'The Shadow'

Hi all, not sure really what I'm looking for her but I figured this may be a place to get some information. My mum has been hospitalised twice since July with pains which they've put down to an infection on her liver. Both times she's been pumped with antibiotics and it's cleared the bloods so they've let her out however the shadow is still showing. They've called it abnormal tissue, a shadow, a possible tumour and we still don't have an answer. She had a scope up and down and they were clear but then she was put back to hospital. She's under more tests and she's been told to prepare for the worst so I did and have been convinced it was cancer for a few weeks now.

That's fine, people survive cancer these days. I'm full aware of what to expect. Only, yesterday we went to the oncologist who confirmed again they don't know and she's been passed to a specialist for a scope ultrasound where they will take a biopsy. I put it to him straight and he gave me it direct that he thinks it's a tumour and due to the size and the fact it's spread to her gall bladder (it's approximately a third) if it is cancer they may not find it beneficial to operate and liver cancer is a bad type to get that she may not be able to beat. Sure they would offer other treatment but my mum is a stubborn woman and already of the opinion 'I'm not in pain and I'm going to die some day' so I think it's unlikely she'd go through anything especially as painful as chemo and radio sound.

She's 55! Has 4 beautiful grandkids and 2 children and I'm really struggling. Did anyone have any success stories or advice for me? I'm 30 year old and really strong but this has literally crushed me in to a small child.

5 Replies

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  • Hey sorry to hear about your mum.

    I hope it's not cancer but if it definitely is, other than pointing out her kids and grandkids you mentioned, I'd show her videos of people dying from cancer or even try to meet someone in person. Might shock her into realising there is no easy way out. I did that when my mum was diagnosed with cervical cancer and was trying to refuse treatment. Her cancer was quite aggressive and chemo + radiotherapy was horrible for her but she's ok for now. We're just hoping it doesn't come back as it's still early days.

    Good luck!

  • Thanks KO, hope your mums is curable and she's coping well xx

  • Hi

    Thinking of you all and that both your Mum's will be ok. Please take care. Lots of love Lynne xxxx

  • Thank you Lynne xx

  • You are very welcome. Xxxx

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