So my partner and I met doing tar Kwon do, we were friends for several years and have been together for the last two. We’ve done different styles of the art and now “do” weights and kickboxing.
Except I haven’t really done much of anything in months, over a year maybe. I was very sick when we finally got together and have been awaiting surgery after surgery since.
I feel like all I do is go to work, come home and maybe clean for 10-20 mins if I’m lucky, then usually it’s sofa with pain or fatigue and cancelling my workout plans, followed by cancelling weekend plans, catching up with friends etc.
My birthday is next month and he just said “I don’t know what to get you you don’t have any hobbies”. It really is salt in the wound as I realised I don’t enjoy anything anymore. It really is work, sleep, repeat (except it’s not like I’m a huge business exec, it’s just enough to keep a roof over my head).
I feel lost.
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Ash24601
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Hmm, sounds to me like he's blurted something out without thinking, like we all do at times. You DO have hobbies as that's what you've described at the start of your post! Unfortunately at the moment it sounds like a hobby you're currently unable to do often due to pain and fatigue. Do you like watching films? Reading books? Birthday present ideas are endless. Perhaps you could write a list and he could pick something from it? Some suggestions I can think of - a voucher for a holistic massage or spa afternoon to help you relax/cope with pain/pamper yourself, a box set of your favourite film director, novels by your fave author or factual books on anything you're interested in. I know dealing with chronic pain is life changing and depressing and frustrating. I'd focus on what brings you some comfort for now xx
I really understand this! I've not been diagnosed, awaiting laparoscopy. But whatever it is comes with a huge amount of fatigue and so I totally get the eat, sleep, work, repeat thing and having little to no energy for weekend plans or being in too much pain. I used to do exercise classes and running and my body reacts so badly now I've had to stop. Thinking about it can make it all feel a bit rubbish can't it. I can hear from what youre saying how frustrating and upsetting it can be. I'm holding out hope that it's not always going to be like this and soon I'll find or be given something that eases things a bit. Then I'm also thinking about adapting things and finding new gentler stuff to do that will hopefully give me a sense of purpose and achievement again. I hope you can talk to your partner about how you feel as it's a lot to shoulder on your own x
Hi Ash, Just wanted to say I read your post and really feel for you! Not sure if it’s any consolation but I feel the same and my partner always complains I’m too tired to get up and do things together on a weekend! That just makes me feel more depressed and inadequate! My job isn’t fun either so it all takes it toll.
I don’t think men understand it at all - my partner is ex army and v active - and I feel like a couch potato these days!
I had endo removed recently and am anaemic due to fibroids that bleed v heavily every month - i’m 5 weeks post lap and feeling very withdrawn and sorry for myself! 🙈
Your posts and the symptoms you describe do sound so challenging - so definitely cut yourself some slack!! Once you get the right medical advice it might hopefully get easier.
I’m going to try and restart Hatha yoga as it’s not too strenuous, I used to enjoy it and is good for mental uplift too.... that might be an idea for you if it appeals?! Thinking of you anyway - I know it’s tough! xx
This is me! I used to do dance and drama but past 3 years i stopped it. My last on stage show at the end i cried because i knew it was my last one and i was 16 at the time but i knew my pain was getting more daily. Now uni is my hobby as sad as that sounds. I cant seem to do anything else. I just lay in bed and read or spend hours abd hours on Instagram and youtube about 10 hours a day i wish it was a joke. I hope you be able to find small little hobbies wether its drawing,reading, walking while listening to music (i always have one bud in rather than two so i can hear my surrondings) but even if its half an hour a day and gradually buold to more physcial if you wanted to go down that road. Yoga maybe? Sorry i dont have much advice but wanted to say youre not alone♡
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it’s great to just hear that someone gets it, keep us updated on how you get on! 
Laparoscopy for endometriosis 
Endo repelling friends..
Referral 
Why is the wait so long !endo hell
