Two monks walking across country to their monastery reached a river where they met a young woman. She was wary of the current, and asked if they could carry her across. One of them hesitated, but the other quickly picked her up onto his shoulders, carriedher across, and set her down. She thanked him and departed.
As the monks continued on their way, the other one was brooding andpreoccupied. Eventually he said, "Brother, our training teaches us to avoid any contact with women, but you picked that one up on your shoulders and carried her!"
"Brother," the second monk replied, "I set her down on the other side, whileyou are still carrying her."
It's true. We do end up carrying around lots of things in our heads that would make life lighter if we just put them down. Old resentments from the past, and worrying about things that might not even come to pass, or that will have outcomes we have no control over.
When you are stressed with care-giving, as well as having to deal with your own busy life, it's really good to stop for a moment and think about the things you can let go, even if that's just for now. Only pick them up again if you find you really need to.
Ooh spooky, a well timed reminder. Is there another tale of how this dog with a bone can let it go? Some upsets do seem to get me hooked. Not very zen hey?
Hi Al10, Glad the reminder was timely! The thing is, it's easy to tell the story and quite another to just let it all go. Luckily I seem to have been born under a very relaxed star and I usually get accused of being far too laid back. I also meditate which is great for clearing your mind.
But we're all human and most of us do tend to end up carrying a lot of baggage around with us unnecessarily, so it's more about stopping to remember to put the shopping bags down and take a rest when we need to. We'd do it with physically heavy shopping, it's the mental stuff we find so hard to set down.
But... you asked for another story, so here's another which is as much to, hopefully, make you smile as help you let go.
THE VOW OF SILENCE
There was once a Zen monastery that was very strict. Following a vow of silence, no one was allowed to speak at all. But there was one exception to this rule. Every ten years, the monks were permitted to speak just two words. After spending his first ten years at the monastery, one monk went to the head monk. "It has been ten years," said the head monk. "What are the two words you would like to say?"
"Bed... hard..." said the monk.
"I see," replied the head monk.
Ten years later, the monk returned to the head monk's office. "It has been ten more years," said the head monk. "What are the two words you would like to say?"
"Food... stinks..." said the monk.
"I see," replied the head monk.
Yet another ten years passed and the monk once again met with the head monk who asked, "What are your two words now, after these ten years?"
"I quit!" said the monk.
"Well, I can see why," replied the head monk. "All you ever do is complain."
This is a humorous story, but it does demonstrate how long and ridiculously we can cling on to things we could easily let go of.
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
A word of praise for our NHS and social services
CARER GUILT
End of Dementia Journey
A true story of devotion and love.
