Here’s to a sober 20s (hopefully)

[Sandpiper14]

Hi guys,

I’ve made the decision to go sober. Like many others, alcohol has never done me any favours. All it’s done is give me 2/3 day long hangovers and cripple me with hangxiety. I also have a family history of alcoholism.

I am in my early 20s and I know navigating life sober at this age may be difficult given the U.K. drinking culture and how socialising is so centred around drink.

I would love to hear other people’s stories and their tips on saying no to alcohol to both yourself and others.

[Healthyguy1]

I think it is a great decision and just take it one day at a time. Try and find something that you enjoy and can swap for your drinking time and friends that have similar interests to help you. For me it was working out but everyone is different. Start small and you got this! Best of luck!

[Sandpiper14 in reply to Healthyguy1]

Thank you so much. I used to love running and I would feel my best self when I did! So now I’m gonna swap hungover Sundays with early mornings getting some miles in!

[Healthyguy1 in reply to Sandpiper14]

That is awesome! Sounds like you have a great plan already. You got this!

[Sandpiper14 in reply to Healthyguy1]

I’m so grateful for the support honestly! I just got to get over a few hurdles (I have a festival planned for the summer) but yep I feel like I might have a handle on it (this time)

[Healthyguy1 in reply to Sandpiper14]

Those hurdles will always be there and all you can do is try your best and understand if you make a mistake it's just that... a mistake. I think you have a great handle on it. Acknowledging is a big part of it and you already are.

[Sandpiper14 in reply to Healthyguy1]

I’m trying to realise that my mistakes don’t define me especially those made under the influence! Thank you so much!

[Healthyguy1 in reply to Sandpiper14]

Thats a fact! Your mistakes don't define you but they will help you learn. Wishing you the best of luck on your journey!

[DicCarlson]

Running and really any exercise can be a great substitute for booze! Become an expert in replacing booze with other drinks and still having fun with your friends! Try kombucha, NA seltzers, NA beers, etc. No one ever on their death bed has said "I wish I hadn't quit drinking!" Alcohol is just a big lie - I will help you have fun - lie, I will help you relax - lie. And the biggest one - you need me! Good luck!

[Sandpiper14]

Thank you so much! I’m deffo going to opt for NA seltzers! I think il just start ordering soda and lime too! thing it will be nice to be able to take every thing in and actually remember how I spent my time in the morning!

[LilyAnnepuppy Ambassador]

Welcome to a sober life. I got sober when I was 28. I’m grateful it happened then. I’ll be 74 next month and an alcohol free life has been beyond my wildest dreams. I was able to do things and go places I’m sure I wouldn’t have experienced while sitting on a bar stool. Or the wasted days recovering from a binge.

I was a blackout drinker. So I don’t remember a lot of what I did. Which in some cases I’m glad.

Alcoholics Anonymous is my treatment of choice. But many others find different paths. Scroll through some of the posts on this forum and see what others have shared.

Be aware that non alcoholic drinks often contain a small percentage of alcohol, which for me, would set off a craving. I’ve heard it said that non alcoholic drinks are for non alcoholics.

Good luck on your journey.

[Sandpiper14 in reply to LilyAnnepuppy]

Hi Lily Anne, thank you for sharing your journey! My issue is with binge drinking so I can go days maybe even weeks without drinking but if I have a plan on the weekend that involves drinking I always take it too far and 9/10x I will blackout. As I said I’m young and vulnerable to alcohol and it scares me to think I could have chunks of a night missing not to mention how dangerous that is! Do you think I’d benefit from AA as someone who binge drinks perhaps 1-2x a month?

[LilyAnnepuppy Ambassador in reply to Sandpiper14]

It’s not how much or how often you drink that is the issue. It’s what the booze does to you when you do. I have a physical allergy to alcohol.

The only requirement for AA membership is a desire to stop drinking. Here’s a link to some online meetings:

aa-intergroup.org/oiaa/meet...

Also, you can go to aa.org for more information on alcoholism. There is literature you can read on the website. Pamphlets. The Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous). The 12&12. There is also an app called “EverythingAA.”

[Sandpiper14 in reply to LilyAnnepuppy]

Thank you so much. I will do my research! Much love.

[SoberDrunk1]

Binge drinkers usually think they have a choice when they drink. That is probably true for many but reality strikes when they don’t want to drink but they can’t stay stopped. They keep picking up. If that is a case you really need to address the issue. And yes, the book AA and the fellowship AA can definitely help understand what alcoholism is really about. It’s a 3 fold illness. Spiritual, mental and physical. When we stop drinking we can’t handle the emotional tantrums the mind plays and then the mind tricks us into believing that we don’t have a problem and we succumb to the desire and then we pick up. There is the 3rd component where once we have alcohol in our body, we want more and more..We call it the craving in AA. There some great stories in the book that you may read and see if you can relate.

[Sandpiper14 in reply to SoberDrunk1]

Thank you so much. Recognising I have a problem is the first step! I’ve also joined the ‘I am sober app’ which is a great space to vent and share experiences with people.

[Smegmer]

Good for you. Alcoholism tends to be progressive, so its good you are recognizing an issue early on in life.

[Sandpiper14 in reply to Smegmer]

Thank you! Given the family history of alcoholism I just know I don’t want to go down that road!