3 Year Old refuses to poo on toilet

[BristolBlueGas]

Hi, looking for some help please?!. My 3yo boy refuses to poo anywhere but in his nappy at night time. We started potty training him 10 months ago. Wee is absolutley fine.. He has done a poo on the toilet in the past a couple of times but always defaults back to the nappy. He gets very angry if we try to talk to him about it and shouts "i dont know what to do!" Or "Leave me alone" or "I cant!". We have tried rewards, threats of toys being taken away but nothing works. Hes never been constipated or had a painful poo (to my knowledge) so just stuck with what to do. He starts school in September and cant see this stopping!!.. any ideas/treatments??.. thank you!. 🙂

[Toddler_ox]

Hi, we are having virtually identical experience with our daughter. And again am seeking help as not sure what to try next. Our most recent was to say we had run out of nappies and wait to see. She excepted it and tried on the toilet several times but no luck. She then went several days without a poo so I got worried about constipation and in the end gave nappies back.

[BristolBlueGas in reply to Toddler_ox]

Hi, I feel your pain.. I'm just not sure of they are scared, stubborn or something else?!.. hoping someone reads this and gives us the answer!! 😵‍💫

[Mintchoc]

It will come - give it time. My son is same age and same thing. He will use toilet at nursery but not at home. So we have gone for the “compromise” of pants in the day and nappy at night. Always uses nappy for poos but this means he isn’t getting constipated and will be okay to start school as using pants in the day. Try to dial down the emotional stress around it and pile on praise for any use of the toilet and it will resolve itself! He won’t be using nappies when he’s 18. So try not to get stressed about it. Everything is just a phase!

[Allysha26]

call this number this number ERIC Helpline 0808 169 9949 Mon - Thurs 10.00am – 2.00pm highly trained advisors can provide specialist information and advice on any childhood continence issue. They are so so helpful and will guide on what you need to do. Remember your doing great and you’re the best mum 😍🥰

[Toddler_ox]

I have tried calling the ERIC help line several times but no one ever picks up. Them filled in online form but the reply had a link to book an advisor slot but then none showed up as available on the calender. Their online event this month is sold out and no one from the org has replied to this thread.

[BristolBlueGas in reply to Toddler_ox]

Hi, how is your situation going? We had some joy on Sunday where he held poo in for 3 days and with loads of persuasion and sitting on toilet for over an hour he done it.. however no Poo all week, dancing, tip toes, sucking it back in, dirty pants finally tonight he done it in his nappy again so back to square one.. you found any tips at all? We are at wits end... treats, punishments, bribes, everything.. we have tried everything. 😔

[Toddler_ox in reply to BristolBlueGas]

Hi, how's it all been going? We had a break through by using the nappy bags that you put on a travel potty. We had a potette travel potty so it's those bags. We got our daughter to put her feet into the bag handles and wear the bag when she did a poo instead of her nappy. She was reluctant to begin with but did it after a second try.

We got her doing that for a while which got her use to the sensation of not feeling the poo after it had come out (like you do wearing a nappy), but she was still wearing something so had that security. After a few weeks she actively asked to try on the toilet. And after a few attempts managed a poo

[14crosstitch14]

He wouldn't be doing it in front of others. Their's lots of help, poo story. I played a potty game wth ropped up shapes coloured brown useingbears and dolls. My girls have a fidget toy and alexa on to relax them. Their all passed it now for toilet training. Not sure about boys. Toilet routine is very important befire and after meals. 10 minuites timer, or i tell girls 3/4 songs. Not 2 snds. Good luck. X

[Movilady]

Hi. Whilst you wait for the helpline to get back to you. If you go onto Eric.org.uk website they have plenty resources to help with this problem. They do have an information leaflet for children who will only poo in a nappy.

it’s hard to see things any different but it will get better.