Hi everyone! I hope you are all ok and not in too much pain. Sorry it always seems I come on here to ask advice with decisions, but I need your help again
So briefly....I am a professional snowboarder, I had a lap sept.2013, removed deep infiltrating endo from POD and US ligs. Before lap I was in pain 70% of the time, since lap pain way worse and 100%. Missed out on qualifiers for the Olympics after the lap because of the pain:(
They put me on Nortriplyline as they thought it was nerve pain. Came to America for one last season, wanted to go out on a high!! (have to try for a baby on Clomid when i get back in May, cant leave it any longer the gyne said).
Came off Nortriplyline a couple weeks ago as made me feel so dizzy and un-cordinated for snowboarding, was dangerous. Blurred vision etc. Didnt help with the pain anyway.
Been in America snowboarding since mid Jan, the pain has been getting worse and worse. Endo pain back full force, nerve pain, and new pains. Been bleeding out of my bum (im sorry) since January. Constipated, laxitives seem to be the only way I can go!! But now I have this awful pain in the middle of my stomach, up near my rib cage, really sharp. Lost my appetite totally, feel sick all the time, mega bloated (im not pregnant, ive done 3 tests!!)
My boyfriend is with me right now, but he leaves in a weeks time, i was due to stay in America to do 2 more competitions, but will be on my own really
But im struggling so much now, feel like the endo is finally winning. I try and fight it everyday, push through the pain so I can go up the mountain and train. But its getting too much. Im just crying everyday on the mountain as im trying to train due to the pain, trying to seem fine to everyone and smiley and happy, its so hard!!
The only person that knows about my Endo here is my boyfriend. Endo is so far away from the snowboard scene I would never tell anyone. Would never want sponsors etc to find out as they would not be interested in me anymore if they knew about it
So what Im asking is, what should I do???? Stay here, try to push through and do the comps, or give up, let endo win and go home with my boyfriend and get checked out. I could be due a period soon (also have PCO so irregular), so kinda hoping when it comes I feel a bit better and be able to carry on
I have my 2nd lap booked in for the 1st May. Just wanted to "go for it until then", live in my little snowboard bubble where everything is fine!!!
Do you think I should stay and push through it? Or do you think there is something bad going on in there that I need to get checked? I could go to the docs here, but will just be some random that doenst have my history and medical knowledge about Endo. Plus they might want to do tests??? Would be so expensive, I have insurance but its so complicated to claim, esp for endo, and would have to pay up front
I really really dont know what to do. Snowboarding is my life, and its slipping away from me