Alcohol advice: i wanted some advice... - Fertility Network UK

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Alcohol advice

vic77 profile image
vic77
โ€ข45 Replies

i wanted some advice and/or reassurance. I know so many women on here do so well with diet, fitness and no alcohol however I am one of these women that like to eat the odd cake or 2. I am classes as overweight on the stupid bmi but size 12 and I feel fit and healthy. Walk a lot and do yoga. I do however like a drink and feel guilty that like many women I have not stopped drinking months in advance of ivf. I definitely had a healthier cycle 2nd time round and still bfn so am left wondering all the time about lifestyle choices and trying to get balance between everything I enjoy food and alcohol wise in moderation while not becoming too obsessed and letting ivf take over. So my dilemma now is 3rd cycle about to begin and paying got it this time. I am currently at the airport waiting on a flight to Dublin to meet two of my best pals. I am so looking forward to this as right before my short protocol starts when my period is due..any day now. I would love to have a glass or 2 of wine and maybe even a pint of Guinness however don't want to be racked with guilt and maybe not enjoy it anyway. Does anyone have any advice? What have others done in this situation? I know that sometimes the psychological benefits of relaxing and having a drink with pals can far outweigh any negative side effects of the drink. Just feeling a bit fed up as I sit here as I wouldn't mind if I were pregnant but all this shit sometimes feels for nothing. Hope you are all well xxx๐Ÿท๐Ÿท๐Ÿท๐Ÿท๐Ÿท

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vic77
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Lucyloo81 profile image
Lucyloo81

Hey Vic77, everything in moderation I say. I have stopped caffeine, alcohol ate better bla bla bla and yet I'm away to start ivf AGAIN. I honestly think IVF is a lottery and it's stressful enough without adding to the pressures. So go enjoy your time with your mates.

Enjoy xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toLucyloo81

Thanks Mrs. .oh yes caffeine off menu too which sucks as loved going out for coffee too herbal tea just not the same ๐Ÿ˜‰good luck next time for you too xx

Asweetpea profile image
Asweetpea

I am so with you on this vic77. I am only just starting my journey and doing egg donation but finding it so hard to know what to take on board and what not too. There's so much advice out there, do this don't do that etc, but you still need to live. I am working on the everything in moderation theory. I've tried to cut down on the alcohol, (although july has been a bit mental, weddings, hen parties etc,) eat a healthy balanced diet and exercise regularly.

Hope you have a wonderful time away with your friends. Laughing and relaxing has surely got to be good for you and if that means a half of Guinness then go for it. Remember it's full of iron!!!!!

W ish you the best of luck.xxxx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toAsweetpea

Aww thanks and wishing you so much luck with egg donation. Currently scoffing lots of chocolate at airport instead of wine not sure what is worse ๐Ÿ˜ฏI think I just need to know I am not alone or being judged. I worry people may think I am not taking it seriously enough and if it another bfn I will blame the Guinness but yeah I heard that too that iron in guiness is actually good for you ๐Ÿ˜‰xxx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

Please please have a great time and enjoy a drink or two! If we weren't supposed to drink surely we would be advised not to? To be teetotal? In moderation I'm sure it will be fine ๐Ÿ˜Š xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toTugsgirl

Thanks hun your comments always mean a lot..how u doing?not long now xx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirlโ€ข in reply tovic77

Going a teeny weeny tiny bit crazy ๐Ÿ˜œ xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toTugsgirl

Lol know that feeling ๐Ÿ˜‰have a drink ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿท๐Ÿทxxx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirlโ€ข in reply tovic77

Always want a drink when I can't have one, when I can have one I can quite easily take it or leave it! xx

Oakey80 profile image
Oakey80

Hiya I was very relaxed with my diet and fitness when i started ivf and even in the months leading up to it (I'm more of a what will be, will be person) I had a few drinks every week right up to egg transfer....still got my bfp on my 2nd go (1st fet) Like you say it's just a lottery...as long as everything is in moderation then just go with it, live a little and have a great time with your friends.

xxx

MonkAK profile image
MonkAK

Hi there, I did everything by the book with my first fresh cycle, including giving up alcohol 3 months before and it ended in a chemical pregnancy. With my frozen cycle I didn't bother and continued to drink in moderation. We went on holiday to Menorca a couple of weeks before transfer and had a couple of glasses of cava every night (I even had a glass of red the night before transfer) and I am now 38 weeks pregnant and expecting to go into labour any moment! Admittedly, I didn't have to rely on producing healthy eggs as it was an FET and not a fresh cycle, so I probably would have drunk less had that not been the case, but I was told by my consultant that my emotional/mental health was just as important as my physical health and that, if a couple of drinks every now and then helped to me to relax and de-stress, then to go for it and not give myself a hard time. I don't think that a glass or two of wine and a pint of Guinness with your friends over one weekend is going to ruin your chances. In fact, I think that a relaxing, fun weekend of unwinding just before starting your treatment will be just what you need. And if a little bit of alcohol helps you to do that, then go for it! Enjoy! Xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toMonkAK

Wow that's great. So many huge congrats to you how exciting. Your consultant sounds ace think I am going to claim they are my consultant this weekend xx

MonkAK profile image
MonkAKโ€ข in reply tovic77

Ha! Yes, she was a big believer that being relaxed and happy was just as important as being physically and medically ready for treatment - she even advised us to delay our FET for a month to go on holiday! It worked for us so I'm now a staunch believer too. Feel free to claim her as your own! X

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toMonkAK

Thanks I will just for the weekend ๐Ÿ˜‰we delayed our treatment this time too and took a holiday..problem is I still want to feel like I am on holiday...lol..take care xx

vic77 profile image
vic77

Congrats on bfp Oakey80 that's great..all you lovely ladies are making me feel better for sure..think I will let myself be this weekend. .not drink like I did in my 20s but the odd vino or guinessential surely won't hurt as not even started injections yet๐Ÿ˜Šgot that to look forward to next week.to be honest the thought of all that again making me want a drink ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿท๐Ÿทxx

It's so hard to know what the right thing is to do and I think you have to allow yourself some treats. I'm sure the odd glass every now and then wont hurt. Enjoy your holiday I'm sure its the best thing you can do for yourself before treatment and best of luck xxx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply to

Thanks Mrs xxx

Lou9 profile image
Lou9

Hello! I posted a similar question last week, I was going away for an overnight for my best friend's birthday and wasn't sure whether to have a glass of wine (or 2...) after being off alcohol for the past few months. The lovely ladies on here gave me some great advice and encouragement and helped me ease the feelings of guilt for even thinking about it. Well, I had a few glasses of wine and fizz and I am so glad I did! It was so nice to just switch off, relax and have some fun. I say go and enjoy yourself with your friends, you have a stressful few weeks ahead and deserve to have some fun. Xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toLou9

Thanks hun..I remember your post and I should practice what I preach as I am sure I posted๐Ÿ˜‰well had a great night..one small glass of wine, a gnt and half a Guinness so I think I did well๐Ÿ˜€thanks for the support xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143

My consultant advised me that if Im going to have a drink that it's best to drink red wine over other wines as it's contains anti-oxidants ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿทxx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toHannah143

Red tomorrow it is then..thanks for that xx

7AVA profile image
7AVA

I've heard that in Ireland, they brew the Guinness in a special way that creates high quality eggs and embryos โ˜˜๏ธ ๐Ÿ˜œ โ˜˜๏ธ - joking aside, I tried to be so good with my first round and not drink at all - I'm waiting for FET now and have had the odd glass most weekends which has made me feel a lot more normal, good luck whatever you decide to do and have a great time with your mates, Dublin is such a great city xxx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply to7AVA

Well let's hope it's the luck of the Irish eventhough my husband is Irish๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ€I had a half pint and fair enjoyed it..thanks luv xx

E_05 profile image
E_05

Totally with you on this post - I would say go and enjoy your time and have a drink and a cake if you want it! We live our lives by enough routine and put our bodies through hell when we start IVf why should we not enjoy a few things.

I've come to believe it's all about luck tbh, I've tried everything I can think of not eating this, cutting down on that losing weight and if anything it made me even more miserable plus still getting a BFN. Hope you have a great time with your friends xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toE_05

I know exactly what you mean.I feel the very same. I knew I would get excellent advice and reassurance on here and to be honest I enjoyed a few drinks and being sober enough to people watch was a giggle xx

Bluebelle1 profile image
Bluebelle1

Totally with the majority on this one. Had our fresh cycle in April. I was really good didn't drink much on the run up to it and it wasn't successful unfortunately. Second time round last month was our 1st FET we went on holiday a few weeks before we was due to start meds and I relaxed ate nice food and drank a few too many cocktails and got my first ever positive test!!!! Still along way to go, but i definitely believe being happy and relaxed will help more than being super healthy. Go have fun! you can't go to Dublin and not have a Guinness!! xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toBluebelle1

Excellent Mrs I will take your advice๐Ÿ˜‰huge congrats on the bfp that is great ๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ€xxxx

Jonesjp profile image
Jonesjp

I would say everything in moderation Hun, relaxation is far better for you as a stress reliever so I'm quite sure a few can't hurt and anyway, Guinness is full of iron so doesn't count lol ๐Ÿ˜‚!!! X x

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toJonesjp

Thanks Mrs I figure I can't be in dublin and not have a Guinness. .it be rude not too ๐Ÿป๐Ÿป๐Ÿปxxx

kt_11 profile image
kt_11โ€ข in reply tovic77

I'm sure they used to advise pregnant women to drink Guinness because of the iron?! Not suggesting that current evidence supports it (or even that I would fancy trying it ๐Ÿคข) but I'm sure on that basis one wouldn't hurt! ๐Ÿบ

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply tokt_11

Love it I think they were onto something then ๐Ÿ˜œxx

TeamMonkey profile image
TeamMonkey

Personally I think constant obsession and worry over what we consume causes more harm than the odd drink or cake! I had a cycle in July. I had the odd drink maybe one a week and a few weeks before a few on a night out. I still had a few cuppas a week, I still had chocolate when I fancied a bit. I got ohss so during the time between collection and transfer all I had was electrolyte drinks which are full of sugar and addatives plus protein bars and ready salted crisps! In my 2ww I was on holiday so lived on anything I could stomach with ohss lots of bread, pasta, pizza, even the odd coke! I'm currently 7+3 don't stress just try enjoy xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toTeamMonkey

Yay huge congrats to you that's fab news.thanks for the advice you are so right๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿธ๐Ÿธ๐Ÿท๐Ÿท๐Ÿป๐Ÿปxx

TeamMonkey profile image
TeamMonkeyโ€ข in reply tovic77

My friend did ivf a few weeks before me, she did it by the book literally not a drop of anything. Wouldn't touch it if it wasn't a superfood, now I had a ton of super foods, ate superwell running up to my cycle as wanted my eggs to be as good as they could be as I miscarried in march. But she didn't get pregnant even though her embryos were top grade.. my hubby has had sperm so our embryos weren't great this time so it just shows there's a lot of luck involved x

Mrsjj profile image
Mrsjj

I would say stress and anxiety is worse than alcohol caffeine and sugar. Enjoy Dublin and then don't drink when you get back. When I look back on the months running up to my conception I had cut caffeine and sugar from my diet and massively increased my vegetable intake. 1 month before I conceived I drank so much on my birthday. I unknowingly conceived over Xmas and did have a few drinks during this time too and everything is fine.have a great trip x

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toMrsjj

Love it .congrats and thanks. All these stories ate so helpful and funny..we do like a drink onext here..mind you all this shit would turn you to drink..lol xxx

Loopielu profile image
Loopielu

Been having a similar dilemma as I'll either start downreg on holiday, or a few weeks after we get back depending on AF timing, and either way I really don't want to be miserable and totally avoiding all the 'fun' things while I'm supposed to be having fun and relaxing... ๐Ÿ˜‘. I was so good before my last cycle (BFN) and didn't drink while we were away or for any other celebration - I've decided that the clinic say 5 units a week is totally fine and I'm therefore this time I'm just going to be chilled and have a few drinks if I want to, without any guilt! I think feeling normal, having a laugh and just chilling out does you as much good, if not more!! Enjoy Dublin and a Guinness! ๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ€ xx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toLoopielu

It's so tough isn't it. Well I had Guinness last night and prose co with lunch today and having a ball. Thanks ladies xx

I hear you I've done so many sober years for nothing!!! As you say it's not a chore to do when have a baby on the way to look forward to.

I seriously doubt one or two drinks at this stage would do any harm! My consultant told us it was fine and in fact encouraged us to!!! He told us to ditch the sticks and buy a nice bottle of wine instead!!

I haven't had treatment but when trying my rule was no alcohol after my LH surge in case anything had happened ( didn't want to risk anything at that early point).

Anyway I did fall ( despite enjoying the odd glass of wine before ovulation) and I'm 5 weeks pregnant.

Sometimes I think stress is more harmful than having the odd drink (before conception has occurred obviously.)

You enjoy yourself. xoxo

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply to

Thanks so much and such great news about your pregnancy xxxx

Mariec7 profile image
Mariec7โ€ข in reply to

Need to get out a bottle of wine!

โ€ข in reply toMariec7

Our consultant is cool! Haha xoxo

Thank you. All the best with your cycle truly hope it's successful xoxo

Mariec7 profile image
Mariec7

Hi vic77. Enjoy Dublin, I hope you have a great time. I lived there when I worked in The Mater hospital and my husband is Irish, so I know all too well that it's impossible to go to Ireland and not enjoy a drink and the criac! I love Guinness (and in Ireland the Guinness just tastes amazing) and I am sure you know that in the maternity hospitals in Dublin back in the day they would give women a pint of Guinness after they gave birth! When I had my blood tests done before my first IVF cycle they told me Iron levels were very good.I had to laugh thinking of all the Guinness I have enjoyed! My advise would be to not let IVF take over. I talk about vitamins and diet often and I have given up ALOT, coffee, tea, all meat (which I am fine with), Gluten, dairy etc. Alcohol is the one thing I have not given up but I drink rarely and in moderation. It was my mum's bday over the weekend and I had a guilt free drink with her and I enjoyed it! BUT I did keep it to one. My aunt died in June and I was so close to her and as I was caring for her I had a drink in the evenings with family and after her funeral I did drink maybe 3/4 units a week up until the end of June. I was so sad when she died that I didn't want to put added pressure on myself so I let myself grieve. I ate and drank with family and it was important that I did that for the month of June. It was my process that I had to go through. I know my FET wil be in Oct/Nov 2017 so I am being more careful now but if my body wants something I certainly will give it what it wants! To be honest the IVF journey can be miserable if your restrict yourself completely. Its unrealistic. Whats more important is being mentally happy and keeping stress right down. Last night I had a take away because I wanted it. Today I did juice and I am eating healthy so its just all about balance. I am being careful especially with making sure I take my vitamin supplements. I have found this important, for example magnesium has helped with anxiety. I started my period when I was 7 years old and I have been hard on myself over the years. I know my endo, fibroids, cysts etc are not down to having a drink every now and then. When it comes to IVF the doctors and nurses are looking for those people who are smokers and excessive drinkers. If you are drinking maybe put a limit on how much you will have and drink some water in between and make sure to eat! When you come back from Dublin maybe think about having a couple of good days. Some people may disagree but I have cut everything out in the past including alcohol and it made no difference to my pain, bleeds or IVF results. What is key is keeping your stress levels down and if going out with friends and having and laugh and a drink is going to bring you happiness then enjoy! I went for a big detox this year and the doctors said to me that they can help me detox but that I needed to work on my stress. Maybe if I laughed more my fibroids wouldn't keep growing! So enjoy life xxx

vic77 profile image
vic77โ€ข in reply toMariec7

Thanks so much for your thoughtful reply. I agree with everything you say. I did enjoy a half pint of guiness and justified it same way you did๐Ÿ˜‰I hallo had a gnt and some prosecco but most of all I laughed and had fun so just what I needed as start injections tomorrow..thanks again xx

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