Hello you lovely people. I'm here in desperation. My dear friend who is also grandmother to my grand children she is my daughter-in-law's mother so we are family. For years she has had alcohol problems and we have learnt how to live with it as a family, but a few weeks ago she became very distant. We share the school run with our grandchildren and she suddenly stopped and became very reclusive. She wouldn't see anybody and she hid Herself away. My daughter-in-law was unable to get in to see her she wouldn't let her in . Then last week it all came to a head and my daughter-in-law managed to get in to see her and was very shocked. Her weight has plummeted stomach was very bloated and her eyes jaundiced and her skin was yellow. She is now in hospital she has been pooing blood which is like black tar is unable to eat and very difficult to deal with, as she is very impatient and she has very limited concentration at the moment. I am trying to liaise with doctors and nurses because she is very difficult and I am the only one that she will allow to help because I suppose we are buddies being Joint grandmothers. I fear she is in very late stages of this terrible disease. Is there any going back from this? That is the question I suppose I'm asking. Can there be any help at this stage ? Looking at all the evidence I fear that she May be in late stage liver failure and her body is now shutting down. She can't eat she only nibbles maybe a biscuit at the most. The consultant is seeing her this morning and I am fearing the worst is anyone out there who has been at this stage that has improved at this stage? Any help any advice would really help. It's so difficult because she is confused and loses track of what she saying quite quickly and I'm trying to help but I really don't know what to say to her anymore . I'm trying to be really gentle and compassionate with her and just Hold her hand cuddle her and we chat, or should I say she chats. She will not accept the drinking is why she is in hospital she thinks she has infection in her poo. I saw her poo last night and it was just like black tar and she's pooing yet she's not eating. Just wondering if anyone out there could help me. Do you think it's possible at this stage that they can improve her health to the point where her liver starts functioning properly again? Love and blessings to everyone
im new , late stage liver sclerosis - British Liver Trust
im new , late stage liver sclerosis
Hi pluggy sorry to hear about your friend/family member. I was in hospital four years ago with exactly the same symptoms I had a stent fitted in my liver and I carried on for another 3 years until I got to poorly and I had a transplant a year ago. Everyone is different though. I am not sure if her liver will recover that will take lifestyle changes and hard work on her part but it is possible. The consultant will fill you in, but they may not be able to give you the answer straight away as it is going to take time to see a difference x
None of us here are medical professionals but from experience and learned knowledge it is sadly obvious that your friend is very seriously poorly and showing many of the symptoms of advanced and decompensated cirrhosis/sclerosis. Her liver is currently really struggling, she obviously has ascites, internal bleeding at present, bilirubin build up leading to jaundice and signs of Hepatic Encephalopathy and unless doctors can get any of these in check the prognosis isn't very great. Sadly her blood tests will be all over the place and at this stage many of her other organs will now be struggling.
We have seen some very rare cases on here of people who have been at this level of illness and recovered to some degree, however, without sounding too gloomy I would perhaps prepare yourself that it might go the other way. She is going to require a lot of medical intervention with medicines, probably blood transfusions and procedures (endoscopy / colonoscopy) to check what's going on with the bleeding & deal with that, she might need her ascites draining. She is very poorly.
For more information on cirrhosis check out the British Liver Trust page at:- britishlivertrust.org.uk/li...
Look after yourself in all this too because it will be draining.
All the best, Katie
Hi Katie,
Is the black poo bleeding? I know she also poos red blood as well. I'm going to see her shortly. Just sat a loss of what to say when she says..." I'm not staying in here, I'm going home" . She signed herself out yesterday and went to my sons house straight from the hospital in her nightie. It took hours to get her back, she kept on ranting about this nurse and that nurse.etc... I stayed with her at the hospital until she got settled into a different ward, but I know that before long there will be more complaints as she is getting really impatient and ratty..I convinced her to take the diazepam that had previously been prescribed, which she had refused, so hopefully today she might be less agitated.
It's my daughter in law who I worry about.
She has lived her who life with an alcoholic mum who has refused help.
Love and hugs
Yes the black tarry poo is a sign she is bleeding internally.
Thankyou ayrshireK
It's not looking good is it..she is still mobile, although weak. I'm going to see her in a bit.hopefully the doctor has given her some more information. It's the not knowing that's the hardest part don't you tank?
Love and hugs
Hi Pluggy,
I'm so sorry that you find yourself in this situation it must be very hard for you and everybody in the family.
I was in hospital with alcohol related Hepatitis in January for 3 weeks after an out of control binge, haven't drunk since, which isn't hard, but it was a scary experience.
I hope that she does pull through or at least stabilise and she is definitely in the right place to do so. Alcohol messes with our minds so much and of course ultimately our bodies, I'm keeping everything crossed for you all.
Hugs,
Michelle xx
My husband was in the same situation around 5 years ago. He was in hospital for exactly 4 weeks. He was extremely poorly. He did manage to turn it around but I was told by his doctor at one point that he had 48 hours to live. I don't know how he did it, but he did. I would say that myself and my family were quite hard on him while he was in hospital because he wouldn't do what he was told either. He had to have a NG tune for feeding and kept pulling it out. It was tough love but ultimately it worked. I wish you every luck in the world but at the end of the day there is only 1 person who can turn this round, it's whether or not she believes she has a reason to. Lots of love xxx
I really hope she can turn this around, I feel for you all so much. It must be terrible to see her like this. Please take care. Lot's of love Lynne xxxx
Hi Pluggy
None of us know what the future holds. Our thoughts are with you all, as we know it isn't going to be an easy road for any of you. The other problem is we don't know just what long-term damage, the alcohol related damage will turn out to be, liver is just one of the areas that is affected.
Whatever the journey you will all be facing our thoughts are with you all.
It might be useful for you as family members to contact your local alcohol family support services. I'm thinking positive, we have to, about the specialists in hospital and her liver and what they can do to help. The other services could prove useful to you all for long-term lifestyle changes that will be needed, if she feels able to make them.
Prayers and thoughts are with you all.
Gx
To be honest, this all sounds bad and end stage but we are not doctors.
Here's the thing, unless she quits drinking she will die. That's how the disease of alcoholism works. She would also need at least 6 months sober to get on the transport list, and that's only after passing tests that show she could survive a 9 hour surgery.
Sadly, most of us die. I'm sorry for her daughter. For my kids it was not a question of if, it was WHEN they would get the call that I had died.
She needs alanon or ACOA programs for loved ones to help them accept and move on.
I was lucky and got sober 9 years ago. I have had one liver transplant and sadly it is not working. I'm now back on the list again, but for a kidney also as my kidneys are breaking down also.
God bless,
Kimberly
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