Hi, this is mellow 1's husband - British Liver Trust

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Hi, this is mellow 1's husband

I am mellow 1's husband. I wanted to say how inspirational you all are. Going through this is difficult, hard, upsetting and life changing, my beautiful wife shares all of your posts with me and all I see is bravery. Seeing someone you love in pain is heartbreaking but I have learnt so much from you all. I love my wife so much and hope you all have someone to support you. Wishing you all a great weekend and keep the bravery and advice flowing.

9 Replies

Hello mellow1's hubby, welcome aboard. Any time you or Mellow need advice just pop on here, there are lots of us who have either gone through exactly what you are going through or have learned information from our experiences so hopefully there is always someone about to bat ideas off and get support from.

All the best from Katie :)

Ahhh that is so sweet. I hope Mellow will get better and she certainly has a great support in you. She may feel overwhelmed and upset being dependent on you but this is where you have to keep reassuring her and showing her your unconditional love.

I remember feeling guilty for turning so many of family's life topsy turvy. It was a hard time and I felt I was burdening everyone. These are emotions we feel when we have such little energy.

Mellow is doing so well! I hope you both will have years and years of celebrating you love and creating new memories.

Best wishes

in reply to Jahida

You mentioned emotions and that is so correct, I have always been a tough hard person but now I often feel tearful, upset at seeing my wonderful wife in pain, anger at what has happened but mainly joy that my beautiful wife is still here with me. How are your symptoms, we are both thinking of you

Jahida profile image
Jahida in reply to

Thank you. I am OK. I had an urgent liver transplant in May because my liver decided to suddenly fail on me out of the blue. It was during this time last year that the horrible symptoms kicked it.

I felt very sad to see my family and friends suffer because of me. My husband had to travel 40 miles most days to visit me. My mum decided to stay on in Birmingham and she is from Cardiff. She stayed with my uncle for a good month or more. My dad who never leaves the comfort of his own home and is battling his own terminal illness, actually also stayed in Birmingham. My parents were my rock. My sister was driving up and down from Cardiff and my nephew from my husband's side lived closer so he was always the first person to visit.

It was horrible to see my family members go through all these emotions. I have a huge family and everyday I had a group visiting me. My cousins came regularly. I come from an Asian back ground so if you have come across Asians you will know how large our families are and very close knit.

You will be going through a lot of emotions because suddenly seeing someone go from strong to slowly developing symptoms of liver failure is hard. Have you discussed with doctor's what their next stage of plan is? I remember Mellow mentioning cirrhosis stage 3/4 and I understand with diet and medication it may stop progressing?

I really hope that is the case for Mellow and through your love and support she recovers.

Also please, you look after yourself. Remember you need to be healthy in order to look after Mellow so eat and try to get family members to support you as well. This is what I always insisted on with every family member especially my parents. My worry was they will fall ill too. I'm such a stressful person when it comes to everyone helping me. I feel I should be looking after them.

Please ask questions if you need to or if you need a chat then message me.

in reply to Jahida

Mellow1 has a hospital appointment on Monday for an endoscopy, hopefully will know more after that. Take the support of those helping you and try not to stress, I'm a great believer in trying to be laid back and relaxed as a calm, relaxed mind will lead to health. Glad you are feeling OK.☺

The knowledge and experience in here is tremendous.

But the support, positivity and care is just unbelievable.

Best wishes to you both


Thanks, Matt.

How are things with you?

Matt : )

Hi have followed all the posts on here & so comforting & full of advice. I had emergency transplant 15mths ago after sudden total failure (48hrs to liver from diagnosis & being put on super urgent list to a transplant with just hours to go). Our lives have totally changed. Our lives have totally changed, I worked full time, ran my own buisness etc & having to ask my partner & daughters to do everything for me have found so hard. They support but the support our families give us is second to none ( don't know how else to describe it ). The adjustment for everyone is so emotional & it almost like you need to learn to live again. I know my partner has found it particularly hard as due to side effects of meds & other physical problems rely on them for everything from making a cup of tea to helping me push my wheelchair. The tears, grief & emotions all over the place. I found I was trying to box everything up & not tell them how feeling, have now been diagnoised with PTSD, depression & anxiety, so had some councilling, which has helped.

Mellow is doing so well with your unconditional support, but please also take time for yourself to recharge you batteries & get the support you need to. Hope the endoscopy goes well for mellow. Good luck to you both xx

in reply to Raksha1964

I am glad the counselling has helped, boxing things up is the worst thing you can do, but understandable as I don't always tell mellow1 when she looks ill as I don't want to worry her. Thankyou for your best wishes for Monday and I hope you have a nice weekend.

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