minfield of icsi

Hello world.

After trying for a while i was told to go to a clinic and have the test and yes i have a low sperm count, we then got on the big roundabout of NHS fertility treatment and now after 2years of spinning round and round we have jumped off. as we are a little over 35 we can not get any advice or help.

I have had a retrieval operation so my little fella's are chilling somewhere in a freezer waiting to be called up for duty. My good lady has done so much research over the time on the web which has helped us through the maze but now is proving to be a hindrance as we feel every one is on the money grabbing band wagon and just telling us what we want to hear, all facts are contradicting themselves, we even went for a consultation and professional gentleman who said the opposite as to what he wrote in a journal.

My partner is at a all time low all we want to do is find a clinic where people actually feel like they care for us and what we are trying to achieve.

We understand that it may not work the 1st time and we understand that we should have a back up sperm doner and we understand that it will cost.

i am after some advice on clinics but also some counselling as i can't bear to see my partner go through this mental stress any more.

thank you for your time

17 Replies

  • Hi, ask to see a different Gp, then ask them to refer you to a fertility clinic. They should give you an option of which one you want to go to. This is how it worked for us- we picked the Hewitt centre in Liverpool. We had a successful round of Icsi ( husband has low count and morphology). Have you researched entiltlment to bus funding in your area? I'm 31 and my husband is 40.

  • congratulations and thank you for reply

  • Hi there, we've just finished icsi at a local NHS clinic but paid private as husband has a son already so we don't qualify for funding. The good thing with an NHS clinic I imagine, is they're not going to be putting profit first like a private clinic might in terms of selling extras, however we have found the waiting times v.long even though we're paying. Have you had lots of consultations but no actually fertility treatments yet?

  • Because we went down the road of the retrieval etc as they thought i had a blockage yes we have had lots of consultations. We paid for the 1st one to decide where to have the icsi and found the Dr very un sympathetic to our situation and was more concerned about giving us the success rate figures and the statistics he gave us did not equate and on investigation they have no statistics under the governing body and also found that they have changed there name several times yet they have a private clinic in the NHS hospital in London. We are now thinking of paying for another consultation at the same place but this time with the female doctor.1) to see if we get some compassion 2) to get some more answers to the research we have done on the clinic. it shouldn't be this hard to find the clinic.

  • It's really tough isn't it. You just want some help but can feel like you're doing all the hard work and getting no further forward. I don't know whether people can do recommendations on this site, I think there's another one called fertility friends you can ask for recommendations, not sure.

    Another dr in same clinic you went to already may well be more helpful, and perhaps if after that you're still not happy you could branch out. I think some clinics specialise in certain areas e.g. Older women so maybe do some internet searching. Good luck, hang in there.

  • thank you have now signed up to the other site. appreciate your help.

  • Whereabouts in the country are you based?

  • buckinghamshire

  • I've sent you a private message.

  • We've had to use icis for every ivf treatment (now 4). My OH's sperm tested fine but the embryologist wanted us to use it to improve our chances. It's an extra £1,000. I have have pfp twice and currently on tww. As long as it works, that's all we want. Best wishes x

  • This is another thing my partner does not understand as icsi is not the best way (as written in may journals ) fresh and ivf is more successful, unfortunately we can not do this with mine, so we were discussing with the doctor if the 1st time fails ,he was adamant that we will still go the icsi route and didn't answer our questions of concern in fact wouldn't even acknowledge them. Now we have just found last night more reading on line from the Dr who invented IVF who now has retired but feels the whole ivf/icsi has got out of control and the money they charge is wrong also the information and guidance and figures they give is wrong. he offers an online Q&A is this wrong who knows?

  • I can recommend a really good counsellor who does sessions via Skype. She really helped me before and during our ICSI IVF treatment. She helped me to see that ICSI is a unique situation for the female as she will be receiving treatment for a condition that she doesn't have and it's completely normal to find that challenging to get your head around sometimes. If you want her details then send me a DM. Good luck with your journey- if it helps any me and my husband now have 18 month old twins.

  • thank you very much i will be in contact.

  • Sorry to hear all you have been through. As Bibble mentioned, I dont think people can't give recommendations for specific clinics on this site, but the fertilityfriends forum (Google should direct you there) has loads of posts where people have commented on and compared specific named clinics around the country and abroad, so you might find that helpful.

  • thank you this is all a great help.

  • Hey there

    We've been in this minefield too. My OH has azoospermia and had a successful sperm retrieval. We're currently on our 1st round of ICSI and we were so worried about it all but we've still got 5 little embies. The professional that we saw about this was so supportive. We saw him privately and he is based in London. It is a minefield but it's not all bad. If I can help in anyway please don't hesitate to ask. Good luck 🍀

  • Hi

    I can give you a fantastic clinic in London if you would like to pm me I will let you have the details. This clinic has NEVER asked about our ages, or our bmi's and the care is genuine and sincere as well as tailored to individual needs. My husband and I were fobbed off by the NHS for 5 years and eventually we had enough. We have taken the decision to do IVF with ICSI to get our cycle on the way, hopefully we will have egg collection by the beginning of October.

    Hope that this helps

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