Transfer cancelled

[baby2016]

As suspected transfer has been cancelled due to lining not shifting past 5.3mm. We have 2 good Frosties which I'm really please about as the last and only time I had Frosties was from by first cycle and so happy to know their banked safely away now.

Feeling completely ok with it being delayed as we've also gone away for a few days so least I can now fully enjoy the break. Got a follow up next week to see what they can do to help thicken my lining, I've had it to 9 before so hoping we can get there again.

My big dilemma is if when the time comes I push for both put back or so two separate transfers. My gut says put both back but I worry then if it's a bfn I'm back to square one! Any advice would be good xx

[Chloegreenkiwi]

Sorry to hear it was cancelled but glad you feel ok about it. As you say at least you’ve got some in the bank! Our consultant said they’d only want to put 2 back if they weren’t good quality. Then just as I was about to have transfer this am another consultant asked if we were having 2 yet they were both good quality! It’s a tough decision to make! My OH wasn’t there and I don’t think the best decisions can be made when you have no pants on! 😉. So I would say it’s dependent on the quality of your eggs but hopefully your consultant will give good advice too! And at least you have time to think about it!!

[baby2016 in reply to Chloegreenkiwi]

Aw thank you! And good luck on your 2ww 😊🤞 how many did you have transferred in the end? Xx

[Chloegreenkiwi in reply to baby2016]

I only had 1 put back. We were open to 2 and had discussed it before but had no warning they were going to suggest it yesterday and to be fair she didn’t even suggest it she just asked what we were doing. So far we’ve pretty much been told by the consultant what we’re doing so I was taken off guard. We have 3 left- 1 from 1st cycle so I think we’ll go 2 next time if we do round 5. Really hoping round 4 is the one though!! Good luck when the transfer comes. Let us know what you decide! X

[Hidden]

Sorry to hear it was cancelled, good news that you have 2 frosties waiting for your next attempt 😊.

Ive always had 2 put back but I've only ever had 2 day transfer and 3 day transfer and never any frosties . They really tried to put us off putting 2 back this time but I just feel it's totally right for us.

I think it's totally personal preference.

Xx

[baby2016 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you cocker! It's such a hard decision. I think our clinics policy is 1, but I know you can push for 2 if you want too. Good luck with the rest of your 2ww and hoping you get your bfp! Xx

[Hidden in reply to baby2016]

I think most clinics policys are 1 embro , I really dug my heals in with my clinic this time 🤣.

Good luck with whatever you decide, and thank you 😊 x

[Amanda86]

Sorry to hear it's been cancelled but good to see your feeling positive 🙂

No advice for 1 or 2, I've never had the option so don't know what I would choose. I'm sure the girls on here will be able to help you out though 🙂Xxx

[baby2016 in reply to Amanda86]

Thanks Amanda. I know it was the right decision all round so that's what makes it easier, would have been much harder if it was borderline but I still would of declined it then xx

[Cinderella5]

Hey, glad to see you've got some good news along with the not so good news but your post is positive so I think you're ok with it!! Great that you got 2 in the freezer but yes I guess it is a big decision going onwards. Does your clinic have any views on the one vs two? My clinic always advises two and they said that's based in their better success with a double transfer but need to be aware of the risk of multiple pregnancy and we could do either. I guess you need to consider whether you would be ok with a multiple pregnancy? Also I'm guessing that finances comes into it too presuming that you have to pay for frozen transfers?! Oooh it's a tougher. We've always gone with two if we have them but I guess it's down to you both!

Hopefully the clinic will have a plan B for lining next time round and it's not quite so much pressure when its a frozen round!!xx

[baby2016 in reply to Cinderella5]

Thanks Cinders! Policy is 1 I think but I know you can push for two. Cost isn't really a consideration as I'm part of a multicycle package that contains most of the drugs, it's more if this one doesn't work I have to then be matched with another Doner and go through another fresh cycle, just beginning to have enough of it all really but then don't won't my impatience to ruin it either.

I know so many people who have been successful with 2 and only 1 ended up with twins. Ideally I wanted 3 in the freezer as was going to try with 1 first and then if that didn't then go for double transfer so know as only have 2 unsure which way to go with it! Xx

[Cinderella5 in reply to baby2016]

I forgot you were doing a multicycle program, duh! This may sound daft but Im kind of looking at things with the view that the more BFN's, the more disheartened I will get so doing a double transfer in my head means damage limitation which of course means the prospect of another fresh cycle and of course we get charged for FETs so cheaper to do double transfer. I dont mind the thought of another fresh cycle (apart from the money involved) as of course dont have to do egg collection however the BFN's are getting hard to take so the less times I have to do the 2ww then the better but again that's just me and my reasoning might sound like Im off my head!! Ha ha ha Also like you I have heard of couple that have had success with double transfers.xx

[baby2016 in reply to Cinderella5]

I completely get your reasoning and that's the stage I'm beginning to get too! I know I'm going to swap and change over the next month or two and will be something I prob decide on the day 😬 are you going again in the new year? We'll prob end up being January buddies! 😊xx

[Cinderella5 in reply to baby2016]

Ha ha ha oh well at least I dont sound like a nutter yet then! Yes, Im sure you'll go back and forward with your decision but its good to sound it all out here, sometimes just helps to say it out loud so to speak!

It's looking like Im going for a hysteroscopy in Jan, too close to Christmas just now to do it and I need to get my smear up to date firstly, so unfortunately will be nearer March by the time I get started but needs must!!xx

[KittyK]

With us we always said if we went for an FET we would put two back. I had a miscarriage with our fresh cycle so when we had our FET we stuck with our decision and put two back. We chose this for two reasons really a) because we'd tried everything else so it just felt like we had to try something different to feel like we were giving it a chance. It just felt right. B) we couldn't afford to keep doing the cycles and we only had so much money left so we wanted to put two back to try and increase our chances. I know some experts say that you don't double your chances by putting two back but it worked for us and even though we lost one of our twins we got a little girl in the end so I don't regret it. It's weird though, I wonder, if we'd only put one back, would we still have lost one baby and therefore ended up with no baby? Or was it because we put two back that one of them failed to thrive? Never know I guess. Specialist said there was no way to tell although the position of the lost baby suggested it was the first embryo they put in that failed to thrive. It's a tough decision. Me and my husband made a list of pros and cons before we chose xxxx

Good luck my dear and enjoy your few days off xxx

[baby2016 in reply to KittyK]

Thanks Kitty. Your post echos what keeps going round my head! I always said if I ever got to get 2 blasts again I'd opt for double transfer as know so many it has worked for, you being one of them 😊 I'm sure it must increase the odds. My friend had 5 frozen, did 3 single transfers which resulted in 2x chemicals and 1x MMC, she then decided to transfer the last 2, of which we think both initially took due to how strong her tests were, they then really lightened for a couple of days but then started to get slowly darker. She now has a gorgeous 3 month old, and I know of plenty of others this has happened too. Twins scare me a little but at the same time it would be amazing to have 2, just very hard work for a few years. So many decisions!! I'm just scared if I don't do it, and either both transfers are bfn or chemicals, or if I transfer both and still the same result then I've got to start all over again! Xx

[Tugsgirl]

We have two frosties left but to be honest the thought of putting them both back terrifies me. What if it’s a bfn? What if I potentially lose them both when losing one is hard enough? The way I see it is two frosties is two chances for us. It’s game over for me and the OH once they’re gone so I can’t take that risk xx

[baby2016 in reply to Tugsgirl]

Thanks Tugs! I'm having the same battle in my head as to wether I'd jepodise losing them by putting two back, or jepodising my chances my not putting two back! It's so hard isn't it!

If I'd had 3 my plan was to do 1, then if that didn't work transfer the last 2. All my friends who have been successful with ivf transferred 2 and that's what really makes me think about it. I know of about 6 people who were all successful with two, all but one had had losses from chemicals to mmc's and now all have their bundles of joy with only one having twins. So to me that's what my big sway with it all is. All so hard isn't it!?! Xx

[Tugsgirl in reply to baby2016]

Yes. Every single part of it *sighs* xx

[baby2016 in reply to Tugsgirl]

Haha! This made me smile as is soooo true! Xx

[CheshireKit]

Sorry to hear it was cancelled but great news that there are two good frosties. When we met the consultant she said they advise single transfer to limit pregnancy complications and as we’d be using younger donor eggs rather than my old aged eggs! What does your consultant advise? Hope you enjoy a restful break xxx

[baby2016 in reply to CheshireKit]

Aw thanks CheshireKit! We have been advised 1 as like they've said to you it's a completely different ball game with younger eggs, but worried more if it's my body that rejects so by putting two back I wondering if that means it wouldn't be able to cope with fighting off two and one would survive if that makes any sense at all?! As I've been miscarrying for the last 4 years so surely all of them can't be egg related, but who knows! It's like the vast grey unknown! Are you thinking of going down this road now too? 😊xx

[Hidden]

its bloody disappointing when you are looking forward to something only to have it result in nothing!

[baby2016 in reply to Hidden]

Yeah this is the big worry isn't it?! Why does it all have to be this hard! X

[sanchia46]

I have that dilemma too. Had one embryo put in august and had a chemical pregnancy. I have three left and deciding whether to do a single or double transfer. I’m leaning towards single

[baby2016 in reply to sanchia46]

You have to do whatever's best for you. You could always do another single and then if needed (hopefully not) do a double one after that xx

[sanchia46 in reply to baby2016]

Yes that’s what I was thinking my dear. Love and luck to you x