Heart failure

I'm not sure whether I'm in the right place or whether anyone can help me here but my husband has severe heart failure, FH, COPD, plus several other problems. He's really struggling at the moment and there doesn't seem any more that the doctors can do. I'm also struggling because I can't bear to see him so I'll and I keep worrying about him dying. Can anyone help me to get through this please?

Thank you. Jan

8 Replies

  • For medical matters you really need to consult a health professional. We can offer opinions and experience here, but there are safety issues.

    Does your husband smoke? Does he drink alcohol? Is he capable of activity? Is he willing to try lifestyle changes? How is he coping?

  • Thank you so much for your reply. Yes, I understand that the professionals are the experts in this and he has had many tests and procedures, including having an ICD fitted. I think my problem at the moment is ME - I've stayed strong over several years now but, just as he needs me even more, I find it so hard. I'm not even sure why I posted this, I just felt I needed to confide in someone. Not got family so quite isolated.


  • Poor you Jan. it is a terrible time for you as you are having to keep strong for your husband but who is there for you? Have you thought about joining a local "Carers Group"? All the people there are going through similar feelings as yourself. Some have long-term problems, others short-term but all of them need support to help them cope on a personal level. I think it is good to know you are not alone and there might be some good ideas from people who can pass on tips from their own experience. Also, there are always Samaritans at the end of a 'phone line., They are not just there to help people feeling suicidal but will always be there to offer a friendly, listening ear. Do keep in touch with the forum to let us know how you are finding ways to cope. Your experience might just help someone else.

  • Thank you so much for your words, it means a lot. I'm normally a very happy, positive person but life has really not been good for several years. I'm sure I'll get back to being myself and the support I've had from here has helped. I'll keep in touch to let you know how it goes. Jan

  • Sending a big cyber hug

  • Ah, thank you, so kind.


  • I have only just joined this site and i feel really sad that i didnt join it sooner. My husband was diagnosed with heart failure in 2013 at the age of 43. We have been together for 28 years and have 3 children. We are devastated as his life has changed dramatically. I have secretly cried many nights worrying about the future and how i would cope without him. I work all the hours i can but really want to be at home with him. Our families get us through the hard times and it has made us realise how important the small things in life are. I searched online for answers and wished I hadnt!! Please dont feel alone. I know exactly what you are going through and the only advice i can give you is to focus on what you have together and make the most of it no matter how long you have. Its time you can never get back and its the time you will look back on the most so make it count!! Love and prayers.x

  • Thank you so much for your kind words..... I really try to be thankful for each day but it's so distressing watching him suffer. When he has a better day, I just enjoy it and try not to worry about how he'll be the following day. I sincerely hope your own husband is able to enjoy life with the family - such a blessing.

    Take lots of care....

    Jan xx

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