Anxious IVF

After a year of losing weight I've managed to lose 3stone but the last two won't shift after 6 months of trying I've decided to go private, I'm hoping my weight won't stop me from getting pregnant. My sister is donating her eggs so I can't put her life on hold any longer, we receive our medication next week, so nervous and anxious that it won't work but excited at the same time that it might, trying to keep level headed. I'm 30 next year so to have a baby this year would be a dream come true. But I'm gutted I couldn't lose that extra weight so I could get it free on NHS, do u think I'm being silly wanting to go private and risking my chances with my BMI not at the recommended level?

5 Replies

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  • Fantastic that your sister is donating to you. There are quite a few sibling donors, I know of. what has your clinic told you? They will be able to advise about BMI. But if you've stayed the same for 6 months, mention it to them. 3 stone is brilliant. We have had most procedures privately. Our 1 attempt on the NHS went disastrously.

    Take care of yourself. You know what's right for you.

  • Well done on your weight loss that's amazing! My bmi is higher than the recommended we paid private I'm 35 and am currently 21weeks pregnant with a little girl! It only takes one so try not to pressure yourself stay positive and think baby! Good luck xx

  • I had to loose a bit of weight before I started treatment but i was told that even private clinics were strict on this matter too so you're lucky to find one that's willing to do the procedure.my only concern would be that they were only doing it for the money . I'm not saying that they are but make sure you ask all the right questions first . you could always try lighter life sort of thing as they are a quick fix diet and would be cheaper in the long run . good luck with whatever you decide xxxx

  • I'm in the same boat as you, NHS told me to come back when i had lost 2st (i've lost 3st) i've now been told that the rules have changed and i need to lose another 1 1/2st. THEY then told me if i paid private at THERE clinic i meet the criteria now (wtf). I have decided to pay private and get this started. The nurse i spoke to at the NHS told me she doesn't even agree to this bmi thing, she said other than my bmi i am perfectly healthy as i don't smoke, don't drink and i'm active, my only problem is i have pcos and struggle with my weight. She said she doesn't see any reason i cant carry a baby just the same as anyone else and that the difference of being a bmi of 30 or a bmi of 33 (which i am) isn't going to change much. I think you shouldn't worry about numbers and look at your own lifestyle, if your fit, healthy and try to take care of yourself there is no reason why this shouldn't work for you. It's really good of your sister donating to you, my sister is going to surrogate for me if i'm not successful within the next 3 years (i'm 35 now). Good luck

  • Well done on the weight loss, three stone is fantastic! Just a thought but would it be better to spend the money on a personal trainer or a nutritionist to help you try to get to the required BMI? Might even be cheaper than private IVF and as sjamalou says you may need to lose it for private treatment anyway.

    I agree with pollyr3 that getting to a specific BMI seems to have little impact on your fertility. I’m within the required BMI, have never smoked, done drugs, rarely drink, I eat healthy and exercise and I have not been able to get pregnant to date. I know plenty of friends and family who have abused their bodies in various ways over the years and seem to get pregnant crossing on the stairs! Sorry rant over!

    It’s very frustrating that some of us face these issues when others never will. Controlling your weight when you’re stressed about not being able to conceive is really hard.

    Good luck whatever you choose to do xx

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