These days when I take a deep breath I feel like an instant depression when I exhale. Years ago on the exhale after a deep breath I used to feel rejuvenated, like noting could stop me, a great feeling. Like I was on a journey that would lead to something magical. Its weird and just noticed so thought I'd share.
Tired: These days when I take a deep breath I... - Changing Faces
Tired
Next time you exhale try to reimagine those euphoric feelings & if you practise this action maybe the previous sense of happiness will return?
Let us know how you get on?
Hi Gorgonite, I'm right there with you. It almost feels like part of your soul is wrapped up in your difference. The oppression that comes with being a minority is real. I've found for me, that is what I've needed the most help with in life. It's what I address in therapy and it's what I am able to alleviate when I come here. Here, we aren't minorities. Here, we can express things that others don't experience and can't fully relate to or empathize with. I too have cultivated a deeper sense of spirituality in part because so many of my life experiences were so painful. When I focused on those difficult memories I felt immobile, I didn't want to move and I just wanted to sleep to escape my hurt.. this response manifests as depression. To be honest that is still often my reaction. I just had one of those days last week. The difference now for me is that those bad days don't turn into weeks or months like they used to. They always pass, even when it feels like there is no way that's possible. I believe we just need to find things that inspire us, a new way of thinking, and forgive ourselves for feeling so low. It's really ok because a lowered response to oppression is normal. That doesn't mean it has to stick around though, because change and growth are also quite real, and it's always possible to get to a better place within ourselves.
So to go back to your post, regarding what I assume is a method of meditation for you: the inhaling and exhaling. My practice is a little different.. I inhale the good, the pure, the happiness and the love, and I exhale the bad. I push all that negativity out of me and I don't allow it to take up space inside of me anymore. It's a type of purging.
So on a final note, it's helpful to remember that those good feelings are never outside of you. They are always within you, just waiting for you to return. ❤️