Why do I have to give my medical history to justify my order.
Me: I'll have a sparkling water, the salmon with steamed veg and a side salad with dressing on the side please and may I ask that no additional salt be used when preparing my meal.
Pesky 20 something knob: Oh, somebody is on a diet. Can I bring you a sneaky glass of wine it's $4.00 Wednesday on red white and even beer.
Me: No thank you I don't drink. Just the sparkling water please.
Pesky: Not even a spriter? How about a light beer?
Me: I'm a mormon. No booze. (I'm not )
Pesky knob: So on the salt I'm guessing it's a kidney thing? I'll put kidney disease in capitals so they notice.
Me (fuming): I don't see why my medical condition is relevant to the chef, he should just be able to honour my request as I am the customer and all but for the sake of accuracy I am on anti-viral medication as I'm having an unholy herpes outbreak, worst in decades, can hardly bear sitting due to the runny blisters and itching to be honest so if you wouldn't mind putting our order in I'd be very appreciative. But as you seem to have a keen interest in your customer's health excess salt makes the herpes blisters swell and burst.
The meal was lovely.....never asked if we wanted dessert, shame really as I was well primed to launch into my history of diabetes and how one toe was gangrenous and due to be amputated next week from eating too many desserts.