the end is nigh: Well we had a meeting with... - Care Community

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the end is nigh

tobby1428 profile image
9 Replies

Well we had a meeting with the surgeon and the oncologist and its all down hill.The surgeon had mentioned that chemo would reduce the cancer in my liver allowing them to operate on my colon.When we saw the oncologist he said I would not manage chemo and I should just go home and consider getting in touch with macmillan nurses.We have asked for a second opinion and also asked for a telephone consultation with the surgeon,as it appears that the oncologist thinks we are under the impression that chemo would cure everything.The oncologist is talking about MONTHS I do not feel ill or unwell.Right on time for Christmas,good old NHS,nothing like putting the boot in! My whole family are devastated and do not know what to do or say.Yes I am 66 years old,overweight,limited mobility and cannot do much for myself ,but I get the feeling that I am of no value to soceity,even though I worked full time for over 30 years paying full tax and NI.Our children were even adopted without any help from the State,I still pay tax on my pension,full council tax and vat for what? I will probably die soon of a broken heart if not cancer.

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tobby1428
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9 Replies
sassy59 profile image
sassy59

I’m so very sorry to hear your news. You must be so completely devastated. Not a bad idea to get a second opinion and speak to the surgeon. Please let us know how things go and I’m sending very best wishes to you and your family. Xxxxx

This is just horrible news to receive at any time tobby1428, and it must be extra raw, receiving it at this time of the year. Please do get that second opinion and of course you don't have to give up your fight with this horrible disease.I know it's really hard to think straight or to know what to say to your family and others so I really would urge you to get some help from McMillan nurses. They have to deal with this sort of situation every single day and I'm sure will be able to help you with the different emotions you are going through.

As sassy59's said, please keep in touch and let us know how things are going. Sending my warmest best wishes too and thinking of you at this really difficult time.

Daisy55 profile image
Daisy55

If you have a local hospice , it would be such a support and help to you in so many ways . The McMillan nurses can guide you too . Hospices are about living your days to the best you can , well being , support . We have found ours wonderful x

tobby1428 profile image
tobby1428 in reply toDaisy55

ours shut 2 years ago as they could not raise enough money.the next hospice is 15 miles away,none of my family would be able to get there.

Daisy55 profile image
Daisy55 in reply totobby1428

They can have nurses come to you in the community , it is always worth enquiring , if you cannot get to them x

starveycat profile image
starveycat

Someone close to me had cancer. Had surgery then told needed chemo. They cut out all sugar, meat, dairy processed food from their diet. Said they would need palliative care the following year. Now eat a vegan diet. No processed food and back at work. Just s thought. Gentle hugs

katieoxo60 profile image
katieoxo60

Sorry to hear your sad news , my family are in the same boat, offered no treatment sent home to talk to macmillan nurses so sad at Christmas time, but no option apparently. Another member of family is getting Chemo but his spine cancer is inoperable. All I can say is my thoughts go with you and take each day as it comes till your second opinion is done. You still have a ray of hope every best wish for good outcome on second opinion.

tobby1428 profile image
tobby1428 in reply tokatieoxo60

thank you katie

Oshgosh profile image
Oshgosh

Thinking of you.Please try to have a decent Christmas

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