How to help child withholding poo

[Gertru]

My son withholds his poo. Its been nearly a year since he has been dry on the toilet training front. He wears a nappy for bed as we've not yet tackled night time training because of his poo issues. He will occasionally do it in his nappy if we don't catch him in time. Even as a baby he would not poo for 3 to 4 days. Now he is dry he will withhold it for 7 days. When they do come they are so long it barely fits in the toilet. He does not always appear to be in pain when he eventually releases but is extremely distressed by doing it. No rewards have worked he is not interested in any of them. I've tried talking to him but he just says he doesn't want to and sometimes scary. any advice would be appreciated as it's really effecting family life. Sometimes we cant even leave the house when we know it's on its way usually day 7! I don't want this to cause further problems but don't know how else to tackle this. His diet consists of lots of foods to help him go e.g. Fibre and fruit.

[Al29416]

My little boy is exactly like this too. When we’re at home, I’ll leave him bottom half naked so he has to go toilet. But he will hold it and hold it until I put his nappy on for bed, he’ll wait till I’ve gone and poo in that. He won’t tell me he’s done it either until we wake up and I see for myself. I can tell he feels ashamed and embarrassed

[Gertru in reply to Al29416]

Sorry to hear that. Awful isn't it. Our problem is only getting worse now. I'm going to try new steps that he can rest his feet on at the toilet and start on the movicol today and also buy some caster oil and a reward chart. He's going less in his nappy now but that's making it worse because he's not releasing it at all. Wish me luck! X

[Al29416 in reply to Gertru]

I ended up ringing the doctors and he gave him laxido powder sachets but it isn’t making him go more, it’s just making it more messy! I’ve changed his diet slightly, only water for drink and loads of fruit in between meals and a lot of veg! We’ve been making smoothies a few times a week as well which he loves! Hopefully he gets there before starting reception in September 😬 good luck to you!! You’ll have to let me know how you get on x

[Mammabear_20]

Hi there.

My son also holds his poo. Hes 5 next month and this has been ongoing since he was 2 after an episode of severe constipation. The longest hes gone is 20 days and this resulted in a suppository and an enema which absolutely traumatised him but he still holds. I do feel it is more psychological with my little boy, he has a fear of it hurting. Hes become immune to movicol, senna makes him sick and lactulose doesn't work, he has sodium picosulfate which gives him severe abdominal cramps.

We are seeing a new peadiatrition next month, I would absolutely push for this of i was you. It's so difficult and I'm just told he'll grow out of it but that doesn't help me here now, in the present. Hes so miserable, he says it ruins his life. No 4 year old should have to think like that.

I absolutely understand your struggles and how you must be feeling and I'm so sorry you're going through this 😥

[Gertru in reply to Mammabear_20]

Thank you so much for your reply it really does help to know you're not alone and the cliché saying of 'this is quite common in boys!' we started on the movicol on Saturday then had a day without it on Sunday but used a natural syrup product I found at the supermarket (last poo was Thursday) he went yesterday on Sunday but it was still extremely big and took about 4 hours of it coming for him to finally do the deed. Today we had some more movicol (trying to do alternative days to start with) and he did very small bits on the toilet when he was weeing but I'm not convinced he had much control over it. I wanted to give it a few weeks to see if things improve with medication but I also wanted to go down the doctors route to seek professional advice and further support and to be monitored at least. I fear I may have already left it too late.

I'm so sorry to hear that your 4 year old feels so desperately low and really pray that things change for you all soon. As I completely understand how it effects daily like and the stresses it puts on all your relationships. Thank you so much for replying. X

[Mammabear_20 in reply to Gertru]

That's lovely, thank you so much. You can never leave it too late, they're very much restricted to what they can do in small children anyway. You're very much aware of it and doing what you can!

High five to us mamas 👏 x

[14crosstitch14]

I haveva poo app, called poo gose to poo land it may help. Its an nhs advice. Which led me to this forum. Another suggested trying bubbles as they can not withold and use it i think was said.

[14crosstitch14]

Plenty exercise, running around in the park. Things to get him going. Sweet corn will help as he can not digest it so it has to come out. Also water and exercise will get him moving.