All systems go!!

I went for my third counselling meeting yesterday and was a little worried because there was a chance they would stop my treatment due to not having much of a support network of people around me. Anyway I mentioned a few things that I have done and also this site and it was agreed I can go ahead with it.

I'm feeling very anxious, scared, excited all rolled into one!!

Trying to go through this all on your own, no partner support, no one to come to the appointments with me is so hard. I don't know how I'm going to get through it.

For me, not having a partner to share all the decissions with and the fact that its all very clinical are the parts that worry me the most.

I would of preferred to of met someone and had a baby the normal way (whatever normal is) than this but I guess its my last chance so have to go through it all one step at a time.

Is anyone else, going it alone?!! x

16 Replies

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  • Hi. What a amazing strong person you are. Im not going through this on my own, so can't even imagine how hard it is for u. I hope your treatment goes well x x just because u haven't found mr right doesn't mean your not entitled to be a parent! X x good luck x x

  • Thank you!! I've been in severel relationships but for various reasons they didn't work out. Then when you get over 40 and are looking, a lot of the men already have children so don't want anymore.

    Of course I don't want to always be on my own but looking for a partner now whilst I go through this wouldn't be right. So maybe in time to come. Also my relationship that I had last year which ended affected me in such a big way that I'm not entirely over it.

    I guess I'm stronger than I think I am! xx

  • I would say good for you, you've made a decision and you've gone for it. You should feel proud of yourself. Whilst I have a partner, believe me when I say there will be ladies on this website who find their partners either unhelpful or not willing to discuss the ivf that they are as good as doing this on their own. My partner gets frustrated if I try to talk about ivf and won't allow me to tell his side of the family about it so for many different reasons ivf can at times feel like a lonely process. I think you've work hard on finding sources of support and you will definitely be able to do this. Good luck and keep us posted X

  • Thank you so much.

    It's the times like anti natal classes, giving birth etc that its going to hit me the hardest I think - if or when I'm to be lucky with this! x

  • Good on you my lovely!! So pleased you are going ahead with it!!! Xx

  • Thank you so much - I will keep you updated on here as to how everything goes!! x

  • Hi Distinction72, you are definitely one strong women doing IVF alone! There was a documentary on a few months ago which focussed on women having children alone. I can't remember what it was called but I remember thinking how courageous they all were. Wishing you the best of luck and a positive outcome from your treatment x x x

  • I'm having DI treatment to start with anyway. Where I use my own eggs and none are taken out to start with so just a donor insemination.

    I think I saw that documentary, wasn't it on 3 ladies going abroad to do it?

    Thank you so much and I am sure you will see my posts on here x

  • How strong you are! Good luck and hope everything works perfectly for you :) xxx

  • Thank you - maybe I am stronger than I think I am!!

    Love that duck picture, that made me smile!! x

  • Hi Distinction72 Just wanted to say Good Luck and I hope it all works out for you. Definitely being on these type of support forums will really help you not to feel alone. Also you may want to call the Infertility Network UK and the Donor Conception Network as both of these charities may be able to point you in the direction of other women who have been through fertility treatments on their own to & I'm sure they would only be too glad to connect with you. Off the top of my head I dont know of any fertility bloggers in the same situation as yourself, but I bet there are some! Or you could start blogging about your journey :-) All the best x

  • Thank you. I must admit, most women on here do have a partner which kind of makes me feel as if not many are like me!!

    How do I start blogging about my journey - doing it alone? x

  • Hi there. Sorry for the delay in replying. You are definitely not alone! Research shows that an increasing number of women in their late 30s & early 40s are starting a family on their own, it has doubled in the last 5 yrs. After I posted I thought about FertilityFriends - an online support forum - they have a forum for single women, this is the link (if the link doesnt work just go to Forums in FertilityFriends and scroll down) fertilityfriends.co.uk/foru... Definitely suggest you sign up - it's free. There was also a Radio 4 programme on single women and IVF, this is the link: bbc.co.uk/programmes/b040llvd Check out the I N UK website for support groups near you, they are run by clinics or by independant people and they are face2face, if you are not too keen on online forums. Regards starting a blog - I'm not experienced in it but alot of Bloggers use Wordpress and I'm sure if you Google 'Starting a blog' you will find loads of advice. Hope this all helps you and all the best x

  • Many thanks for your reply x

  • You're welcome Distinction72. Just came across this: singlemothersbychoice.org/ & thought of you. They provide information, resources, and a great virtual and local support network. It may help you. All the best x

  • Thank you - I wouldn't class myself as a single mother by choice though, I'm having a baby this way because of my situation not because I wanted too. I would of much rather of done it the normal way! x