British Lung Foundation

To brighten your evening

ROMANCE

An older couple were lying in bed one night. The husband was falling

asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk. She said:

You used to hold my hand when we were courting." Wearily he reached across,

held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep. A few moments

later she said: "Then you used to kiss me." Mildly irritated, he reached

across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep..

Thirty seconds later she said: "Then you used to bite my Neck." Angrily

he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed. "Where are you going?"

she asked.

"To get my teeth!"

_____________________________________

DOWN AT THE OLD PEOPLES HOME

80-year old Bessie bursts into the dining room at the old peoples home.

She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces," Anyone who can guess

what's in my hand can have sex with me tonight!!" An elderly gentleman in

the rear shouts out, "An elephant?" Bessie thinks a minute and says, "Close

enough."

25 Replies
oldestnewest

Thanks, Bobby. I was sitting here thinking how tired I was and would it be put right by a glass of wine. Hey presto, a witticism from your good self. Thanks!!

Reply

Anytime Anne, anytime.

Bobby xxxxx

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For what, I wonder, Bobby!!!

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Behave! Bad girl!

Bobby xxxxx

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Your mind, Bobby!

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I have a very clean mind. Is a good boy.

Bobby xxxxx

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Since when?

Richard

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Since I was brainwashed as a child. lol

Bobby

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I am calling for my chaperone, Hi, Scrobs, where are you?

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Hi Annie, I'm home!!!! Been out tonight being all cultural - a poetry evenin' - so am resisting the urge to rhyme my replies :) Chaperoning duties not a problem !

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That was very funny. :)

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The old 'uns are the best ones Chell.

Bobby xxxx

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I have found that xxx

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Are you talking about yourself?

Richard

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That's no fair Richard, especially after I left Scrobby for you. he he

Bobby

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Thanks for the laugh, keep them coming

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Thanks Bobby xxx

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Bessie is a gal after me own heart, go Bessie !!!!

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Oh thanks Bobby, I really enjoyed those, they took me back to the good old days

Love

The Witch

xxxx

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Hiya Witchy

I remember me dad telling me about the good old days. lol

Bobby xxxx

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Nice one, brightened my morning.xxx

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Brightened my morning too and the sun is coming out !, I'm going to clean the kitchen.

Lib x

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I have to do mine today too, Lib - shall we do synchronised cleaning? xx

Reply

wonderfull had to borrow this. ta muchly

Reply

Ha ha thanks we all need a laugh

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