Post 2010 and a accident I had, I was a person who all my life worked hard and played hard. Now I am a person who doesn't want to work or play at all. I try all the time to get back to how I was but to no avail, I really miss my "real self" . I have tried various anti depressants but didn't get on with them. I have diazapam here and there for when I get really down to get me away from the really morbid thoughts I have. All I want to do is go to work and can't no matter what I do and I've tried loads, like CBT, voluntary work (made me very ill). I wish I knew what is wrong with me.