My dearest, precious, loving Papa has passed and I would like to share this message for all, but especially children and carers of those that have CLL or any other health conditions that please do not use Google and this Forum has really helped me to cope.
When my Papa (Dad) was told he had CLL via a blood test at a&e, I struggled to cope and accept and when referred didnβt find the CLL nurse helpful at all, she was very to the point and was very gloomy about the outcomes of CLL (this was 3+ years ago) the Consultant was so lovely and patient with my Papa and never overwhelmed him, rather encouraged him that his CLL was stable and he must be doing something right.
Though I know my Papa was clued on I always told him any bumps (nodes) were not cancerous yet, thatβs why we needed to go for quarterly check upβs and if Iβm honest this explanation helped me to cope.
My parents have given me so much love and encouragement I feel anything is possible when beside them and though a grown adult at times I have felt so terrified and scared, but found their strength to give them the same love and support in every way possible. I am so grateful that I have been Home beside my parents and I became my Papaβs cheerleader and βpillarβ as he would call me and my devoted Mum his strength in many ways without him even knowing.
My Papa didnβt pass of CLL, but of Heart Failure and it was all unexpected and a bit of a sudden as the only symptoms he had was fluid in his feet and we went to get this checked out and he never came back home with me.
Itβs not even been a month, but I feel lost without my Papa who was my source of comfort, strength, guide and hero and so much more, but I am grateful he passed peacefully.
Sorry if I have gone on a little, but I want to share with you all and please do not rely on internet searches or ask questions and research and use this forum.
If I could moved heaven and earth to save my precious Papa and you all I would, but I all I can do is send you all my love.
Thank you to those of you who have helped me with questions and comments x
π
Written by
ButterflyRose
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I'm sorry to hear of the loss of your Papa. He was lucky to have you and he will have known how much he was loved and cared for which will have helped him to cope with everything.
ο»ΏI'm so sorry for the loss of your Dad. It's so clear from the beautiful and tender words that you have shared with us how very much he is loved and missed.
ο»ΏI'm wishing you comfort and strength in the time ahead.
Thanks for posting about your wonderful papaβs passing. My thoughts are with you, and your mum. Donβt forget you can still come back and βcheck-inβ if you need to. Take care
we fathers have a special bond with our daughters.
I know it from experience.
I've been "dying" in my thoughts enough times, even more so lately, and I seem to mostly think and experience what will happen to my daughter, not so much with my wife (we still have a wonderful relationship).
How will she survive it, will she have enough strength to overcome it.
Your love is immediately apparent.
Be sure that your beloved father (may God forgive him) feels this love, regardless of the fact that he is already very far away (and at the same time so close to you).
During his time, my Papa said to the Nurse βI donβt want my children to sufferβ (as we were unable to help him and to have to see him go) he was truly selfless even on his final days πβ€οΈπ¨π»
ο»ΏI'm so sorry to hear this, your beloved Papa was blessed indeed to have such a devoted daughter fighting his corner for him. I hope you can take comfort, in time, from knowing you did everything possible to support him.
ο»ΏWhat a beautiful, descriptive, adoration full post. I am so saddened to know that you and your family are suffering this loss of such a wonderful man. May your heart & mind find peace soon. It is so tumultuous during a time like this, to say the least. Something you get "through", not over. I am praying for you & your Mum.
ο»ΏI know everyone here, although very sorry for your loss, is appreciative of your gracious post. Sending love & care back to you.
πβ£οΈ Thank you so much for your lovely kind words of support Cookie ππ»
And thank you so much for calling my Papa a βwonderfulβ man πβ€οΈπ¨π» he was and is and I was truly blessed to calm him my Papa πβ€οΈππ»
I am so sorry for your loss ButterflyRose. I send my condolences to you and your family. I know this is a hard time for you. Take comfort in the fact that your Papa is no longer suffering.
Thank you for the beautiful tribute to your father and your love for him.
I am so sorry for you and your family's loss but along with the regret is the feeling of being grateful you had the experience of this special love and bond, which I hope can provide you much comfort and keep your heart warm.
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