I'm new here feel very lost.

[Anita-B]

Just diagnosed a few days ago, still in shock don't yet know my type of cancer, but good chance it's genetic, I am absolutely terrified, mum and sister both have died with breast cancer. Have appointment next Mon to find out more details and to discuss possible treatment.

[Gracie66]

Hang in there Anita. Everyone here knows exactly what you are going through and we are all still here, all had those terrified days, not knowing what was next and no idea what to think or feel.

Its scary when you've already lost someone, but that doesnt mean it will be your story. How did you find out, did you find a lump or was it a routine mammogram? It seems like a long wait till next monday, but if you try (easier said than done) to keep yourself very occupied and keep people around you, it will come quick enough.. once you know what you are dealing with, it actually becomes less frightening. you get on a kind of medical conveyor belt and just get through it and out the other side. and it goes along quite quickly.

everyone in here knows how you are feeling and nothing is unreasonable or a stupid question. The best of luck to you on monday Anita. we are here whenever you need us.

xxx Gracie

[Anita-B in reply to Gracie66]

Thanks so much, yes found a lump myself and went to doctor, surgeon said it will be at least six weeks before surgery, is that usual?

[Gracie66 in reply to Anita-B]

That seems to be fairly normal. good even. my situation was biopsy early June, operation end of july or end of sept, (i had to choose) was more about fixing up what dates the surgeons could co ordinate (breast surgeon and plastic surgeon needed to be free on the same day). i asked would waiting till september put me at risk of the lump escalating up to another level and they said no. wait and see what they say monday anyway. if they are talking surgery already then they sound like they know what the plan will be. ask lots of questions and make them put your mind at rest about anything that is going to keep you from sleeping. xx

[louise007]

Feeling lost is very normal so don't beat yourself up on that emotion.it feels like the world had stopped turning and can feel worse coming up to Christmas .I was diagnosed Dec 14 . You will find your own way through this physically and mentally although you won't see that yet ..take each day good or bad and grab onto any positives ..everyone on here will be here when you need someone . Take care and stay well...

[Lainey66]

Hey there Anita. As daft as this sounds please try and not worry too much. wait for the results and then sit and gather your thoughts. Not an easy thing to do but you have to quell any panic. Yes this is horrid news and, you more than most of us, knows the battle ahead. Remember You are you. Treatments have improved and you may have neen caught in time. I/we are all here to support you. Please do not worry alone. Take care hon and I hope and pray that you are pleasantly surprised at your next appointment. kind regardd and big hugs. Elaine xxx

[Blossom1966]

Anita, I am right there with you. I was diagnosed in October. It is a very scary word to hear as I too have lost many relatives to cancer, 3 to breast cancer. My doctor scheduled me fairly quickly for surgery, but told me we could wait 6 weeks and it wouldn't change my prognosis. I have just recently joined this group but everyone has been wonderful and are very supportive of what you are going through. I have learned that a positive attitude is very important to making it through this journey along with a great support group of people who love you. Surround yourself with those kind of people and be strong. I hope everything goes well Monday. Sending love and positive wishes. Bonnie xoxo

[Jacbowden]

There's not much I can add to these posts from the wonderful ladies here, except to say that I believe we have all felt the same and somehow we still laugh, live, love and get on with the treatment. Great improvements are being made, fine tuning chemo cocktails and recently mixing different ones together have come up with quite surprisingly effective results. Hang in. I'll be thinking of you on Monday. ❤️❤️️

[Hidden]

Hello Anita

I'm so sorry to hear your news & it must be terrifying in light of your Mum & Sister having had breast cancer also, you don't say how old you are or what age your Mum & Sister were when they were diagnosed. It's worth you writing all those facts down before Monday as the Consultant will be likely to question you on that as will the Oncologist & on broader family history of Cancer.

I know it's only Wednesday today & Monday seems a long way off but if you can keep busy, dare I mention the word Christmas but if there is anything you really want to get done this is the time as once you see the Consultant next week, they will become the masters of your diary as you get swept along the treatment route.

Take care of yourself over the next few days & if you can meet up with supportive friends & family I'm sure that'll help a little.

Take Care & we're all here for you 💐

[Debs1962]

Anita, sorry to hear your news, we have all been there and are still here. It is so frightening but you will come through it. They have made big in roads to treatment even in the last few years, my husband has a biology and chemistry degree, and reads all medical journal stuff, so there isn't much he doesn't know! Something to do with the geneo project.

Take one step at a time, and ask as many questions as you can of your doctors, then you can make your decisions.

All of us are here for you to support you xxx

[Hidden]

Hi. It's such a shock when you hear the news but we are all here to listen to all your frustrations, questions and comments. I totally agree with what everyone has said so will not repeat except do write down those questions for your appointment on Monday. When you get in there your mind will go blank. Will you have someone there with you so they can listen and take in anything you might not have picked up on? The biggest hug to you and we will be thinking about you on Monday. Ley us kniw how you get on xx

[biddenden_sue]

I was where you were 3 years ago. All I can say to help is read everything they give you. Make sure someone goes with you to the next meeting. You won't take it all in. An extra pair of ears helps.

Having breast cancer is not the "death sentence" it once seemed to be. 80% of us are still here 10 years later. Brilliant odds. Trust the team who will take you through your treatment. Do everything they tell you, dose yourself up to combat the side effects of the treatment. It's all worth it.

And don't forget we are all here to guide you through it. Keep in touch x

[Jennymary]

So sorry to read of your news, I can only endorse what everyone else has said, and to add write down any questions you have, take them with you and write down the answers, I'm also sure someone else said to take someone with you to take things in and make notes if needed, you can then go off for coffee in more comfortable surroundings and discuss what's going on, stay strong, I'll be thinking of you on Monday x

[anne-57]

Everyone is giving you great advice here. The only thing I would add is take someone with you on Monday. I found it difficult to retain information so having my husband there was invaluable in many ways. Stay positive as others have said its tough but we are all still here. You can do this. x

[footprints]

Hi Anita,xx sorry to here your diagnosis...welcome to this site, I know how your feeling, like all of us,I don't think I could speak for days, I too lost my sister a year before I was diagnosed, and my mum had bowel cancer just as I was finishing chemo. Stay strong, you will find your strenth....big hugs always here for you xxx

[Hidden]

Hi Anita,

I'm awaiting biopsy on a suspicious lump and I'm full of anxiety too. My head is all over the place and I didn't ask enough questions. Remember that there have been huge advances in treatment even in the last couple of years. It doesn't take away our worries but it gives hope. The ladies on this site are fantastic and their advice is the so good. Reading their posts reminds us all that it's possible to go through treatment and emerge from the other side. Take heart and push forward. Bless you and good luck.

[AppleL]

Hi Anita - I can't begin to image what it feels like for you at this time. I went with my mum for her consultations and treatments. At the time I worked on the NHS Choices website and found some good advice on there about preparing questions for visits to see health professionals. I don't doubt that its difficult to concentrate but try and plan for all your appointments by writing down your questions to ask and anything like symptoms or things you have experienced to raise. Don't be afraid to ask the question twice if you haven't understood things. Write them down if possible or get someone to go with you to help cover everything (give them a copy of your questions too). This is what I used. While it's based on a GP visit, it does help you to frame your questions for consultants and nurses etc.

Try here:

macmillan.org.uk/information-and-support/treating/treatment-decisions/questions-to-ask

nhs.uk/NHSEngland/AboutNHSservices/doctors/Pages/questions-to-ask-the-doctor.aspx

best wishes, Lee

[Anita-B]

Thanks you all for your very helpful advice, as the days go by I am starting to accept it better, waiting for my appointment on Monday, want it to happen but scared of what they might tell me but know I have to face that to allow me to move forward.