Free for All on Friday: Hi everyone, It's... - Care Community

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Free for All on Friday

Callendersgal profile image

Hi everyone, It's free for all Friday again and I see that, as I've arrived here a little later than usually, BrentW has already treated us to one of his paintings which is particularly lovely today. So please use today to post off-topic if you'd like, just remembering to keep it all within our community guidelines, as always.

It was a recent post that had me thinking about my topic for today. Our proactive, long-term and much liked member secrets22 posted yesterday about a social event which has suddenly woken him up to the fact that, no matter what befalls us in life, we can learn to enjoy aspects of it again.

I think that sociability is something which is so important to us all. I just heard on a news broadcast that a well known supermarket chain is planning to abandon checkout assistants in favour of shopping by 'app' so that no human contact will be necessary. How awful, in my opinion. Another decision based on greed probably and I hope it doesn't backfire on them. We all need a friendly face and some interaction, and for many isolated people a cheery two minute chat with a checkout assistant is all that they get, all day or even all week.

This is especially important to remember if being a carer is making you isolated. It's so hard when you aren't free to leave home when you want, and all too easy to drop contacts with acquaintances (and they with you), and to find the whole business of going out just too much trouble. But what follows from that train of thought is loneliness and possible clinical depression so it's vital to find some way to carry on mixing with people.

My sister pays a carer to sit with her husband while she continues her zumba classes once a week. It's actually funded by her Attendance Allowance and although it eats up most of it, it's a price worth paying for her. And although it's a lot of bother, on fine days, she gets her husband ready to go out and encourages him along to a local shop to pick up a newspaper. He can't see to read, or comprehend the news, but it provides an excuse for their going out together and they quite often meet someone known to one or both of them. I don't doubt that sometimes you might have to be a bit inventive, but it's something well worth doing.

So thanks secrets22 for providing me with today's topic and I truly am so happy for you.

I hope everyone has had a good week in some way or another and that the weekend will bring a little relaxation to you all. Hope this lovely UK autumn weather will linger for a little longer and that it's a good time of year wherever you are.

Photo: Unsplash: michellePpZasSO86os

29 Replies

Hi Callendersgal, I am writing this sitting overlooking our beautiful river in the Autumn sunshine. We have been so lucky with the weather. I agree with you about the importance if human contact. Funnily enough, I have just been standing in line in a supermarket waiting to go through a self checkout as they have reduced the number of checkout operators in the store. The red lights were going off in every direction to ask for assistance with one poor shop assistant looking increasingly harassed trying to address all the problems. I think they should reinstate more checkout operators as it is a very clinical and dehumanising experience in most supermarkets these days.

Most people do want some human connection and I fear we are going in the wrong direction with ordering many things online and self checkouts expanding.

I think your sister is right to carve out some time for herself as caring can he a very lonely and isolating experience. We are social aninaks after all and no matter how much you love someone, we all need to care for ourselves as well.

Sending best wishes to everyone and hoping you have a good weekend. We are planning a trip to the seaside with our 3 year old granddaughter. That will be fun!🍦🌊🌞xxx

That's lovely a day out at the seaside!

Last week we had an unexpected one on the Thursday which I really enjoyed!

Callendersgal profile image
CallendersgalAdministrator in reply to Hellebelle

Nothing like a family trip to the seaside with a toddler for a fun packed outing Hellebelle, and such beautiful weather for one, too! Enjoy! I'm already envious of your sitting out enjoying river views!

Bifield34 profile image
Bifield34 in reply to Hellebelle

I absolutely 100% agree with you. If there is a choice, I always choose the manned checkout as apposed to the self checkout. I think by doing it ourselves, we are taking away jobs and, if they want to encourage people to use them, give a discount because they're saving on employees wages.

Been a bit down this week with job hunting and things piling up and we had a right shock when we got our electricity bill with how much it will be going up from next month as we pay in instalments!

We can manage but it will push lots of people over the edge financially who are already struggling!

Monday we got told that our planned trip for this Saturday has been rearranged and I was disappointed but I understood though so this weekend will be a quiet one here as something else always pops up.

Baby the cat is well and will be following the rest of the family in having her Monday treats cut back and I feel we made the right decision in cutting down on meat as it has cut our grocery bills down!

We had a litter of kittens when we saw the increase in our electricity bill from next month though!

Got interviews next week as well one on the phone on Monday and afternoon ones on Tuesday and Thursday and some the week after as well.

sassy59 profile image
sassy59Ambassador in reply to Catgirl1976

Hope the upcoming interviews go well Catgirl and you enjoy your weekend anyway. Glad Baby is doing well. Many will be struggling and it must be such a worry. Wishing you well. Xxx

Callendersgal profile image
CallendersgalAdministrator in reply to Catgirl1976

Sorry you've been feeling a bit down Catgirl1976, especially as you are so good at keeping positive most of the time, but that goes to prove that we all get the occasional blip! It's true that these are challenging times, especially with finances and I really don't think that the media helps our mood at all by declaring three months ahead that Christmas is ruined! As if Christmas only depends on a turkey! Great to hear that you have more interviews lined up for next week. Even if you aren't successful, it keeps you on your toes, and busy, which is part of the antidote to staying cheerful! Best of luck!

Thing with the media is that they exaggerate!

Christmas will only be ruined if you let it be that way and we decided not to book anything this year as we feel it isn't worth it and is best to save ourselves the heartbreak and not bother same as we had low expectations of the summer which I feel was the right decision to have made and we enjoyed ourselves anyway with the simple things!

We weren't planning on turkey for Christmas anyway and will more than likely have fish but that's not the point!

The media should shut up with their exaggerating as it causes trouble!

sassy59 profile image

Hi Callendersgal, Pete and I have just had lunch in the garden and it was so lovely to get some fresh air and enjoy the butterflies flitting around the plants. I love days like this. I’m not a particularly sociable person to be honest but I love those I love. I have a few friends and brilliant family plus those on the care forum and BLF.

I think it’s great that your sister gets out to do her Zumba class whilst a carer comes in. It’s good for her to do that. Going out together is important too and being inventive is key.

Had a busy week with GP appointments for Pete and a telephone chat for me plus my toe being redressed today. All going well thank goodness but anti coagulant is causing consternation now with the chiropodist ad I’m due to have my other toenail removed next month. I’m sure it will all work out well when the time comes.

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend with good weather. Stay well everyone. Enjoy each day as it comes if possible. Xxx💜❤️💕

Callendersgal profile image
CallendersgalAdministrator in reply to sassy59

I'm quite like you sassy59 with only a few close friends and acquaintances. I sometimes wonder if I'm a bit too fond of my own company to be honest, but like you I do need some companionship. I'm pleased that my sister's kept her Zumba class going. I thought she'd capitulate when her husband, (no longer able to comprehend why she's going), thought she was going out for romantic purposes to meet another man! But she stayed firm and has continued to go and it's really keeping her going and stopping the feeling that all days roll into one. I completely understand your fear of injury when on an anticoagulant as this was one of mine too. I've never felt queasy about blood being taken before but I was a little bit scared the first time I had a blood test after going onto Apixaban. I do think the newer NOACs cause less problems generally than warfarin, and hope that maybe you are on one of those too, as there are mostly much fewer complications connected with them, and I did discover that I could have an injury and not bleed to death. (Ask Kasar about some of that!). Fingers (and toes) crossed that your chiropody goes well. Have a great weekend! 👍🔆💜 xxx

sassy59 profile image
sassy59Ambassador in reply to Callendersgal

We’re quite similar it seems but I’d hate to be completely alone all the time or not seeing anyone else but Pete (lovely though he is). Your sister is definitely doing the right thing. My chiropodist wanted me to be put on Apixaban but I’m taking Rivaroxaban. Thank you for reassuring me and I’ll pass that onto the chiropodist. I’m not too worried if I’m honest. Have a lovely weekend. ❤️💜👍🌞😺xxxx

Catgirl1976 profile image
Catgirl1976 in reply to sassy59

Im on rivaroxaban and they are great as once you have taken them you don't have to worry about them again until the next dose.

I remember back in 2017 just after I had been discharged from the hospital and it had been the work Christmas party in the city centre and I decided I would make an effort and go and see my friends which I did and before I went out I had taken my second anticoagulant dose as after a clot it is 15mg twice a day with rivaroxaban for 3 weeks and then 20mg once a day after.

I feel its important that you have to live your life and not use a health condition as an excuse not to do things when you can do them but won't.

sassy59 profile image
sassy59Ambassador in reply to Catgirl1976

Yes I agree Catgirl, life goes on and I’m finding Rivaroxaban fine so far. I have Atrial Fibrillation and taking a pill once a day is great. Enjoy your weekend. Xxx

The modern anticoagulants are great aren't they and let you get on with living your life unlike warfarin which is a pain with the inr checks.

Been out for a nice walk round the neighbourhood just now and feel a lot better about things and have come to accept it's one of those things that's beyond my control that I can't change but I can do something about my behaviour and my attitude towards these things though.

Callendersgal profile image
CallendersgalAdministrator in reply to Catgirl1976

They really are Catgirl976 and I was so happy to be prescribed Apixaban as I somehow did have a horror of sharing a treatment (warfarin) which was initially formulated to kill rats! I was still nervous at the beginning, but it's been completely trouble free and the only thing I have to do is to keep a twice daily alarm on my phone so I keep doses regularly 12 hours apart and don't forget to take one. I'd read all of the scare stories about 'no antidote' to the new anticoagulants, but a) one has been developed now and b) as you doubtless know, NOACs are very short acting, and are quickly out of your system if you stop taking them. But it is really understandable to be facing treatments while taking them. I still have to face my dentist for the first time and that's not something I relish, but I'm sure all will be well, just as with sassy59's podiatry!

Good luck with all your interviews. Even if you aren't successful, it's all good experience. I hope that you manage to get something you will enjoy.

I think lots of people are going to struggle financially, especially as we head into winter. Alternative sources of heat need to be found asap. The annoying thing is that the government has known about this for years. It's crisis management at its worst as it will effect vulnerable and less well off people the most.

Thankyou Callendersgal for those kind words.As for shopping i avoid even those self serve checkouts,i cant stand them,and also if we become assistant free just think how many will be put out of work,and i also rail against going cashless,of course i do use a card but not all the time,and if we stop using cash completely we wont be seeing money again as we know it.

Oddly when using cash i am much more aware of what i'm spending,but using a card one could soon overspend.

We use cash for small purchases here as it helps us keep track on our money.

Im furious today to say the least. My boiler started leaking on thursday . dad came round & I showed him where the water was coming from & he turned it off at the mains . He phoned the plumber we use who installed it & he was on a big job & said he d try to come on the thursday & never showed (or texted mum & dad to say he couldnt come& also so said it may not be while Monday before he was able to come out .When I went to mums for lunch & asked if theyd heard from him dad piped up oh hes watching golf today which annoyed me & I said to him -talk about not getting priorities right .

I have been FORCED!!!! to spend Thursday & got to spend Friday saturday & Sunday & Im probably guessing Monday aswell WITHOUT ANY CENTRAL HEATING!!!!! The only things heating my house is 1 plug in heater in the lounge & 1 plug in heater in the hall. The rest of the house is like like Alaska (bloomin cold)!!!!

This is going to have an adverse effect on my lungs considering Ive got interstitial lung disease & although I've ahd the pheumonia jab - probably pheumonia as well because of him & because of the boiler

Ive had to resort to asking mum to do my washing for me (something I NEVER ask her to do)

So at the moment Im living in a hellhole

then this morning (friday -) my instructor cancelled my first ride out since id come out of hospital at the 11th hour

Its always the way isn't it how everything goes wrong at the same time!

& always to me

Callendersgal profile image

That was certainly a bad end to your week Sara_2611. So annoying when a tradesman lets you down. I hope you are soon able to warm up again.

Years ago i was working in a kitchen and cook had been expecting some furniture to have been delivered to her home and her husband had waited in but they never turned up and it had been the second time they had done this and cook had burst into tears of frustration!

It is extremely frustrating isn't it when people say they are going to do things and are full of promises and then it never happens!

me too otherwise i could end up with pheumonia even though ive had the jab

I had a great week. At Sainsbury's yesterday I spoke in French and met a friend too. In other news Milo was neutered on Thursday morning around eleven am so hopefully no more unwanted humping.

How are you and Milo getting on?

Baby is fine and getting spoilt!

Callendersgal profile image
CallendersgalAdministrator in reply to thara9643

Bien fait thara 9643! Always good to be able to practice on other people! Good news about Milo. I'm sure he'll becefit from this as well as make him more socially acceptable.

Hopefully. Sorry I went away for the weekend. And yes. He is still sore and in pain however.

Callendersgal profile image
CallendersgalAdministrator in reply to thara9643

Hope you enjoyed your weekend! Poor Milo, I hope he feels better soon. Happily animals often seem to feel better more quickly after surgery than we humans!

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