Hello, I have always had big issues with fallen asleep even when I was still a kid. As far as I remember from my adult life, before I started consuming alcohol, I used to have bad days because of lack of sleep 2 times per week on average. It was a nightmare. Basically I have this typical vicious cycle of "being afraid of not falling asleep" which results in actually not being able to 
Anyway, around 25 years old I went through big changes in personal life and started going out a lot, at first binge drinking on weekends, parties, friends etc. Then I got into new relationship and life became calm again but I learned was that after drinking I fall asleep in seconds, no matter what. So for the last 7 years I have been drinking wine almost every night because it guarantees me I would fall asleep. And it does. I had a break of 3 months once just to prove myself I can NOT drink, which was easy because I don't care about any other aspects of alcohol, but one night due to stressful situation I was not able to fall asleep until early morning and so I went back to drinking. I drink red wine, always 1 hours before bed. Usually half of the bottle, sometimes more, bottle max, never more than that, not even on extreme situations. Lately I have been worrying about health a lot, I don't have symptoms, but I constantly feel like it's bad for me. But I am so afraid to quit and suffer from insomnia again 
I am very fit, I run a lot, try to eat healthy, but actually eat more sugar than I should. I had liver blood tests a few months ago, everything was normal but I assume they don't usually show the problems? Please advise, anything is appreciated, thanks
Drinking to sleep: Hello, I have always... - British Liver Trust
Drinking to sleep
Good morning Lynda,
Glad you've found this forum.
What you have said suggests that, despite being able to stop easily, you are, if not addicted, dependent on alcohol.. also, the amount you drink is far in excess of what are the accepted maximum levels of weekly intake.
Despite that, you seem to have come through relatively unharmed, which is good news.
However, that is, at your present rate, unlikely to continue. Don't know why you had the blood test but I'm assuming you're concerned about your health. That's a good start.
Let me just say , I understand how easy it is to drift into alcohol use and then into dependence. I also used alcohol to "self medicate" and finished with liver failure. From diagnosis to transplant in just 14 months. Thats the worst case scenario.
You now have the chance to avoid that and being here is the first step.
I would recommend a visit to the GP where you, having asked for a double appointment, have an honest discussion about what is happening. All you need to do is simply repeat what you have already posted here. I would hope that s/he will advise on general ways to keep you and your liver healthy but importantly, refer you to a service that can help you understand the reasons you drink and support you in controlling your use of alcohol.
I hope that is some help to you. You will get lots of advice and support, both in this forum and at the British Liver Trust website.
Take care,
Jim
Thank you, Jim.
Yes, I am concerned about my health and this is why I had these blood tests. And I think I am quite sure that I only need alcohol for sleep. However, it's hard for me to convince myself that even a few days in a week with 5 hours of sleep is no way as harmful as drinking is. This distorted believe makes me think that I am definitely dependent on alcohol now.
Hi Lynda
A year ago, my son (36) was in the same position as you, never a good sleeper, always fit and active (gym bunny). Then it all came to a head and he had another personal problem which was when we found out about his self medicating. With him it was vodka, by the bottle. We were all concerned and got him to the GP. Not realising, he was driving to work, still under the influence. He fortunately was able to stop drinking, as it had frightened him so much, with no real damage done. He moved back home and we have no alcohol in the house at all now. The GP gave him strong sleeping tablets because he was in a state, which he then had to wean himself off, so it wasn`t easy. He has other problems in his life, some of which he is still working through. He should have got counselling, but none was forthcoming. I have hopes that it will still happen.
I expect you have tried all the obvious stuff, winding down before bed, no distractions (phone off), relaxing bath, blackout blinds in the bedroom, ear plugs. It all sounds so corny, but does actually help some people. You might try magnesium bisglycinate supplements (Holland & Barrett sell them) if you suffer "jumpy legs" or can`t relax. Don`t go to bed hungry, never mind the Healthy Eating, save the carbs for bedtime! How about Yoga/relaxation CDs, or even see if you can get hold of a copy of Paul McKenna`s "I Can Make you Sleep". Reading anything, the more boring the better will also help.
Sometimes this problem of not sleeping easily can run in families. It does in ours...my husband, his father, our son. It affects more intelligent people, I believe, because they think too much and worry about stuff. (Not me, I sleep like a log !) 
Best wishes and hugs to you.
XX
i coudnt agree more with you jim you give good advice i too self medicared with wine to get asleep an when i didnt i had th most horrible dreams it is a demon an i can say iam glad iam off it xx
Hi Lynda
Found myself in exactly the same position as yourself. Finding myself using alcohol for sleep. Was also very fit, training in the gym every day, and most other aspects of my life were healthy. Stupidly felt that could control my drinking and not that my drinking was controlling me. But for me the situation became untenable, as my drinking increased started a decline in my fitness and general health. Fifteen years later in rehab and a physical mess.
Also think that sleep on drink is not healthy sleep, quality not quantity.
Still in early days of recovery but now own the fact that this drinking behaviour was alcoholic. Being honest with yourself and accepting the implications of drink controlling your life, which is where you are now, is a great first step. Seek out help from all avenues, your GP will hopefully be a great start. A big problem for me was the folly that could control my drinking myself.
Have also been treated for depression and am on Mirtazapine. This helps with sleeping and taken about an hour before bed.
Take care and hope you find a way
Iam on the same tablets an they do help you sleep i wish id had them sooneronly just been subscribed to me x
Try sleepy from Lush, everyone is raving about it! Going to get some tomorrow for my daughter....
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