When you can’t go on

The pressures of caring are immense. They come from all sides – the physical strain of pushing a wheelchair, hoisting from one chair to another, picking them up after a fall. Or the mental frustration of life with someone who can’t remember what happened moments ago, or whose personality has been overshadowed as dementia takes hold. As a carer, you adjust to new pressures each day. Until you just can’t take any more and feel like you can’t go on.

If you have ever thought ‘I just want my normal life back!’, how did you keep going? Did you take a holiday? Or introduce new routines or activities into your lives? Share your wisdom and experience with members of the Forum. It could be just the thing that saves their sanity.

Best wishes,

Simplyhealth Care for Life team

[jaykay777]

At 83 I had felt like I couldn't go on after three years of caring for my husband who was six years younger, 10 inches taller and 60 pounds heavier than I am. I was grateful that he maintain a loving attitude toward me. I was resigned to the possibility that I would have a stroke or heart attack and die first. Fortunately, his hospice team took over and initiated the paperwork to place him in a nursing home. All I had to do was supply documents and sign papers. I was relieved that he could get the care he deserved. If you feel like you can't go on, you probably can't. Talk with a social worker and get help.

[jaykay777]

I'm sorry to hear about the cuts in the UK. Our new president is cutting funding to programs that provide health care to the elderly. I am old -- 85 -- but have good health insurance to cover my present needs.

[Bonner2903]

We are caring for old parents 89 & 90 who both have dementia, who are so stubborn, and resisting carers, dad keeps falling, is now in hospital they won't let him out until we have careers in place, which we are finding really difficult to find. We have tried various local homes for respite care but again we are facing a brick wall unless we want to pay £1000 a week for a minimum of 4 weeks.

We live nr Gravesend in Kent, Any suggestions on how to find careers in our area?

[von60 in reply to Bonner2903]

This is sad, where are the people who should help you....