My first time on here so please be gentle with me.
We are coming to terms with the fact my eggs are too old!!!!! we have been told about donor eggs and just wanted to hear if anyone has gone through this. Either side, donating your eggs or having a child with a donor egg.
Worried it won't feel like my child.
Thanks.x
Hi there, welcome.
I am in the 2WW with donor eggs and we went to a clinic abroad. Regardless of the outcome, I do not regret my decision for a second. The entire process has been smooth sailing (well as smooth as IVF is ever going to be!) although I have definitely bought a ticket to the 'funny farm' over the last 9 days...going stir crazy!!
50% of the child's genetic make-up will come from your husband and you will pass between 20-30% of your own genetic material to the baby when carrying it, the remainder obviously comes from you donor. At the end of the day, it is not genetics that make families, it is love.
Emu, on the forum, has just fallen pregnant with donor eggs and she is an absolute delight. I hope she will pop on here to contribute.
Whatever you decide, I wish you only the best xx
Never thought about me passing on genetic material during the growing process. Thanks. Def have lots of research and reading to do.
Getting used to all the abbreviations what's WW?
Which clinic abroad did you use? What's the benefit of using an overseas clinic? Sorry don't want to sound nosy just interested in other people's experiences.
Wishing you the best of luck.xx
Sorry, 2WW stands for two week wait. I had two blastocysts transferred 9 days ago and am on the countdown to knowing if we have been successful or not...hence the doolally state of my head at the moment!
I can't discuss clinics with you on this open forum, we are not allowed, but I could private message you if you are interested?
Overseas clinics were an easy choice for me. I was too old for any funded treatment with the NHS and the local clinics we looked into were incredibly expensive. Overseas, donor matches are almost instant - I had a donor in 5 days - whereas here it can take a good few weeks at a minimum. Also, overseas donors are often anonymous (depends which country you go to). It is a personal decision, but my husband and I wanted an anonymous donor and you cannot have that in this country. It all depends on what is important to you. There are some outstanding clinics in the UK, but it was not for us.
Thanks for the kind words xx
Hi Asweetlea. Well, all I can say, is that I have met and spoken to many happy parents who have achieved their families by using donor eggs. It does give you the wonderful opportunity of growing your baby, giving birth and even breast feeding if you want. You will wonder and have many thoughts and questions to ask I'm sure, but hopefully with the right support you will get there too. I'm sure you will get lots of experienced people reply to you. Thinking of you. Diane
Everything CountryCat said I agree with... at 33 I found out my own egg days were done with. I got my BFP on 22 May with donor eggs from Cyprus.
There's a book; having your baby through egg donation. It's quite American but very helpful.
So many of us would be happy to answer questions xx
I have just got my bfp with DE (very early days) but can honestly say I haven't look back and we have just accepted our family will come together in a slightly different way. Feel free to message me as I know how hard and scary it is at first. Xxx
Good luck.x
I found the Donor Conception website useful when considering DE for our 3rd Round of ICSI. It took me quite a while to get my head round the idea. I was concerned about bonding with the resultant baby/babies. We stayed in the UK for our self funded treatment. DE treatment is more expensive and although the statistics are better (we were told 40%) there are no quarantees it'll work sadly. We had to have an implications counselling session before being accepted to receive DE. This was to tell us to tell the child DE were used but we'd already had that conversation ourselves. We got 7 eggs (on a sharing scheme) but only 3 were mature. Sadly it didn't result in a BFP and nothing to freeze but it has worked for others.
Good luck!
Thank you all so much for telling your stories. It's so nice to know that we're not alone.
I think me and my OH have lots to think about. Thanks for all the pointers of information sources. Looks like there's a lot out there. Feel a bit over whelmed at the moment. Only had our consultation last night!!
Welcome my dear.. Well I had ivf 4 times with own eggs in London and was advised to move onto Donor eggs at 40 as I miscarried twice and 2 negative results.. So round 5 I went to Greece for Donor eggs, after my long protocols on previous rounds I found my Donor round the easiest and I was at my calmest.. I'm currently 17 weeks pregnant.. Nervous still but very happy... And I can say after my journey I don't even really think the eggs came from anyone else.. It just feels right. Meant to be.. Hope this helps and wish you well on your journey... Happy to answer any questions you may have.. Lots of love Jackie x
I have had 6 attempts with my own eggs and then went down the DE route. The waiting lists in the UK was really bad so we decided to go abroad (pm me for more information) as the waiting lists are a lot less and the guidelines are different regarding anonymous donation.
As one of the ladies said above during pregnancy about 20% of genetic material will come for you.
Did it bother me about going down the DE route - No because the parent is the one that brings up the child irrelevant of biological material.
We got pregnant from our first fresh DE cycle but sadly we lost the baby early and had a MC. I have just gone through my first frozen transfer from the frozen embryos we have left but sadly a BFN.
So there are no guarantees but the odds are way better than trying to carry on with my own eggs etc.
Good luck in what decision you make and where you go to have the treatment.
xxx
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