Feel like I'm going mad: My nearly 6 year has been... - ERIC

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Feel like I'm going mad


My nearly 6 year has been pooing himself his whole life. Over the holidays did a disimpaction and he did a few poos on the toilet but is back to pooing himself. He even said to me that he poos his pants because it's easier and he can carry on playing. I'm at a loss. I've tried prizes , being "normal" and not being angry but nothing works! School called me to say he pooed himself and it was all dried on and could I come clean him up. I feel like a massive failure as a mum. Why won't he poo on the loo! The school nurses aren't interested just tell me to go to the doctor. The doctor just says change the amount of movicol. My husband pooed himself as a kid until he was 7 . And he said he only stopped cos he realised it was easier to poo on the toilet rather than have schemes such as putting toilet paper in his pants etc. I emailed the Eric website helpline and they responded 2 months later and they were clearly responding to someone else's email as half way through the email talked about "your grandson who's will only poo in the nappy" that's not my problem? So all the tips related to this boy and not mine. Can anytime offer any way I can sort this? It's impacting massively on his life. He's missing out on lessons cos he has to go clean himself up which takes him ages. I'm wary of him joining clubs etc cos what if he poos?

Thanks for listening

4 Replies

Hi there. I'm just wondering if he really is choosing not to go to the toilet or its just that he genuinely doesn't have the sensation. The bowel obviously stretches because of the constipation and he is probably not getting the signals. I have found that senokot as well as movicol helps my daughter, it helps with the feeling of needing to go.Im sure you've heard about getting them to regularly sit on the toilet after meals ,even if they don't go. School must play their part too, they legally have a duty of care . They should put in place a health care plan and work with you and your son. Don't take no for an answer. Good luck x

Call the Eric helpline. Ask your doctor to refer your son to a continence specialist. Make an individual healthcare plan with the school. Know that there are plenty of others out there dealing with the same issue. It’s not your fault.

Hi I agree with the other two people who have posted. ERIC have been really helpful for us but I think they are flooded with people asking for help so best to phone. It can take a while to get through but keep trying. They are open 10-2 Mon to Thursday. Your son probably isn’t aware of when he needs to poo as the bowel has got stretched which has an impact on the sensation.

Hi, I definitely think you need to push your gp for a referral to a specialist. For us the game changer and when everything started to improve was the introduction of senna. Our doctor at the Evelina hospital said that if the poo is hard then increase the movicol and that if there is poo in his pants then increase the senna. The movicol softens the poo and the senna makes the muscles work better at pushing the whole of the poo out. Using senna for a period of time after a disimpaction will gradually encourage the rectum to go back to a normal size. My son always has a regression going back to school but we have managed to deal with it quicker this time.

Good luck, I too have felt I was going mad at times but I feel we are on the road to things improving now.

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