Its all over after BFP

Well after my BFP only a few days ago and becoming a serial tester the lines on my tests were reducing in strenght until i got a negative.

My clinic have undertook bloods over the last few days and my beta levels have dropped and its all over. To expecty period within a week.

I actually cant believe it, i feel so stupid, so hurt and so angry.

It was my first attempt at IVF and I know the information will be useful to take forward but just makes your more stressed its never going to happen. I sort of thought its crap i cant seem to get pregnant naturally but its ok IVF will sort me out. If only....

Would like to thank you all for your lovely wishes, even now they mean a lot.


27 Replies

  • I'm so sorry, i thought like you too, it'll take time to feel better, i now feel ready to go again after my first bfn after my cycle in February! Big hugs! Xxx

  • Thanks Jam, Wishing you all the luck in the world on your next cycle xx

  • Been in similar situation to you and agree it's so hard because you do think IVF is the answer. 

    All I can says is let all your emotions out and lean on each other when you need to. 

    Hopefully our time will come and I'm thinking for all I'm not looking forward to next round, I will have more knowledge. Sending you hugs and hopefully next time will be more successful x

  • Thankyou crazy cat, I really hope so xx

  • Dear LBM, this is so vey hard to find the soothing words here. But I really would like to as I know how painful it can be. We got the same result after the first IUI treatment. Just like you felt happy and excited. Then everything turned upside down. "Sorry, dear, your pea had vanished" - this is how it ached in my head. I felt miserable then, questioning myself what I CAN actually do.

    Now I know this was just silly from my side as infertility is a damn cruel game we're playing. Every person hopes for the best and gets so much disappointed in what she/he gets. But every failure makes us stronger, now I absolutely value our time spent on this path. I adore my family, my 8 mo DE son. I love my husband and am so much dedicated to them both.

    I had that tough moment just like you once, but it showed us: First, IUI was not for us in our case. Second, how greatly my DH takes care of me, how supportive and understanding he is.

    I believe such episodes are given to us not in vain. They teach us lots of things.

    I hug you strongly, dear, may your soul and body recover soon xxx

  • Thankyou Angeleee you are so right, i have never felt closer to my husband as I have through this cycle and whilst it was never in doubt it has assured me of my love for him. I am so pleased to hear you are now on the other side of the process.xxxx

  • Oh hun, I'm so so sorry to hear that. That's so devastating after getting a BFP and now I'm sure you feel like everything has been taken away. 

    Please never give up hope, I like you thought IVF would be the answer and I would get pregnant the first or second time and here I am after 3 cycles of IVF with great embryos and everything looking well only to have fallen at the final hurdle and get negative result after negative result. It's so hard and frustrating, you feel angry but you don't know who with, you feel like you are being punished and the sadness can be overwhelming.

    But sometimes it takes 2 trys or 3 or more and hopefully your clinic will have a review of your case and come up with a plan for you trying again and see if there is anything different they can do or advise. I really hope you feel better soon and I found when I was preparing to try again I regained my focus and hope and found myself a stronger person because of what I'd been through.

    You will get there in the end, it's just a hard road for a lot of us, keep hoping, keep strong. Wishing you so much luck for success next time xx

  • Thanks Isa, I am so sorry to hear of your unsuccessful cycles.

    Why does this happen to us eh, its so unfair.

    As you say we have to believe our time will come and it will be worth it all in the end.

    Wishing you lots of luck on your next cycle.xx

  • Just wanted to say I'm really sorry! Can't imagine what you're going through!! Look after yourself!!x

  • Thankyou Cinderella xx

  • So sorry to hear this xxx

  • Thanks Button xx

  • It's such a hard roller coaster of emotions.  Take time for yourself now and when you are ready, then have a another go.

    Good luck and wishes x

  • Thanks distinction.xx

  • Am sorry to hear that, did they class it as a chemical?

  • Hey tamtam yes thats what they have said. My levels have dropped to the point now its classed as a faint positive but should expect my period within the week. Just wish it would come now.xx

  • Take care of yourself while you take time out to heal x

  • Thankyou xx

  • Sorry to hear this. Don't give up. The first cycle is the hardest physically and emotionally you will be well prepared for the next one and FX it will be successful x

  • Thanks smileycat, I hope so xx

  • I'm so sorry to hear this, take time to grieve and be kind to yourself and each other, then in time you'll feel strong enough to go again. Lots of hugs x

  • Thanks maria-louise xx

  • So sorry to hear this news. Please take care of yourself. Thinking of you and your husband xxx 

  • Thankyou Murph82, xx

  • I'm so sorry to hear your news. I felt like you did too, won't happen naturally but will with IVF. Give yourself time and enjoy life for a while. Take care xxx

  • Near enough same has just happened to me got my long awaited bfp after the awful 2ww was 2faint positives but I thought yay a positive! A day or so later I used a digital and it said not pregnant I convinced myself I had done test wrong tested late in afternoon etc. Anyway had sore boobs fleeting nausea smell aversion for first week then it seemed apart from boobs everything else went 😥 I started spotting on the Monday before my viability scan on the 22nd Thursday when we went for scan DH was so excited but in my head I knew something wasn't right and kept trying to prepare us both whilst in back of my mind praying that our miracle was there and no no sac nothing just a thickened endometrium which she said meant I was pregnant but lost some comfort huh. Anyway all the hopes dreams were done for now it was time to get off the roller coaster. I bled with clots by the weekend and the pain was bad they rang after doing my bloods and said my hcg was negative so I pondered whether they thought I had made it all up I know my hormones lol.this was our first fet after failed fresh so hope to get back on the ride when I next bleed but I have asked for an appointment with consultant as I want to push for two embryos my BP has been high in the past and I have crohns so resisting putting two in but I really want to I have 4 embryos so I hope my decision will be listened to and considered. I hope you are healing as I am trying to sounds like your other half has been amazing so has mine it's really strenghthened things and in my moments of feeling a failure he is my rock Xx sending baby dust for your next cycle xx

  • I'm so sorry to hear this. It's such a hard journey. You shouldn't beat yourself up about being excited, you're not stupid at all. The hardest part of all of this is trying to stay balanced but it's impossible to be positive and realistic at the same time. Take care of yourself, sending love x x x

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