No motivation

Hi, does anyone else get where they have no motivation?

It may be my depression, but I find myself wanting to do things, and never doing them. I'm really bored, so I want to draw, or write, or read (all the things I usually enjoy doing) but part of me doesn't want to. I dislike doing nothing, and I don't want to lie down and have a nap. I want to do something that challenges my mind, but I just have no motivation. So I do end up lying down and carrying on being bored. It makes me fed up. Like I'm fighting against myself. I feel like I've lost interest in everything I normally enjoy. I try to force myself to do something that might interest me, but I quickly become irritated, and go back to doing nothing.

And I know some people complain about being bored. But I mean every day doing the necessary routine of existing. Waiting for the day to pass, just to go back to sleep again. Recently, it's very rare if I show an interest in something.

Thanks

17 Replies

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  • You just put into words exactly how I feel, it's a weird feeling. I don't have the energy to do what I want to do most of the time but when I do, I don't know what to do, nothing seems interesting and I feel like I just want to go to bed but then I go to bed and end up in a horrible mood of anger because I feel pissed off with myself. I think it's giving up on hope, personally I end up thinking what's the point xxxx

  • I tried to reply to your comment last night, but my internet went off.

    I'm the same. I keep going in really foul moods. I get frustrated with myself, but feel like I can't do anything to lift my mood. And I also think what's the point. I feel like I'm just existing from day to day.

    I'm sorry to hear that this is how you feel, but at least I'm not alone. I thought I was going crazy :)

  • This is exactly how I've been feeling recently and it is so frustrating doing nothing but I physically can't, I get too tired all of the time, the whole of my body hurts and daily tasks are an absolute chore because I just don't want to. No energy or motivation sucks :(

    I hope things change for you soon. Feel free to message me whenever! X

  • I get tired easily too. Even when I've not done anything, I'm always tired.

    I'm sorry you feel that way. But yeah thanks, and you too :)

  • Hi Hun it's normal to feel this way with depression let alone everything else you've been going through. Don't be too hard on yourself it will get better. Just remember once you've moved and got the treatment you need you will start to improve. Don't give up you just need time to get your emotional strength back. Things will get better I promise. Thinking of you.

  • Thank you for your support. I just feel like I'm at a loss most days. Like I'm being trapped by myself. It's rubbish. I often feel like I'm my own worst enemy, but I can't do anything to break the cycle of feeling miserable and bored.

    Thank you for your reply :)

  • Hi Hun just remember you've been through a lot. Your dog passing away, this horrible disease , trying to move. Depression, anxiety and stress are you mind and body's way of telling you I can't cope . So please babe don't be so hard on yourself. It takes time but you will get there. I'm here for you if you need me.

  • Thank you for your kind words. It means a lot :)

  • That's ok Hun I mean every word your not alone in this.

  • I believe that this can be just a direct result of the endometriosis rather than any emotional reaction to the illness. The endometrial cells create a chemical called IL-6 which can have mind altering affects. Also, it seems the immune system tries to break down the endometrial cells which causes the tiredness just like when you have flu. Before my hysterectomy I felt like there were things I wanted to do but even when I wasn't too physically tired I just couldn't get my brain to go into action. From what I've read about IL-6 it sounds like that could be the cause. It seemed like my brain was getting part way there but just wasn't quite joining all the bits needed to get things started.

  • That's interesting. I've never heard of that before. I'll have to look it up.

    Thank you for your reply :)

  • Jess, I'm so sorry to read how you're feeling. You've just put into words exactly how I'm feeling. Everything seems a struggle. I said to my husband this morning perhaps we can find an evening class to go to, together, because it's not enough for me, just going shopping a couple of times a week. I play scrabble on my laptop, watch tv and feel as though I'm passing time. I've got knitting I started and can't be bothered to do, partly because arthritis hurts wrists so much, but I feel I need to be doing something and am just left irritable and frustrated and stressed. I think the anxiety that frequently comes with EDS is draining both physically and mentally. I'm on low dose anti depressants and think perhaps I should be on a higher dose as I was a year ago, when I wanted to reduce them, but then I just pass the time in a daze, so as others have said, what's the point. I've got an exercise bike and treadmill to use and most days do a feeble bit of exercise (arthritis prevents too much) and everything I read tells me that lifts spirits but it doesn't mine. I had cancer a couple of years ago and feel ungrateful that I'm fit and well now and not really enjoying life. That just makes me feel guilty! I wish I knew the answer for all of us.

  • I'm sorry you feel this way. It's a frustrating situation to be in. I also play games on my laptop, then feel like I'm just passing time until the next day comes and I do the same thing, and so on.

    And don't feel guilty about that. It sounds like you've had a hard time of it. It's understandable.

    Thank you for your reply. Feel free to message me if you want :)

  • Hi Jess and everyone,

    You have perfectly summed up my days, I spend so long procrastinating about what I'm going to do all day, it ends up being all I do to pass the time. Anti depressants keep me in a daze and oramorph makes me sleep, but when i do have clarity i keep wanting to do something, by the time ive made breakfast or washed up im exhausted again, and back in a sleepy daze in bed, i feel like ive skipped my entire life and hit 80 when im only 25, my partner gets home from work every day to a nutcase starved of human interaction (me) that wants to hear all about his day just to get a slice of life! All he wants to do is sit and relax bless him!

    Its good to know im not the only one xxx

  • I'm exactly the same. I crave human interaction, because it seems easier than making myself do a physical task to keep me interested. But my boyfriend goes to uni, so I have the whole day of trying to keep my mind busy.

    I usually stay in bed till the afternoon, because I don't want to face the day of doing nothing. So getting up earlier makes the day longer and drag. It seems like a rubbish way to live. Just waiting for the day to end, to begin the same thing the next day.

    Thank you for your reply :)

  • I also believe it's a direct effect of endometriosis, the worse the pain and endo has got the more I've sunk into this feeling. I've suffered with anxiety and depression most of my life but feels different to normal. I don't cry all the time like when I've been depressed before. It's like a constant frustration, trying to understand what is going on with your body, accepting that you have an illness that is a daily struggle, lack of understanding from those closest to you, losing jobs, there's so many things that this disease cause that I think our brains go on a kind of shut down, if our interest in life is turned off then the pain etc is easier to deal with but then when odd times of no pain occur our brains can't seem to switch back to being normal if that makes sense. Xxx

  • Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I agree with you. It just seems like something has changed and we can't quite comprehend why, or how to cope with it.

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