Mine field of icsi

[trotter2930]

Hi world, in short it has been a rollercoaster two years and we haven't even got to the clinic.

I have a low sperm count we have gone through 2 years of trying various things from drugs to life change and even standing on one leg whilst drinking water from a spring. Because me and my partner are a little over 35 we can not get any assistance from the NHS they have helped as much as they can(depends which way you look at it) so now we are going private and we are now choosing the clinic.

I have had a retrieval opp and the little fella's are chilling in a freezer somewhere.

My partner is at an all time low as she feels that no one is a) telling the truth. B) no one is compassionate to her feelings. We don't want the big sales patter just some one to install some confidence that they feel for what we are going through and not just after the money.

we are fully aware of the need to have a back up doner and have come to terms with this.

I am after advice for clinics and councillors

if any one can help that would be appriciated.

ta

[Newqgirl1]

I have no advice sorry but I can imagine what that feels like, it's bad enough on the NHS when you have no control and no idea about what's happening to have the added stress of they're just in it for the money must be tough.

Can your gp recommend councillor or can she access counselling through her job? Tough times all round this is no easy journey ❤️ good luck

[trotter2930 in reply to Newqgirl1]

thank you for taking the time to reply, she spoke to a councillor and the reply she got was that you have a anger issue and we don't deal with that bye. i cannot stress the loneliness she is feeling, and i am not a post my problems on the internet/social media type of person but you hear of people moaning about certain issues with the nhs and government and no money etc yet some one who has worked every day of there life and paid tax for every single penny they have earned gets ignored, then you see celebrities saying we should be more caring to others blah blah when my lady was sitting in the park the other day contemplating ending her life she phoned the samaritans and even they didn't answer the phone, you have to feel this country government has let us down and its getting worse.

once again thank you

take care and look after no.1

[Lizzielizzielizzie]

Just with regards to what you are saying about icsi, our consultant (whom I trust) says (in my paraphrasing) that the only additional risk for icsi is that you might pass on your low sperm count to your offspring. I know you're saying that ivf gets better results but I don't believe that's true if you actually look at ivf versus icsi results for your specific scenario (i.e. Sperm problems). My clinic does both nhs and private treatment and the nhs funded icsi for me because the clinic consultant recommended it as the most likely route to success. The nhs don't fund treatments which are not clinically proven.

Yes, icsi generally costs £1000 on top of the ivf cycle costs. But the costs for more cycles of ivf will mount up, to say nothing of the emotional as well as physical costs of egg collection on your partner, which will be high too. It surely makes sense to do whichever has the highest rate of success for your particular condition and I think most clinics are trustworthy in this... it is not in their interests to have additional failed cycles on their books as they have to publish their figures. Maybe you need to accept that icsi is what you need, unfortunately.

It is important to find a clinic and a consultant that you trust though, have you seen that you can compare the success rates of all clinics on the hfea website?

[Lizzielizzielizzie in reply to Lizzielizzielizzie]

Ps sorry, I just realised I replied to your former post in the wrong thread.

Ps2 my clinic recommends vitamins called condensyl (you can buy them online) to improve sperm count. Worth a try?

PS3 can your partner be referred for counseling through her GP at all? If not, maybe see if anything on the fertility U.K. Website can help?

[London7 in reply to Lizzielizzielizzie]

Hi, just to second what Lizzie has said - we did our IVF through the NHS and also did ICSI (v low sperm count). The NHS consultants also said the only downside (other than the cost, which thankfully we didn't have to pay for) of ICSI is that it MAY result in the male fertility issue being passed on, but even the research on that is not conclusive. So I wouldn't be too quick to write it off. It did work for us - we got 10 fertilised and very good quality 5-day blasts. I also agree with Lizzie that the key is to find a consultant / clinic you trust. If you can't get funding perhaps look into whether there are any NHS clinics that take private patients, as I do think the NHS clinics are after results not just to take your money, which gives me more confidence.

[trotter2930 in reply to London7]

ok throw some clinics into the pot. cheers

[trotter2930 in reply to Lizzielizzielizzie]

Hi thanks for taking the time to reply, i cant start to discuss with you the funding within the NHS as this is a bigger debate because when they say no funding

to people like myself yet they find hundreds of thousands of pounds to fund the experimentation of wombs with in transgender males!!!

Anyway yes we have been on the HFEA website and the clinic we were re-fered to don't exist, we then found out they changed there name so we checked them out ooppss no HFEA recognised results! then we find out that one of the directors has had a clinic for a few years so we checked him out and he has a 17% success rate funny how he told us in the consultation that his clinic was 40%

We have excepted ICSI is our way forward but trying to find either the clinic with the right figures (allegedly) and a bit of compassion is hard.

Yes i have tried the vitamins condensy also the steroids one of our consultants prescribed.

reference counselling thorough NHS we have tried to book several meetings even going down the over the phone approach and when they finally called her back they said she had anger issues and they do not deal with that. no other recommendations just hung up, so i have now taken the mantle and trying to find councillors my self the 3 i have left answerphone messages yet no reply but it has only been 24 - 48 hours.

thanks once again