️

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😘❤️

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So sorry Anna. Your experience has reminded me of mine. I also felt period cramps before the test and started spotting before the test. Remember, that it isn’t uncommon to fail first cycle, but it doesn’t mean it would never work. They can now review how your cycle went and change few things to get a better outcome next time. Did they manage to freeze any embryos? Be kind to yourself today, I know it is hard but you will be ok. X

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Thanks Kari, I just don’t know how I can do another cycle don’t feel I’m stronge enough to get another fail. I only have one blastocyst freeze and the one failed was blast as well. I really hope I feel better soon,I’m like when I see a baby in a pram I can cry😢🤦🏻‍♀️ xx

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Anna, I know it is heartbreaking. Give yourself some time until you feel ready again. It is good news that you have one frozen. Look after yourself xx

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Thanks for your support lovely. Yes defo need a good time to back to normal and start it again xxx

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Oh Anna, I'm so sorry. I really had hope for you that it would work. Know it's so difficult to see past today, but please try to take it easy today and plan something nice. You are so right, life is so unfair and all of us who would be amazing parents and I hate seeing people treat their children awful (we've all had those thoughts more than once). They really don't know how lucky they are. I hope you're feeling better soon. It's good to cry it out, and get all your emotions out. Much love ❤️❤️

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Thanks Lilli, to be honest I had hope for myself too,everything went really good from the first all my tests scans everything was good but it looks like my body killed my little bean😔 My period was due few days a go a still nothing it’s so confusing and sad at the moment. Time will heal it xxx

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Hi there, I’m so sorry to read this ☹️ It sure is an emotional journey. Go easy on yourself, it will get easier as each day passes. When you’re feeling stronger, you can think about next steps. Sending you big hugs 💕 xx

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Thanks Lou, I’ll try my best to stay strong xxx

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Ohhh dear..I m so sorry..absolutely devastated to read this😢😢I was so hoping a BFP for you...Nevertheless,easier said than done pls keep strong...we all will get there and keep fighting...sending you positive vibes...will keep you in prayers xx 🙇🙇

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Thanks Niki, I was hoping for a BFP too but wasn’t my time. Hopefully in few days I can think better to decide what to do xxx

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So sorry to hear this. Look after yourself xx

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Thanks xx

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I’m so sorry.

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Thanks xx

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So sorry to hear this 😭 BFN are so cruel, big hugs xx

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😢thanks, yeah it’s so cruel xx

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So sorry to read this!! BFN’s really are so cruel!! Take time to look after yourself!! 😢xx

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Thanks Leo xxx

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So sorry to hear your news hunny, it’s heartbreaking, take care of yourself x x

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Thanks lovely yes it’s heartbreaking xx

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I'm sooooo gutted to read this lovely, was really rooting for you, big hugs hun, take time out for yourself. Grieve do nice things then when your ready make a plan, bless you. I'm so sorry 💗💗🤗😘😘

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Thanks Cat, I had a goof felling for my self too but obviously I was wrong. Only time can heal it.to be honest I admire you,do know how you are so strong bless you. I’ll can the clinic tomorrow to see what’s their advice. Hope you’re ok 💕😘xxx

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Your right times a great healer, your strong too you just don't know it lovely those that have known me for little longer than you, know I take my hat off to you ivf warriors that is some immense strength hun trust me, I don't have that strength. So thanks hun but I admire you. Big hugs lovely 💗🤗😘

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💕😘xxx

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so sorry to hear. this is such a difficult journey.

take it easy over the next few days & be kind to yourself.

sending love & light ✨💕✨💕

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Thanks lovely 💕xx

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Really sorry to hear this lovely. Be nice to yourself and recoup. I know you don’t feel strong enough but you are and you will do this. You have got it. Lots of love xxx

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Thanks lovey, I think today is the worst day of my life,hopefully I feel better by tomorrow xxx

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Yes it will take some time. But you will pick yourself back up and you will carry on. And one day you will get those two lines. So sorry again and sending lots of love and hugs xxx

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Thanks lovely xxxx

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Awww I'm so sorry Anna, was really hoping for a good outcome for you. I had a DE failure back in November and we had incredibly good 5 day blastocysts. It's disappointing....never get used to seeing Bfns. Sending big hugs.xx

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Thanks lovely, bfn is a cruel. I was hoping for myself too but obviously I was wrong. xxx

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It’s really hard Anna and sadly most of us have been here too. That’s why we can tell you that you will get through this and pick yourself up and find the strength to come back fighting. Trust me. When you want something bad enough, which obviously you do, you won’t give up on the first hurdle 💪🏻 For now though be kind to yourself and allow yourself to be upset because it is upsetting xx

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Thanks Tugsgirl, you’re right I’m not the only one most of the girls in here been through more than one cycle and they still fighting, yeah it’s so upsetting only time can heal it.thanks for your support xxx

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You’re welcome. Take some time and then start fighting 💪🏻 xx

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💕xx

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Oh Anna I'm really sorry to read this. I was hoping it would be good news. Be kind to yourself today and allow yourself time to grieve! This whole journey is hard. You are stronger than you think Anna. Sending you lots of love and hugs ❤️ Xxxx

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Thanks lovely,to be honest at the moment I don’t feel I’m strong enough but I know I’ll be fine as most of the girls in here been trough this so they know better than me.thanks for your support xxxx

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Anna I’m so sorry and heartbroken for you. Take time for yourself, there is nothing any of us could have done differently. It will happen for you, we just have to remain positive. For now take time and grieve. Take care of yourself

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Thanks lovely,you’re right. it’s so sad and upsetting and I can’t do anything about it,I’ve done anything I could but it wasn’t my time. Thanks for your support xx

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I’m so sorry Anna, BFNs are so cruel! Take some time to rebuild your strength xx

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Thanks E,yeah it’s so cruel😢xx

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Sorry to hear this...I know how you feel..bfn are hard to deal with xxx

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Thanks hun, it’s so cruel we really don’t deserve it xxx

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So sorry that it didn't work this time. It's horribly cruel. Take good care of yourself xx

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Thanks JoJo,yeah is so very cruel we don’t deserve it. xx

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Awww hun.

I'm sorry. I prayed lots for you.

It will happen soon. Hang in there. Try and stay strong.

Stay positive xx

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Thanks Raz, it wasn’t my time and only time can heal my sadness. Hopefully next time when I feel strong enough xxx

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Sending big hugs to you Anna.

I’m so sorry this cycle didn’t work out for you. It’s the worst feeling in the world & I wish there was a crystal ball we could use to see what happens next.

My first cycle was a BFN too, unfortunately for some of us it just doesn’t work first time. Please don’t give up though - take some time off, let your mind settle and your body recover and then talk to the doctors to see what can be done differently. Just because this time didn’t work doesn’t mean it will always be a sad outcome 💕

Be strong. We are all here for you x

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Thanks Laura, bfn is so cruel and we don’t deserve that,but can’t do nothing about it. I think my mind and my body both are in shock at the moment,I wanted this so bad but obviously it wasn’t my time. Only time can heal it, I’ll fight for this again when I feel better. Thanks for your support lovely xxx

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So sorry Anna, I know how rubbish you must be feeling but in time you’ll feel ready again. Just give yourself time to heal. We somehow find the strength to carry on when we want something so badly xxx

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I feel worst than rubbish at the moment, every thing went well since we start our cycle and now I feel my body killed my little bean.its so cruel. When I feel a bit better I’ll fight for that again xxx

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I’m so sorry Anna and I cannot begin to understand what you are going through xx

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Thanks lovely xx

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I am so sorry to hear that Anna00. No words can explain how you feel. Please be strong. Allow yourself to cry if you need too. The goodnews is you have a blasto frozen. Look after yourself and when you are ready again see have ago. I am thinking about you. It’s not easy. May God Make you strong and take you through this. Much love x

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Thanks lovely, It’s so upsetting and unfortunately we can’t do anything about it,only time can heal it. I really hope my only blast one work next time it’s my only hope. Thanks for your support very kind of you xx

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Thinking of you and I said a little prayer for you. Take it easy.x

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That’s very nice of you thanks lovely xx

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Anna, jus seen this, im so very sorry!! Absolutely gutted for u! Your right - life is so unfair, pregnancy comes so easy to some people. You musy be so distressed. Sending lots of love, take care of yourself. 😘😘😘 xxx

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I’m dieing of sadness and can’t do anything about it😔 only time can heal it. Don’t get it why it’s negative I didn’t have my period, probably wasn’t my time. My mind and my body both are in shock and can’t decide what I should do next, think I should wait till I get better then start it all again. Hope you’re ok. Thanks for your support 😘xxx

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I'm sure you are 💔. It absolutely sucks and there's no words that will make u feel better im sure. But ur right time is a healer and when ur feeling stronger ul be ready to smash round 2.

I heard that progesterone can delay a period, not sure if that is true, read it on google before but Im sure ur clinic will be able to advise u. Do u have to work tomorrow? How is ur hubby? Xx

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Yeah I heard that about the progesterone but lots of girls in here had their period while they were using it,I’ll call the clinic tomorrow morning. No I’m off tomorrow and if I don’t feel well I’ll get Tuesday off as well,can deal with coustomers when I’m like this. DH is great to be honest he’s upset but trying his best to make me happy,offerd a good movie and dinner but I said no I wasn’t ready to go out and see lots of people with their babies😔hopefully tomorrow is a better day,thanks TTCs your so lovely,hope you feel better and every thing goes well for you xxx🤞🏻

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You're just right to take some time off to come to terms with this. You come first, work is work and will always be there. It's hard to hold yourself together in work when u just want to burst into tears. You sound like ur being well looked after by ur hubby, may u find the strength to get through this together 😘 xx

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Thanks lovely, yeah I think if get back to work I start crying again in front of every one and they don’t know anything, defo need some time to get out of my shock. He’s great honestly trying his best but nothing can make me happy at the moment I just need time to heal it. Thanks for your support 😘xxx

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So,so sorry to hear this. Take heart dear.

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Thanks Anoo xx

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So sorry 😢 xx

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Thanks lovely 😔xx

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So sorry to hear about this Anna 🙁 It's always so unfair, my older brother & wife have 3 kids and get pregnant with just trying 1month! It's always so painful when they announce or to be around with the kids.. love them, but hard!

After my 2nd bfn I saw a counsellor and she really helped! She said to take time to grieve at your own pace (at the time I didn't realize I was grieving) and take 1day at a time... and the pain will start wearing off in stages... and she was right 😊

I'm now on 6dp5dt so almost crossing another line again.

It's good to know your hubby is taking good care of you!

Go for your next Frostie as soon as you're ready ;)

Hang in there and don't rush this process, it's as important .

Take care xxx

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Thanks Tanger, I might need to see a counsellor as I’m still really upset I don’t know maybe because it was my first time that’s why it’s so hard for me to accept it,don’t know really or maybe it just me. I’m so scared to go back and try it again😔

Best of luck for you hope you get BFP this time🤞🏻 Thanks for your support xxx

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Oh Anna it's always so hard and sadly it doesn't get easier with each try 😕 But when you're ready, which you will be, I know it! What helped me were copping mechanisms and tools given by the counselour, this forum and the realisation that it's going to get better, not today but it will.

I really feel your pain and I'm so sorry you're feeling like this - no one should have to go through this but there are a lot of people here that really care for you xx

You're very strong 💪🏼 don't forget that and just give yourself some time now ❤

Xxx

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That’s so sweet of you thanks lovely xx

I really like that, ’it’s going to get better not today but it will’❤️ It gives me hope

I know I’m not the only one who’ve been trough this painful journey,I love every one in here we never met but we’re like a family with same problem,that’s why we understand each other well❤️

Thanks again for your support xxxx

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Big hugs lovely, look after yourself and cry when you need to 💕 xx

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Thanks lovely, Life so cruel and upsetting and unfair. Thanks for your support ❤️xx

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Oh Anna I’m so sorry to hear this I’ve been waiting to see how you got on. BFN are hard- look after yourself and when you are ready you will find the strength to go again xxx

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😢it’s so upsetting I’m completely heartbroken, I was really positive about it and now..., don’t know which part I did wrong. hope I find the strength soon life is so hard for me at the moment. Thanks for ur support lovely xxx

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You haven’t done anything wrong at all, please do not blame yourself. What you are feeling is expected. You need to take time for yourself to come to terms with the negative. You need to stay strong and Keep fighting 💪🏻 your dreams will come true xxx

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Yes only time can heal it,all these feelings are new for me maybe that’s why I react like this or maybe it’s normal don’t know. Hopefully I can get my strength back and start fighting for my dream xxx

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Hi Anna. I am pretty new here but I have found all your posts so helpful. So sorry to hear your news. I just wanted to say that I hope you are not blaming yourself at all. It is definitely not your fault or anything you have done. Nothing I can say can make you feel better but know that you are not alone. Do think about counselling. Sending you big hugs. Xx

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Hi lovely, glad my posts are healthful! I’m new this was my first cycle which I started in January. To be honest yes I blaming myself😔,I think about it all the time that my body killed my little bean,and it’s so upsetting. maybe it’s normal for this situation I don’t know. Yes I might do it but first I should speak with my dr,I called them this morning so waiting for them to call me back. Good luck to you and you can always message me if you need any help xxx

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aww so sorry to hear this anna xx

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Thanks lauren xx

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So sorry to hear this - was rooting for you xx Take time to grieve - it's heartbreaking, I know but you will come back stronger. I think most of the ladies on this forum have had at least 1 failed cycle - I've just finished my 3rd failed cycle!! - Take a few days, go for a follow up consultation & find out what they recommend to you xx

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Thanks lorraine, it’s it so cruel and heartbreaking.still in shock and upset. I don’t even know why this happened,hope they can tell me the reason. Omg you had 3rd failed cycle?! how are you?hope you’re ok. You’re so strong.thanks for your support xx

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Hey Anna00, how r u feeling today? 💞

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Hi lovely, I wasn't very good this morning and couldn’t sleep last night at all,called the clinic the nurse said they can give me a follow up app on March!15th of March😳 I was fuming told her I need to see the dr not because I want to do embryo transfer again as physically and mentally I’m not able to do it in next few months I just need a chat. So she said they might find a time for me!(can’t believe it).

Any way I tried to pull myself up,my period just started so I’m having fun in next few days😔 DH said we can go on a holiday if I like,so we might go. He said we can try it naturally again till I get ready for my next cycle. My mood is ups and down at the moment one min I cry next min I feel positive! Hopefully I can back to my normal life soon. Thanks for your message very nice of you as always. How are you? 😘xxx

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Ahh ive been thinking of u! Its going to be rough for a while for u! Suggestion of a holiday sounds like a lovely idea, u deserve some happy memories amongst all this sadness. Rubbish ur period has started but in some ways im sure u have been hanging around waiting for it.

My clinic gave me written information too on day of our transfer saying if it fails we get a follow up apt in 12 weeks. It seems very harsh and that ur just left hanging after such a big disappointment. Glad the clinic are going to try and get u a sooner apt. Do u have any more funded cycles? xx

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Yeah it’s very tough but there is nothing I can do,time will heal it as everyone said. Ah so yours is the same as mine,the nurse told me I need a month for all the drugs get out of my system maybe that’s why.but it’s harsh. To be honest I’m happy my period started! I had period cramps from 6 days ago so at least I’m going to be pain free soon. You’re so nice I really really hope it works for you this time🤞🏻xxx

I don’t know how many cycle I can get with NHS,is it one or two? X

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It does feel harsh, i totally empathise with you. Perhaps they can get u a sooner apt after all, fingers crossed! Ul be glad when that period is over! Treat urself to a glass of wine or whatever it is u fancy, u deserve it!!

Thank u for ur well wishes, im not feeling very positive, pretty much all symptoms have disappeared but i guess have to wait and see!

Think it depends where u live, some places only one, i only get one. That includes a frozen go, did u have any to freeze? We didnt get any unfortunately. But other places i think up to 3 rounds. ❤

Keep ur chin up, ur an ivf warrior 💞

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Be positive sometimes the symptoms disappear after implantation I read somewhere that said after day 8 you feel much more better,so hopefully your little bean is safe and comfy now.

I heard it depend on your age how many cycle you can get,under 30 2cycle and from 40 just 1,never hear it depend where you live! I’ll ask my dr next time.

We only have one blast frozen.

We all are warrior in here❤️

Be positive you’ll get your BFP I’m sure xxx

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Thanks Anna00!

Great news u have a blast frozen, it could be ur lucky little bean ❤ keep ur head up 😘 xx

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Hope my one and only little bean stay next time. Fingers crossed for you🤞🏻 It’s gonna be positive I’m sure 😘xx

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I’m so sorry to hear this. Sending wishes your way. You will be strong as you already have been to go through what you have already. Give yourself some time to process and ease back into thing. Sending hugs 🤗 your way xx

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Thanks lovely, I’m doing my best to pull myself up,it takes a time but hopefully I’ll be fine.thanks for your support😘 good luck xxx

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Thank you. Everyone is so supportive on here aren’t they. I’m just on my first cycle and on the menupur atm, so cant really advise any more besides sending you wishes. Hope they find an appointment sooner for you xx

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Thank you,hopefully you get a BFP on your first cycle. This one was my first so I’m new started in January. People are great in here love them. xx

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My follow up from my D and C at Christmas is on weds ... it’s been a long wait!! Go do lots of nice fun stuff for now whilst waiting 💕 xx

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Really! So it’s not just mine it’s every where! it’s so hard waiting that long but I guess there is no other choice. Yeah I’m going to treat myself to lots of nice things😊 after this painful period finish🤦🏻‍♀️ xxx

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Hi Anna! I m sorry for your loss. Nothing is worse than losing one of your own. This is something very hard to cope with, Cry as much as you can hon! let it all out. Or it will kill you from inside. I know you must be feeling like this is the end of the world. You won't ever be able to conceive again, but listen to me, there are many other ways to make your dream come through. Just don't lose hope and try to stay positive. I know it's very hard and difficult for you, but I will suggest you to try to conceive once again with IVF. In Vitro Fertilization is a very successful technique. Many mothers are achieving their dream with it, you can also be one of them. But even if you want that to succeed, then you have to take care of yourself, and eat healthily and exercise. Remove all junk food, oily things and fizzy drinks from your diet, they are harmful to you and your baby. Good Luck! Much Love!

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Thanks Lorrie, yeah it’s looks like and of the world for me and I know I’m gonna be ok again but hope it happens soon.my mood is still very ups and down so guess it takes some time. I normally eat healthy I always been like that,gym 3 4 times a week no fizzy drink no fast food. Thanks for your support xx

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I’m so sorry to hear this Anna. BFN are crushing. I hope you somehow manage to pick yourselves up and go again 💪🏻 xoxo

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Thanks jess.bfn is so cruel but nothing we can do about it,only time can heal it.hope you’re ok xxx

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Thanks lovely. Best of luck to you too xx

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Hi there.How are you? I am really sad to hear about your story. Don't worry you will get pregnant. Don't feel sad.If you are facing problem you can try IVF.Surrogacy is the best option. Please don't cry.Every one in this world have its own journey. Consult to a good doctor.Take care of your self.

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Thanks jenifer! Yeah it’s so very sab but nothing we can do about it. I don’t have fertility problem so I’ll try it naturally before I go for IVF again. And yes of course I know I’m not the only one. Good luck to you xx

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