disappointed!: I was signed off work for a... - Endometriosis UK

Endometriosis UK

70,476 members52,060 posts

disappointed!

Mrdarcy profile image
13 Replies

I was signed off work for a few weeks due to my endo causing me alot of discomfort,to cut a long story short i decided to return to work yesterday, work have offered to support me but it appears it has to be what suits them, i found it frustrating that they didnt seem to want to take on board what my capabilities are with regards to work.hence i have been issued a written warning because of my sickness which is all endo related since feb '12.

as i left to go to work today, i had a panic attack and went into complete meltdown i have no idea where it came from, but feel it is probably due to the pressure work are putting on me to return to normal hours.i called work to say i couldnt make it and i was advised by my manager that i should ask myself the question " is this job suitable for me" i couldnt believe what i was hearing ! i have been in this job 5 yrs! all my sickness over the last 2.5 yrs has been endo related.The only thing restricting me at the moment for performing my role at work is endometriosis.I enjoy my job and that was the last thing i needed to hear. has anyone else experienced this

Written by
Mrdarcy profile image
Mrdarcy
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
13 Replies
Lindzl profile image
Lindzl

This has seriously hit home with me! I did the exact same thing this morning. I have been off work for five weeks after a laparoscopy and returned to a 9 hour shift yesterday. I twinged my side last night moving some items and was in pain this morning. I set off for work and then did the exact same thing. I have to have a meeting now on Monday to discuss my 'sickness problems' and I'm dreading it.

Mrdarcy profile image
Mrdarcy in reply to Lindzl

im sorry to hear that,you have my sympathy i wouldnt wish it on anyone.I dont know about you but the endo symptoms and treatment you go through are enough to deal with without anymore added stress. I feeling im fighting a losing battle.

Good luck for monday - do you have a union , i have been advise that i can take someone from the union with me for support. x

Lindzl profile image
Lindzl

I think today was things coming to a bit of a head for me. I think I'm going to play it by ear and see what's said on Monday but I am dreading it. I can understand why its a problem for work - I work in a high pressure office and we're currently shortstaffed so it really doesn't help when I'm off sick randomly. I feel guilty for putting upon colleagues. I don't want to let it beat me tho!

Judging from the comments your boss has made I'd be tempted to take someone in from the union for the support. It's an awful thing to think you can get in trouble for something that is beyond your control. Does your work have any kind of occupational health unit? I'd definitely go through them if they do x

Mrdarcy profile image
Mrdarcy

i also work in a very busy - demanding environment and sadly the odd few have spoilt if for the people who are generally ill and a very strict sickness policy has been implemented.

yes we do have a OH unit and i have an appointment with them at the end of the month but the meeting with HR is on the 10th jan - i was told last night that even if OH and my GP make any recommendations HR do not have to adhere to them if they do not meet the business needs. i feel they have me over a barrel x

ilovemykids profile image
ilovemykids

I really feel for you, I've been off work since Nov endo related, I'm a staff Nurse on an emergency assessment unit. Last year I was in a road traffic accident, well it was not an accident it was maliciously done so they could claim on my insurance,i'd only been in the job 3 mths when it happened (and was off for 21 days) I was already on a 9 mth probationary period as I was newly qualified. In April this year I was off and hospitalised with a urine infection that had also compromised my kidneys. In June HR called a capability meeting were my line manager was present, HR and other disaplines higher up. When I walked into the room the first thing that was said to me by HR,this meeting is being held today to discuss termination of my contract, i was in tears right from that moment! I had brought a colleague with me for support at that time I was not with a union. I was even asked how could I have prevent the illness, I mean come on!!!! still infuriates me now. I had been seen by Occ Health and it was there decision that I was unfit for work but this did not make any difference. My increment got stopped and I was put on a 12 month probationary period, it was explained to me if I had anymore time off my contract would be terminated.

So I have had more time off, I tried so hard to go in every day but on 2 occasions I had to go home due to the pain being so bad, I have encounted people telling me that I should be concerned being such a young women and having so much time off, this alone I can not tell you has put so much stress on me.

I have seen Occ Health again and explained my situation with endo and where I'm up to, she has sent a fax to HR and my manager saying I'm unfit for work on the grounds that it would be unsafe for me to return at present. I explained to her about the first capability meeting and that I would probably end up going to a second, she said all HR were trying to do was scare me and they can not just sack me due to the sickness, she said they have to adhere to rules and regulations and when I do go back they have to make suitable arrangement for me to return. I did feel better knowing this but I'm still worried when I do go back. Hr have also sent a letter which states I'm only entiled to 4 weeks full pay,half pay then ssp so god only knows how I'm going to support my family.

I'm still unable to go back yet as I've been fighting for a lap since nov and have been fobbed off, I've seen the GP today who is now concerned that I have lost 2 stone since Nov as I'm only able to eat once a day due to the pain on eating, opening my bowels and urinating. I've

been telling the hospital since nov that I had lost a stone but no one listened untill today when

the Gp weighed me, she is now faxing the consultant and hopfully I will get the lap I need, last time my bowel was stuck down and I was 3 years without pain after the lap.

Hope you get this sorted and please know that you are not alone, I'm so thankful for this site as everyone on here has been so understanding when I've been having a moan.

x x

Mrdarcy profile image
Mrdarcy in reply to ilovemykids

Thank you, I'm so sorry to hear about your experience, you really have been through it and i almost feel guilty that I haven't had it as bad as some,but it is good to know that there are people you can talk to , It is reassuring to hear I am not alone, and I do feel that they are trying to scare me to get me back to work.even when I am signed off a manager will phone every couple of days for a welfare check! Which I hate , they make you feel so guilty that you are off. I also agree with you in the fact that you can not do anything about having the condition,you didn't choose to get ill! Makes me mad to! I feel today that I can't take any more negativity and hurdles from work and want to shut myself away. Luckily I have an appt with a consultant on the 10th jan she is supposed to be very good so fingers crossed I can get some support and start to move forward it had taken long enough to get the appt I was referred in June 12 !

Hope you feel better soon and I wish you all the best x x

endo_star profile image
endo_star

It might be worth giving ACAS a call and seeing if they can advise.

Mrdarcy profile image
Mrdarcy in reply to endo_star

I have just taken a look at there web site thank you for that , I think I will be giving them a call x x

meme2 profile image
meme2

I really do feel for you. I was off work for three months, in terrible pain the whole time, had a break down and constantly having hospital appointments, then I was called into a meeting and given the sack because they considered I was no longer able to do my job. Unfortunately I was not in a union and was so distressed I just took it and went home. That was 15 years ago and I haven't worked since because of the many treatments and horrendous endo!!!

Oh what I would give for a 'normal' happy family life.

Mrdarcy profile image
Mrdarcy in reply to meme2

So sorry to hear that! That's a terrible shame I understand exactly what you mean though, you do not choose to be ill and it is the condition that prevents you from being able to perform you job . You needed support not to be kicked whilst you were down, that's just so sad. I guess I am lucky in a way that I have a union to support me and ensure that HR follow the policy correctly. I hope your family are looking after you x x

meme2 profile image
meme2

Thank you Mrdarcy. it is always good to share with fellow endo sisters.

I certainly hope your union will give you good support and it will set a precedent for everyone else - that would be really good.

Hope 2013 will be a good year for us all.

Mrdarcy profile image
Mrdarcy in reply to meme2

It is your absolutely right ! I think they will but fingers crossed !

Yes I hope 2013 is kind to us all

Karen x x

Duckybun profile image
Duckybun

Hi ladies, this nights sound ridiculous but I wish I was in your position! I had a lap 2 months ago and have been off work since, I'm self employed, so I have so financial support at all when I'm off sick, I do t work I don't make any money end off.... It petrifies me, funds are running low, I'm still in pain and now have the pressure of having to go out and by t for new contracts that I have to complete on my own with no back up if my pain flares up. I wish I was in a job with the security net of some employment laws to help me through illness.....

You may also like...

Disappointing Gynaecologist

from my first gynaecology appointment that I’ve been waiting 18months for really deflated and could...

disappointed Gyno appointment

I was told my Endo if it’s Endo? Because from the scan & my symptoms that’s what it is indicating

Disappointing gnae referral

don't have been diagnosed and treated for adenomyosis. She suspects endometriosis but also has...

Disappointed gyne apt :(

against me :( I don't know what to do. My boyfriend has private cover through his work so might get...

Refused for laparoscopy Disappointed and sad

for endo. He completely denied all my symptoms and in other words didn't care about the fact endo...