Bfn... again! 😢

[sharpy87]

Morning,

Bfn this morning! It was expected as Iv been spotting since 5dp5dt!

First round was a problem with quantity (only 1 fertilised)

This round was more a problem of quality (6 fertilised but only 2 made it to early blast by day 5 and clinic said they weren't good quality) I had both put back, but nothing stuck.

Neither time gave we got anything to freeze!

Has anyone had this? What should we do next? We are self funding and all this 'trial and error' is draining us emotionally, physically and financially!

[Hidden]

Hi sharpy87. I was just strolling through the posts and yours was the first one that popped up and couldn't just read your post and not reply. I'm so so sorry to hear the sad news. I can't really relate to what you are going through but can imagine you are very upset right now, life is just unfair sometimes. Try and keep your chin up and stay strong (I know it's hard).

[DC13]

Can I just say how sorry I am to hear of your experiences to date and I certainly know how you must be feeling. I went through 6 rounds of ICSI with my own eggs, all negative and all rounds with no embryos to freeze.

We decided to go down the donor egg route following our experiences. This is something that you could do in the UK or abroad. The UK has longer waiting lists and the legal aspects are different whereas abroad you can move through quickly and they have a different legalities. This could be something for you to consider.

In my experience going through a donor cycle was so much easier on me and my body. We had our first ever positive pregnancy test following the fresh donor cycle but unfortunately I miscarried. We also had 5 frozen excellent quality blastocytes. We have gone through a FET but unfortunately negative and I am currently about to start another FET round.

The other options you could also consider are adoption. I believe that you need to be 6 months after your last IVF round before you can apply - this might be different in different regions however.

You could also look at surrogacy.

If you want more information on the donor egg route then please PM me. I would be happy to answer your questions on my experiences.

Wishing you success in whatever decision you make.

xx

[lorraineb61]

So sorry to hear that this morning. We're in exactly the same position as you although it was the other way round. 1st ICSI cycle - 3 eggs, all made it to Day 5 - 2 implanted (poor quality) didn't stick. Nothing to freeze. 2nd ICSI cycle - 1 egg which didn't fertilise.

We're also self funding & it is heart breaking. I've started DHEA in the hope that that improves the quality. We've gone with Access Fertility so we have another 2 shots before we have to decide on the next step.

Speak to your consultant & see if there is anything different that they would recommend.

But - first of all - take the time you need & look after yourself xx

[Hidden]

Hi

I had 19 eggs collected on my first round of ivf. Only one started to turn to blastocyst by day 5, had the 2 best embryos transferred but neither stuck. My clinic has advised that it was due to poor egg quality and have suggested I take DHEA and CoQ10 for at least 6 weeks prior to the next go.

Not sure if you have taken anything or are planning another go, but something to consider.

[Blondie_81]

Hi, firstly sending big hugs and lots of love your way I'm so very sorry. I know exactly what you're going through - our 1st ivf only resulted in 1 egg which didn't fertilise, 2nd round - 4 eggs and 2 fertilised (an 8 cell which was v good and a 4 cell good enough) put both back on day 3 but neither stuck... now on 3rd cycle EC due 18th.. So we've never been lucky enough to have any frozen either and this is our last funded cycle. We're in process of moving house too so things will be tight if need to go private for cycle 4 but hopefully 🙏🏻 fingers crossed it won't come to that... I know there's no words that can really help how you feel - my advice is just give yourself plenty of time to grieve and do lots of nice things to spoil yourselves and just let it all out and don't give a f*** about work or anything else xxx

[Blondie_81 in reply to Blondie_81]

Ps once things have settled go with your gut and what your heart tells you xx

[N_M_10]

So sorry to read this. Take care xx

[Ems83]

Sorry to hear this xx

[Amanda86]

So so sorry sharpy! 🙁 Xxx

[Leo2017]

Sorry to read this!! Look after yourself!! 😢xx

[Tugsgirl]

I'm sorry to hear of your bfn 😞 xx

[E_05]

So sorry to read this, BFN are just cruel xx

[Hidden]

Sorry to hear this, look after yourself xxx

[Penders]

Hi I'm so sorry to hear this. Look after yourself today, sending you lots of hugs xxx

[C_L_A_I_R_E]

Hi sharpy I'm so sorry to hear this. My first round of ivf was similar with lower grade day 5s. Once this failed I too wanted to look into egg quality. I read the book 'it starts with an egg' and followed the advice for more than 3 months before my 2nd ivf. I did have. Laparoscopy and a change of protocol before my 2nd round so that probably influenced it too but the book helped me feel more proactive and gave me guidance.

[Kelly-03]

So sorry to hear this x have you spoken to your clinic? X

[Cinderella5]

Im so sorry to hear this, I know how hard it can be! Ive had a few cycles and the most we got was 2 early blasts on cycle 2 and 1 good blast on cycle 3....none of them stuck! I always started bleeding 7dp5dt which is devastating. You can have a read of my previous posts, I wont bore you here. We just recently had a review and the consultant was quite blunt but kind that our chances of success are low (5%) due to my age....will be 40 in a few months. I did try taking DHEA which I do think helped the quality and perhaps slightly increased the numbers too. IVF is a massive lottery and it comes down to luck, we got told there was no reason why we shouldn't have gotten pregnant, we just didn't. With our rubbish odds and without an endless pot of money we have moved onto a donor egg cycle (which is not for everyone) in the hope that we can achieve a pregnancy this way.

Take some time out to grieve, IVF puts us under such a lot of physical and mental stress before you decide where to go next and perhaps arrange a little treat for going through all of this! Big hugs!xx

[Hannah_J]

Hugs to you, dear! It's heartbreaking news I share your pain, as I've had 5 IVF cycles, but all of them failed. We had three funded cycles, but the last two were on our own expense. But I don't really care about money. It's the pain, despair and stress that are the worst... So please try to spend some time with yourself and your husband, to live through it, to accept it and let it go. And consult with your Dr about meds and other ways to increase your chances. I'd advise you to find some funding programs and have two more cycles after a time. Please don't give up! There are ways to become a parent. I don't know about donor eggs, though there were ladies that advised this option, but I've started considering surrogacy with my own eggs. My point is that there's still a way out. And you are not alone. There will always be support for you here. And should you decide to consider surrogacy, welcome to my club

[Fredaflintstone]

So sorry to hear this Sharpy. Hope you're ok. It's so cruel and unfair. Sending you big hugs xxx