Hi, I'm new to this community. I just took on the overwhelming role as primary caregiver to my mother, age 82, with Dementia. My husband, daughter and I moved in with my mom mid-January, so it's only been a couple of weeks. We have quickly gotten into a routine and we each have our jobs to do for my mother. It all seems to be working very well for us and I'm actually enjoying this extra time with my mom. My daughter has really surprised us at how eager she is to help her "Nana" with anything and everything we ask her to do, which is highly unusual for most 12 year old girls, in my opinion. And, my husband has been wonderful at taking care of all of "his ladies" in the household. He cooks, cleans, does laundry, takes out the trash, practically any and every thing he can to make our lives easier. He has already even encouraged me to have dinner one evening with my girl friends and I went and didn't have one hint of guilty feelings for going because he supported my time away from the house and was there for my mom while I was away a few hours.
My biggest issue is that I have 3 older brothers, 2 sister-in-laws, 2 grown nieces, and 2 grown nephews that RARELY visit or even call my mother. All of these people but two of them, live in our same county, so not but a few minutes away from her. And, I know she has Dementia, and some days are worse than others, but for the most part she is still very aware of what's going on around her and she definitely notices that we are the only people in her life that are still around. I don't need recognition for taking care of her at all because I wouldn't trade this time with her for anything, but I do think her other children and her grandchildren should at least visit or call every now and then. It seems to me that because she is "sick" that they don't want to be around her or feel as if she won't know whether or not they have been to visit or called...BUT I KNOW! Or maybe they think if they come around, we might ask for them to sit with her while we have some time away...which we wouldn't at this point anyway. My heart really hurts for her and the last thing I want is for her to feel like a burden or unloved by her family. I just wish they would make contact with her. I know it would make her happy, even if she didn't remember later on, at lease for that moment in time. Any suggestions, besides calling or texting them?...which at this time, would not be a good thing. I'm very angry with them right now.