Husband finally in hospital

[Oreo10]

Hi all, I posted a few days ago about my husband who was diagnosed with liver disease about four years ago, he continued to drink around 8 cans of lager a night. He got quite ill over the Christmas with swollen stomach and legs. Itching so much that he bleeds and not getting around well on swollen ankles. He kept putting off going to the doctor and my worry is sky high. I finally got him to go to A&E yesterday afternoon, bedlam there with flu patients etc so hasn’t even got a bed yet. Went to see him this evening and he seemed confused some of the time and said that he felt a bit unsteady on his feet. Told the nurse all this. He is on diuretics and Lithium and will be admitted when a bed becomes available. No doctor there at the time to speak to. I think he looks a bit yellow but can’t be sure. White of eyes still look white. He has sores on his legs too. So so worried as he is such a good man just can’t kick the alcohol and hoping he can come through this. He is hurting no-one except himself and, of course, the worry of myself and our three teenage daughters.

[Dinah48]

hello I don’t have any real advice but wanted to say that I could almost have written your post, our situations are so similar.

What I have found with my husband‘s cirrhosis is that it is a lot of ups and downs with his condition. He is prone to infections, one of which recently has required a hospital visit. The other conditions that I’m sure you will have seen pop up now and then.

I no longer focus on his drinking because I recognise that it’s his choice. I’m there to support him and enjoy when times are good. I now take better care of myself coping with the situation because it does have an impact. Al Anon helps immensely. I hope you are ok and please take care of yourself and your girls.

[Oreo10 in reply to Dinah48]

Thank you so much for your reply. My husband is now going through the detox stage in hospital but is trying to leave and keeps phoning me to collect him. He is getting agitated, which is so unlike him, and is insisting that the medication is affecting him. I am at my wits end as I do feel his pain but at the same time he would be signing his death sentence by leaving. Feeling lost.

[Dinah48 in reply to Oreo10]

have You tried Al Anon? There are online sessions too where you could try anonymously. I did not get it at first but nearly a year in I am definitely feeling the benefit. Also makes you feel less alone.

[Crimsoon]

Hello, we went through the same back in June 2024, my husand had a detox and suffered delirium tremens. I dont want to scare you but my husband sended up in ICU.

After three weeks of uncertainty he did pull through. I Felt as if I left hospital with a different man. He couldnt remember a second of what happened to him yet my children and I remember every second. It was heartbreaking.

The next six months were different he stopped drinking and his liver has stabilised. He has been amazing.

Please take care of yourself and your girls. Eat properly and try to get some rest.

We love our men... at times people cant understand this... we are married to good men who drink.

Wishing you all the very best.

[Dinah48 in reply to Crimsoon]

I agree - people don’t understand. I’ve had people ask why I stay. It’s a choice of course and lots of other factors play in, but being able to put my own care first took years and helps immensely in the whole situation.