A tough day at work ....

[NMP1026]

Well today has been tough... I have always been career minded and ambitious with my job. I always wanted to get into a senior post and maybe one day management. However there has recently been an advertisement for a senior which I decided due to this journey I wouldn't apply. We are just at the start and I have no idea what lies ahead. Today people have been interviewed and so many people have asked me about it. I really didn't know what to say. I'm now all confused as to whether I should have applied. I guess it is the joys of the journey....

[lou79]

When trying to conceive and going through the IVF process we put so many things on hold. Our lives are full of 'no better not plan anything too far ahead...just incase...' etc. So it can feel that you are putting your life on hold and are existing in some sort of limbo! My advice would be to go for promotion the next time a position becomes available to apply for. Because you will still be able to manage your treatment, time off etc and god willing maternity leave in the future. We always find a way! Plus when a little one comes along you will be glad of the extra bit of salary that promotion would provide. Go for what you want in life. One day you will be a fantastic mother and have a rewarding career too. It's hard work, but us women are built to be tough. Good luck with everything xx

[Justus1]

Know how u feel. I've been doing this for the past two years. Doesn't get any easier. But Lou79 makes some good points

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi NMP1026. Life is all about decision making, and making the right choices. You have made the choice to go through with a treatment cycle I believe, while you can. This is the right choice for you now. Hopefully another chance of a job in management or whatever will come along again, but meantime you've got another job to do, one I wish you huge success with. Thinking of you. Diane

[Oakey80]

Hiya, I've been in a similar position recently where I wanted to go for a promotion at the point of going through treatment. I thought long and hard about it and decided to go for the role (it just felt right)...as it stands my treatment failed this time but I got the promotion!

Since starting the ball rolling in fertility treatment over 3yrs ago I've relocated for my work 120 miles, bought & sold houses, been on lots of holidays and changed my role 4x in my current company incl. 2 x promotions (Its a big company and I seem to be in demand!)

I've made the decision not to put my life on hold as infertility is a part of me but it doesn't define me. I'll always find a workaround if I need to!

Just this week we've purchased our first (old) campervan 😁 which has been a dream for years. We could have kept putting it off thinking that money might be better spent on private treatment in the future but I still have a frozen nhs go left (which we're starting next month)...so we decided we'll cross that bridge if it comes to it! In the meantime we're going to have lots of fun travelling here, there & everywhere!

I know 100% I want a child more than anything but I also know I only have 1 life so I need to keep living it now.

What I would say in all this though is you have to do what's right for you as only you really understands your situation...don't worry about what others are doing or not doing, but don't ever think you can't do something because of infertility (if that makes sense?)

Hope that helps in some small way...and good luck with your journey.

xxx

[NMP1026]

Aww bless thanks so much to everyone for their words of support! Everyone makes so much sense. I definitely intend to carry on living... who knows what life will through at us and I don't want to let it pass us by.

I do feel generally lucky, a great job, lovely family and my DP is truly the best man I could ever have asked to meet. I think more than the job yesterday it was about the realisation that IVF can be a scary, lonely place that can have and does have a massive impact on life that not many people understand. but your responses helped me realise that there are other lovely people out there on this journey. Thanks all so much for taking the time to respond and offering words of advice. I wish you all the very best of luck xxx

[72cloud9]

Definitely know the feeling of putting things on hold on this journey in case of.... what ifs ...

try not to stress too much.it felt right at the time not to apply.that was your gut instinct, go with that. U r only doubting yourself becos of other people's questioning.

Big hugs xxx

[NMP1026]

Thanks 72cloud9.

I feel a lot better now and actually taking other people's comments as positive. It's nice that they thought I stood a chance!

I wish you lots of luck. Hugs xx