Trying to get family members to understand ho... - COPD Friends

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Trying to get family members to understand how COPD makes you feel.

gingerfeline profile image
18 Replies

I have moderate COPD ,Have just had a bout after getting a virus,steroids cleared it up,i try to tell my daughter if my Granddaughter is unwell cold cough etc,could she wait until she was better before she brought her to see me,she felt I was over reacting,So what am I to do as it made me feel mean,

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gingerfeline profile image
gingerfeline
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18 Replies

Hi difficult. I would give your daughter a straw and tell her to breathe through it. Then tell her this is what you are like when you become ill. This might hit home.

Also look up the 'Spoons theory' as this is another good way of explaing it to those who just don't understand. x

gingerfeline profile image
gingerfeline in reply to

Thank you lilaclil, I' will look up Spoons theory.

stone-UK profile image
stone-UK in reply togingerfeline

Hi

Spoon theory

butyoudontlooksick.com/arti...

Sally001 profile image
Sally001 in reply tostone-UK

Thank you for the Spoon Theory, it was well said.

Sandra1944 profile image
Sandra1944

You did right a bad cold or flu could really be bad for any of us. Just have her talk to your Doctor.

gingerfeline profile image
gingerfeline in reply toSandra1944

Hi Sandra 1944,Thats something she does not seem interested in doing,she says she will just take my word for it,possibly she does not want to know how bad it can get,

Dgtheel profile image
Dgtheel

I'v explained that with my lungs being comprised, I can't be around any one who's sick, what can be a cold for them turns into a serious infect for me, ask her to Google COPD and research for her self.

gingerfeline profile image
gingerfeline in reply toDgtheel

I did suggest that to my daughter,but she said she is not into googling medical stuff and would take my word for it,but that I could pick up something going shopping,

Dgtheel profile image
Dgtheel

That's true, but you probably wouldn't get as close to them as you would your grandbabies, and the germs linger and can infect you days later.

valeriejean profile image
valeriejean

Your daughter is just being protective of her daughter. The real deal is you have to be protective of your health. No one can do that for you but yourself. It is not being mean to take care of yourself. I just dont get how people can not understand something when you tell them...it's like they are viewing it from their perspective and not hearing what is being said. Stand your ground or continue getting sick. The more you get sick, the more it sets up more illness. Maybe put your daughter on a COPD website to educate herself. Give lots of love to your grandaughter when she is well. I am going through my second exerbation in ten years and struggeling to breath , so i hear where you are coming from. good luck, be well, breathe deep and blow it all out.

Why not google something for her and print it off? She would probably read it then.x

Pegstags profile image
Pegstags

I have mild good I believe. Maybe worse. I have 8 grandkids. I've told my kids it's harder on me when I get sick. They just don't understand. So I see the grandkids regardless. I love seeing my grandkids. But if I was in last stage I wouldn't be as nice. But I've not gotten sick from them yet. So I'm not going to say no to seeing my grandkids. Have you got the pneumonia shot? It really helps.

gingerfeline profile image
gingerfeline

My grandchildren are now in there twentys,I have two Greatgrand babies,I caught my last cold from the babyI love seeing my Grandchildren to,my COPD has got worse this year I also get Arrythmias and im on the list for an ablation,I had my pneumonia jab,as i live on my own its not much fun trying to cope when your breathing is bad.

pgood1947 profile image
pgood1947 in reply togingerfeline

Same here but every time I I am with them and they are sick I get it and end up in the ER. Also my husband doesn’t think that it’s the kids who are making me sick. He also thinks I am going to improve from my copd

H2o1511 profile image
H2o1511

Stick to your guns and absolutely make sure you are not exposed. I have experienced this and ended up in the hospital.

Ppl look at us and don't physically see the COPD or how vulnerable we are to colds, flu etc.

Try to find some reading material that she can read and hope she will" get it".

Sending all positive thoughts your way on this problem.

Snop67 profile image
Snop67

I have3 grown daughters they just don’t want to understand. I firmly believe that! Maybe it’s denial on their part

Ibfrostybrew profile image
Ibfrostybrew

My wife doesn't understand as well. I've been going through this flare for 4 months. I keep explaining it's a COPD. It's brutal.

Newfie1 profile image
Newfie1

Hey, I spent a week in the hospital with pneumonia, after my daughter camechome fro. College with some friends, and germs. We're no good to anyone sick, you really need to make it clear how dangerous it is . Protect yourself, your not being mean. I wont even give my husband his morning kiss if he thinks he's been exposed and bleach is used in all common spaces.

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