Desperate Mummy!

[purplegiraffe12]

Getting desperate! My son’s 4yrs 4months and at 2.5yrs and again at 3.5yrs he chose to toilet train. Both times he was dry but never managed to master poos. He regressed at nearly 3 when his baby brother arrived but we tried again at 3.5 and he got wees in a week but still not poos. He’s been having wee ‘accidents’ again for months and this time he doesn’t seem to know about it or be bothered, by either wees or poos. He very rarely asks to go for a wee and we’re constantly on his case. We go through so many clothes!! With poos he can do lots of small ones, sometimes 7 or 8 in a day and very occasionally will do a huge poo. Everything is really smelly, big or small. Took him to docs in November to be tested for a UTI but all clear so referred us to children’s continence team, who referred us to school nursing team, who sent us to a health drop in session (all without seeing him). Went through all the usual tactics for them to decide he needs to drink more....doing that, trying a different reward method, nursery writing everything down, but still no change. I don’t know what to do. He’s such a bright boy but isn’t getting it, or maybe he can’t get it, physiologically rather than mentally?! What next? Feel like no one wants to see him or take it seriously as he’s still a preschooler. Help!! Please!

[Jellyfish0]

Do you think he could be constipated? Would it be worth doing a disimpaction to see if it makes a difference at all?

I’m going through similar with my son. I really want to get this sorted before he starts school so am feeling the time pressure a lot (trying to hide this pressure from my son though).

[purplegiraffe12 in reply to Jellyfish0]

Thank you for your reply. I’m feeling time pressure of school too and also trying to hide it, although we talk about being a big boy for school. I’ve been watching him today and he has no idea he’s wetting. I definitely think it’s constipation and am taking him to GP next week. Get a decent dose of laxatives and take it from there! Good luck with your situation too.

[Lolabetty]

Hi I would suggest calling ERIC for advice, been having similar issues with my daughter who is around the same age. Have upped her on Movicol and she has made great progress over the last few weeks, seems she was holding everything in so is weeing much more freely

Now as well. Sounds like he is constipated - good luck, it’s so stressful!!

[purplegiraffe12 in reply to Lolabetty]

Thanks for your reply. Have heard lots about Movicol and think he needs a decent, prescribed dose of something for sure. I need someone to listen and take us seriously now, so appointment booked for next week. Glad to hear you’re making good progress.

[Lolabetty in reply to purplegiraffe12]

In my experience the GP’s are not as helpful on this subject as they should be. I’d call ERIC before you go and would recommend a book you can get from their site called Stool Withholding by Sophia Ferguson she has a website of the same name which is also useful. So I would go armed with a bit of research

We are a million miles away from where we were two weeks ago so things can improve really quickly once you get the right advice!

[Sammy2014]

Hi,

I’ve got two sons, eldest is 5 and he’s been on Movicol since he was nearly 3. He started to stool withold when he trained. He’s been on one sachet of Movicol per day for 2 years and we are slowly reducing it now. It helps them with the sensation of needing to go but it requires them to drink a lot of fluid to make it work. We’ve had a few setbacks as we tried to cut the Movicol out too quickly - for him it was behavioural. He was initially scared and it then turned into being too engrossed in play and not wanting to sit on the toilet for longer than a couple of minutes. We have made huge progress. He can go of his own accord now or I tell him to go before bed. My GP referred me to an amazing paediatrician at our local hospital who specialises in this area - it is through him that we’ve come out of this on the other side.

My youngest - nearly 3 has been dry in the day for a month and spent a week pooing on the toilet and has now stopped. He needs a nappy but won’t tell me when he needs one so I have to guess. He’s very stubborn and I can see that this may go the same way as his brother. He has also started wetting this last week. Is very common for them to lose control of their bladder when holding in a bowel movement. I’m going to persevere with the nappy for a bit longer with him and see what happens.

A Movicol disimpaction will work to hopefully clear out your sons system. It’s not pleasant but it works! You can then find a maintenance dose that your son responds to. For my son it was 2 sachets a day before we reduced it to 1 sachet.

Ask questions on here as many of us have experience of the procedure.

I wish you all the luck in the world. Do phone the ERIC helpline as others have suggested and I would also ask for a referral to a paediatrician.

[giul8bruce]

I m sorry to hear that my heart goes to you I did not realise that my daughter had an issue with constipation until school told me that she was bleeding whilst doing a wee.. then they found out she had urinary infection and after that is same saga as many of us here.. if you want to contact me in private for support please do so..right now.. much much progress.. after 1 month on right medication but these things are long term so not yet out of the wood .. I m here x you