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Anxiety / Child Psychologist Route

Hi all

Sorry, I havent posted for a while. My daughter is 5 and in Y1 and still is soiling on average once a day. Some weeks are good, some bad. I believe it may be all linked to anxiety and behaviour / psychological issues. She can be very stubborn, and even with bribery, reward charts, or the threat of not going out for the day she very often comes across as not even caring that she has soiled. Its a struggle to get her to even try and push anything out into the toilet. We have tried all of the things the various medical professionals have told us to try. We have a Learning Mentor at our school so she sees her twice a week. They talk about pooing but also feelings etc and play games etc. I am going to ask her to recommend some kind of counsellor or therapist as we dont know where to go from here. Has anyone gone down this route?

7 Replies

Try the Camhs route - it’s a lot of hoops to jump through to get help but hopefully if you keep fighting they can help. We did this for our son but it’s a long road to see improvements. Good luck x


Thank you. I will x


Good luck - the school sound really good having the support there but your instinct is telling you it’s not enough - always trust your instinct. It’s really not an easy route - you have to push to get in with Camhs (your gp can refer or you might be able self refer have a google). When in with them you have to do a lot of hoop jumping but if you keep persisting hopefully you will get the right help. All the best xx


Thank you. So far we have been through paediactric consultant, school nursing team and the continence team. Hoping our school Learning Mentor can help with a referral. From googling looks like you can go direct. x


Yes we had done the same and getting I was getting very, very frustrated as the health professionals weren’t really helping. I thought there must be more to this problem it just didn’t seem to be making any difference and they seem at a lost what to do next really.

Try self referring !! X


Kids as young as 5 may not be able to put their hand up in class and ask to use the toilet. They need to be asked and maybe even accompanied by an adult. It's a part of self regulation and involves a maturity they do not yet possess.

1 like

My daughter has a very supportive TA who asks her to try for a poo at regular intervals throughout the day. We have an intimate care plan put together jointly between the School Nursing Team and the Inclusion Manager which encourages this. When she was in Reception she had a card system to colour meant she wanted to go and try, one meant it was too late.


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