From the mouth of a GP: Along with... - British Liver Trust

British Liver Trust

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From the mouth of a GP

Wordesley profile image
31 Replies

Along with female friends of the same sort of age, I've long thought that women over 60 tend to get shunted aside by the medical profession. And I've just had it confirmed!

I've had a swelling on the side of my face in front of the ear for several months. I've done all the home remedies and OTC medications. I've had my dental check-up and an x-ray which was clear, I've had my optician check-up which was clear and spoken to the pharmacist. With nothing else left to do I saw the GP. No idea what it is as ear and nose clear, so prescribed anti-biotics and when they didn't work prescribed 2 courses of nose sprays. Still not working so back to GP as lump is getting bigger and took husband with me. He asked the GP about a referral for diagnosis and the reply...."well, we can't refer everyone can we". So I told him that I felt that if you're female and over 60 you become invisible and he said "I can't disagree with you".

So there you have it, from the mouth of a GP

31 Replies
Fibro2021 profile image

My friend had similar symptoms. They did an ultrasound of the parotid salivary gland and found stones in the ducts due to which the salivary gland increased in size and caused swelling. It seems to be correctly called sialolithiasis. He was treated by a maxillofacial surgeon in a private dental clinic.

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Fibro2021

This is exactly what my District nurse friend said it could be, and it was when I mentioned it and hubby asked for the referral that he said that they couldn't refer everyone 😡

Livaa profile image
Livaa in reply to Fibro2021

Find new medical practitioners. I’m 16 and I refuse to believe that you and I and everybody else our age are important! Treat yourself like royalty.

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Livaa

I would love to register with another practice but, unfortunately, in the UK you have to go with the surgery that covers your area, and as we are rural there is only the one I'm stuck

Fibro2021 profile image
Fibro2021 in reply to Wordesley

I think that the inaction of your doctor in relation to your health may be a reason to contact a higher health authority.

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Fibro2021

I joined a health scheme in March, so if I can't get a referral to an NHS consultant I'll ask for a private one in September. I know that if I complain to the surgery I'll be removed from the list and we don't have another practice in the area.

Hey___ profile image
Hey___ in reply to Fibro2021

Hey Fibro2021...Contacting a higher health authority is what I believe too. I am going to put a post on soon that involves two incidences. One from a GP and one from a Psychiatrist. It happened to me last year and to this day I am still resentful and TBH..angry. Best wishes...Mark

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Hey___

I'm sorry to hear you've also had bad treatment Mark, I hope you are recovering well now x

Hey___ profile image
Hey___ in reply to Wordesley

Hey Wordesley...Well the truth is that there are really good doctors out there who are there to do a really important job. But there are the others... and it's the luck of the draw and how you react to such obserdities?!Doctors study and train hard to become the professionals they are but in this vast accumulation of knowledge, maybe a one day topic on 'bedside manner' should be introduced. But maybe it already is?! Yeh I am recovering well, mainly, but I have 3 doctor's visits coming up and who knows?!...The Good, the Bad or the Ugly?!...Take good care of yourself....Mark x

Louby1954 profile image
Louby1954 in reply to Wordesley

You can choose whatever dr you want whatever area is good for you. Providing they have rooms on their books they. Are obliged to accept youI had this live in little village one dr one surgery a nurse had to wait 3 months for a vacancy. Not too long thank goodness. If not report them to ccq

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Louby1954

Thanks, I'll look into that, I know there is another practice outside of our area about 8miles away

Bikafella profile image
Bikafella in reply to Wordesley

I understand you can change GP's but it's a problem if you've been closed as a troublesome or time-wasting individual (don't ask me to define- I'm talking in general) .

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Bikafella

Apparently the criteria is that you have to register with the surgery(ies) covering your area (we only have the one), unless it is impossible for you to access the surgery during working hours. So, for instance if you work some distance away, you could register with a surgery near to your workplace if they have vacancies.

Dobielove profile image
Dobielove in reply to Fibro2021

Hi Fibro2021 I feel your pain our GP nearly killed my Husband back 2017 treated him for a compacted bowel when in fact he had 2 massive blood clots on each lung and pneumonia and I was told by A&E Doctor that if I hadn’t rung 999 that night I would of awoke next to corpse all this is despite our Nurse doing a home visit that day as he couldn’t breathe and was double over in pain and she just prescribed more pain killers and laxatives🤬. He spent the 2 weeks in ICU Only advise I can give you is ring your local PAL Patient Advice and Liaison Service and they will get it sorted and but in a complaint about your GP thats discrimination

Hope you get the treatment you deserve Good Luck ❤️😘xxx

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Dobielove

OMG, I hope your husband recovered well. I'm going to have to wait till September and then go through Benenden and see if I can get a private referral/scan. I can't make a complaint as there is only one practice in the area and they have removed patients previously for complaining.

Dobielove profile image
Dobielove in reply to Wordesley

Yes it took over 2 years for his lungs to recover then last year he’s been diagnosed with cirrhosis 🤦🏻‍♀️ I would still get in touch with PAL they are there for this sort of thing my Mam used them when she had her replacement knees as they found something wrong with her blood she was very anaemic and they didn’t know why she had 8 premeds but no operation, she got in touch with PAL and she was in the next week operation done and then had her another done 4 weeks later.Good Luck Deb…x

bantam12 profile image

Being female and over 60 is definitely a disadvantage when it comes to treatment, we are no longer worth spending the budget on !

Livaa profile image
Livaa in reply to bantam12

Bull doodoo

bantam12 profile image
bantam12 in reply to Livaa

Why 🤔

pigeonCl-HU profile image
pigeonCl-HU in reply to Livaa

Why ?

Positive001 profile image

Thanks for the heads up. I don't even have a GP anymore. The only people at our surgery seem to be nurses. No GPs there since the pandemic only a locum. I turned 60 last month so God help me if l get ill, guess it will be another £95 30 minute private appointment. Hubby only deals with the hospital and gets well looked after there,our surgery is a waste of space. The area would be of more use as another dried up duck pond !

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Positive001

Same as our surgery...when you go in the only people waiting are those seeing the nurses for blood tests and dressing changes. We joined a health scheme in March which gives immediate access 24/7 to a GP and advice, and after 6 months fast access to private diagnostics and treatments. They don't cover all treatments, but as it's only £24pm for both of us I think it's worth it in this day and age. Roll on September if I need to go for a private scan

LemonMeringue15 profile image

I had facial pain which I had figured out was trigeminal neuralgia after the dentist had ruled out dental issues. I'd seen the GP a few times who was very offhand and said he'd had it as a teen and it went after a few weeks (very unlikely). I saw the NICE guidelines advised an MRI if you had TN and were under 40. I took my boyfriend as I was in too much pain to advocate for myself. He told us 'well scans are for those with serious problems'.He did end up referring me and that scan and other tests led me to being diagnosed with MS. TN is an early symptom in some people, hence the need for MRI

I left that surgery soon after. Best move I made.

Keep pushing and go to PALS if you aren't happy with your treatment.

Bs1524 profile image

Why not say you are self identifying as male and demand a referral. I have actually found the opposite with my GP she refers for anything mind you they are still not doing face to face appointments

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Bs1524

🤣🤣 Never thought of that🤣

Positive001 profile image
Positive001 in reply to Bs1524

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Pam that's brilliant x

Robert1220 profile image

That's shocking!

Confused01 profile image

This is not acceptable . Firstly see another GP in the practice, be straight and tell them you need a referral, if you don’t get that you need to complain directly to your CCG , importantly not direct to the GP as they will bin your complaint.

There’s a big thing going on now about women getting poorer treatment than men. I’ve experienced it several times when my partner has the same spine issue as me. He got good treatment within months…10 years down the line and I still haven’t had the same (I do know 100% appropriate for both of us).

GP’s need to learn that they can’t get away with this attitude and money should not be their priority. Referring you doesn’t cost a fortune anyway!

I hope you get sorted x

Wordesley profile image
Wordesley in reply to Confused01

I'm sorry to hear you've been side-lined for so long.... but I know exactly what you mean. My husband fell down the stairs and hurt his knee and shoulder. He's had 2 MRI's, and 2 referrals with a choice of hospital. He has already seen someone face to face about his knee and has a face to face appointment with a different consultant later this month. All since the beginning of the year.

I had to push for a referral after a bad liver Fibroscan in February, got the referral in April and I had a telephone appointment come through for October, which has now been pulled back to August. I later had a referral (again after pushing for it) as I have gallstones. I have had a letter stating that I am on a waiting list for an outpatients appointment but without any timescale, and not to call them as an appointment will be sent when I get to the top of the list!

I wouldn't mind but I hadn't been to the GP for years before this year, it's not like I'm always there

oap74 profile image

What a breath of fresh air to read your post and all the comments we are all in the same boat. Last Saturday I noticed a blotch on my chest the size of a 10 pence piece so thought eConsult took a photo which is not easy at my age. Went to eConsult surprise surprise not available out of surgery hours why? Monday morning eConsult fill it all in with photo, can’t make a diagnosis need to talk to someone today doesn’t say who. In other words don’t bother us, unbelievable. Went to Boots and asked the pharmacist for his opinion couldn’t be more helpful asked a few questions told me that he doesn’t think it’s cancerous it should go within a couple of weeks. It’s now gone. What are these doctors doing? So to sum up if you think it’s bad at 60 it’s worse in your 70s. All the best

Louby1954 profile image

Precisely I took my partner with me to. See rheumatologist once got him past the guard on door had a 40 minute appointment so wrong that in this day & age it happens. All my questions I gave him he answered. Usually get 5 minutes if I am lucky. See what he has to see him at my annual appointment in September. Again my partner will come in two ears & mouths are better than one. Just had biopsy on liver. Again my partner stayed with me all day & follow up appointment re liver he will be with me again

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