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It's that time of the week again!
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Hidden well that didn't even last an hour, did it?
Nope.
Please, please lets stop the constant moaning and get on with enjoying being friends on here. I have to say I haven't seen any bullying on this forum and I come on every day. The constant moaning is really getting me down. Think I'll leave coming on here for a few a while until this passes.
Jean
Hello
I am begging you all please please please stop all this now I am in tears here with my heart racing
I have nowhere to go this is my only support but I am so struggling to keep seeing all this arguing
I am not perfect by any way and not everyone will like me but so many of us need harmony on here now , we have members if we look at posts in Hospital waiting to see if they have had another heart attack we have newcomers looking on maybe desperately needing support or reassurance we are adults can we just not let all this go I am begging you all here
I will say I am sorry to anyone I may have ever upset on here I will also say I am grateful for the support I have had and people that have tried to defend me but I would be so very very grateful and I sincerely mean it if this could stop now
We need to let go and focus on supporting each other , just don't interact with people that are personalities clash with or disagree with it is so simple
All this could be stopping people asking for help that are reading this forum do we really honestly want that is that what we have become ?
Most of us are lucky to be here can we not try and remember that rather than falling out over some things we cannot change we are the lucky ones
Be kind please it is so simple we do slip up now and again I do to but we can move on and this post is suppose to be for laughter , off topic subjects not to rip HU apart as much as I have my views to and certainly not to rip each other apart
Please don't take the one thing I have from me by making it impossible for me to stay on here
Be kind and bring order back to the Community so we can ask for help and give help and be grateful we were lucky enough to be here to do so
If you do not agree with me please do not attack me but I hope you will see this is getting no one nowhere now and let it be
My tears are stopping me see the buttons I should press for my smiley face but maybe that is not a bad thing as I am not smiling but so sad
BeKind
I know it's easy to say but step back and don't read this thread. I can't understand why a new location away from HU has been set up but some people still feel the need to stir things up on here, please do it somewhere else.In the old days we would have said these guys are having a p*ssing contest, maybe they'd like to do it somewhere else away from the grown ups.
Bekind28, leave this thread and don't look back, reread the thread where people were missing you.
Thank You Heather and I will do that 
x
I agree Heather. I'm staying away from this (anti) social check in now. It's no longer fun! 😏
Hey BeKind
I've missed you, I don't often post on here anymore but I agree with the other comments, don't go on this thread.
When I first joined you were so supportive to me and when I was in hospital with pneumonia I looked forward to your supportive messages x
Carry on being the amazing person you are
V x
Thank You x
I just want to send you lots of love and a squishy hug! There's some lovely folk on here that absolutely have your back and are firmly in your corner .. I am one of the above!
im very new here but can already see this situation Bekind28- is hurting you, I'd like to rubber stanp that the love and support for you on here must surely prove that your kindness has gone a very long way in helping others?
Please don't let those with less emotional maturity than you affect your behaviour online in the forum or your general mood,
You are doing great & life is far too short to give this airspace lovely x
Hello
A squishy hug I will accept thank you
Thank you for your kind words they mean a lot and I really do appreciate them as you are right in what you have observed in the hurt I am just not into that kind of thing and struggle to understand why some are but I will do my best to try and ignore it
Thank You x
it upsets you understandably ... but, only because you are genuine and doing your very best supporting others Meaness just reflects badly on the perpetrator and being sensitive to that, shows your strength of character x
Hello
I am not sure I have a strength of character maybe the opposite but thank you for your kind words again x
Good morning!I am glad to see you still here. I've missed your posts and friendly helpful advice. I've been reading some of the posts lately and thought what the heck is actually going on here? Hopefully the forum can get back to the place it was when i joimed to years ago with people like your good self on hand to help people along and receive help aswell.
Take care. Jules xx
Dear Be Kind , I completely agree with you and empathise with the way you feel.Most people whom come to this forum are here because they have illnesses , either acute or chronic , or are carers of people with heart conditions, anxious for the health of their loved ones , all things made worse by Stress. And accidentally coming across overly domineering , aggressive or downright insulting comments when you were hoping to read words of advice , positive care , and support can send you're heart racing and ruin your whole day.
Comments that often come back in response when you put out a well worded plea for negative behaviour to stop , like , " If you don't like it , don't read it", or , " just ignore it" , are not helpful as you wouldn't have commented on a upsetting reply unless you've already read it , in which case the damage has obviously already been done.
I understand that everyone speaks or writes differently. Often people try to put a point across if they disagree with someone in as few words as possible and may not realise how abrupt or rude it may be to read. But this is easy to clear up. People should read a reply back before pressing the button as though it was being said to themselves ,and, if they see they have said something that could be hurtful , negative or aggressive change to more positive words knowing that , that little action could make a big difference to someone else's day or symptoms.
And saying sorry if you have upset someone is not hard, rather than adding insult to injury with another snappy comment because you feel bad for the first reply.
I know some people like a heated debate rather than just a discussion , but as you say Be Kind , a health forum full of other genuinely ill people whom could be made to feel even worse by reading negative comments is not the place to " enjoy a good argument", I'm sure if that's what people are looking for there are many, many places for that.
Not that people like you and I believe that we can't disagree with someone , especially if they may have accidentally given a harmful suggestion or dangerous advice , we just believe , like many, many members here that those disagreements can be worded kindly and respectfully, not thrust down the throats of the people with different opinions to our own. We are all different , and have different opinions but the one way we can all be the same is in choosing positive language to put those differences across.
People need this forum for positive help and support, a kind and friendly word or reassurance not to test whether their blood pressure medications are working or to read such tense conversations that our monitors start bleeping.
People should not be made to feel like they can't comment on a post for fear of bullying , or even worse , be made to feel like they have to stop posting or taking part in a forum at all that actually does the opposite that a health forum should and makes them feel unwell. Especially, as often the forum is the only place some people can go for support.
I have many chronic conditions so I am on a number of forums , most others have volunteer moderators or ambassadors from the membership that give up a little time to help keep things healthy by either giving a request for behaviour to stop with the authority of their title , or having the ability to privately message members to ask them to edit a post and finally are able to remove unpleasant or trolling posts and replies before most of the membership has to endure reading it. The volunteers usually have a group on the PM board to discuss what should be done with each other for consensus . I do think this sort of system may help on this forum , as there does not seem to be any instant moderation in place which gets rid of the need for endless reports that are often not resolved.
I hope you feel better , I hope you don't feel you have to go , and I hope that if you need a shoulder or a virtual hug , anytime that you will message me on PM , as I am always happy to hear from people and help to advise them or brighten their day if I can. Take care , keep positive and keep being your kind and lovely self, it's people like you that members think of as a precious contributor, virtual hugs , Bee.
what a supportive reply, trolls take note and please be aware there’s people on here looking for support and I’m first in the line especially mentally 😩
I'm intrigued , are you a lover of dogs three times over , or do you have three dogs that you love , and what type of cuddly support chums do you have. I bet hearing about your dogs and how they help you feel better would be just the type of conversation people would want to read on this thread. Big hugs , Bee
hi Bee I’m a dog lover and I had 3 rescues one died I had him 10 years my other two were taken away from me by my daughter without my permission and knowledge and nobody would get any happiness from this story so now I am completely alone and heartbroken, and am to old to take on another one as unable to exercise it and vets bills have sky rocketed I have been rescuing for over 35 years and they all came with problems which can be costly. Thank you for the hug I needed that x 🤗
And an extra hug from me xx
Oh , that is shame , I'm sorry to remind you of something so sad . I'm sure that while you had the dogs with you you managed to store up some lovely memories to think about when you are feeling blue. In fact , after 35 years of caring for rescue dogs you should have a thousand memories and a good few medals for your kindness.Don't ever think you are completely alone , you may not meet us face to face but you have a whole gang of Faraway Friends on this forum ready to chat or give you a virtual hug or some advice whenever you need it. And , unlike the dogs , you don't have to take us for a walk each day and feed us!
Do you know if there are any organisations in your area that do volunteer home visits with dogs for you to get a cuddle from without the cost or hard work?
It might be worth looking into on your local charity or community websites. Take care , Bee 💖
Hello
Thank you so much for taking the time to write such a supporting reply to me full of reassurance as well as the offer t message you if ever I need to talk
I agree with everything you have said amd was something nice to click on and read
I hope you have a lovely day x
And you too, keep looking for those silver lining no matter how thin they might be every day , it always helps me get through , hugs , Bee💖
I will try x
👏👏👏🌷
Thank you , hugs , 🐝
I always try to read your messages Bee, they are full of warmth and compassion and I feel better after reading them. Wishing you all the best. 😊
Thank you so much that's very kind of you and does make me feel more positive about myself. With my limited chance to contribute physically to helping others it's nice to know I am being helpful in the way I can. Take care and keep playing that piano! Hugs , Bed
I had a look at some of your previous posts, they are all uplifting. If you don’t mind me saying, imo you make a great contribution to the forums.
If only I could play, but I love to listen to classical music. The hugs are much appreciated Bee, hugs back to you.🤗
What a thoughtful and considerate reply! I agree with the points that you made, and I certainly could not have said it better.
I know that the bickering makes me feel more anxious than I already do. I’m almost sure that others may feel the same way.
Thank you and others for being calm voices of reason and respect to others. ❤️
My pleasure , and I hope being able to voice your feelings on this has also made you feel a little happier too.Believe me when I say over the years of taking part in forums on HU this happens everywhere and the vast majority of members feel exactly the same as you and Be Kind about it , often feeling too shy to complain about the very small minority making all the noise and making everyone else feel uncomfortable even if they are asked politely to stop by other members.
Active Moderators can help as a voice of authority can often nip these online tussles in the bud and stop a post being taken over by a fight nobody wants to see or finds helpful for their health condition. Hopefully. the forum administrators might consider more active moderation in the future and make our time together on the forum more positive.
Keep well , keep relaxed and enjoy lifes pleasures , no matter how small , hugs , Bee
Well said. I am a new member still struggling with my Angina diagnosis and the pain that it causes. Even at 81, I still like to get out into my garden,potter about in the greenhouse and grow plants which are mostly given away. My problem is that I forget to slow down, I still move as I always have, perhaps a bit slower, but at times fast enough to bring the pain back.It is hard watching my wife doing things that I should be doing. Yesterday our 21 year old grandaughter, had to get into the roof space for us, I couldn't watch because it was something that my mind said I should be doing. We have now employed someone to do the heavy work in the garden, again all jobs that I would have done. I am slowly accepting that my angina means a reality check, step back and enjoy how the garden looks, accept the help.I find this channel realy helps, because you may find an answer to problems from someone who has a similar issue.
What I don't like is all of the 'back biting', why do they do this, it certainly doesn't help. I am also very aware, that some people love to take offence, even for the smallest in some cases 'imagined' problem or comment. In the USA, the females are called 'Karens' and the men 'Kens', they have an in built sense of 'entitledment.'There are also people who take offence when being helped,I have been sworn at using the F & C words just for holding a shop door open to let a young woman through.I was brought up to respect my elders, I would stand up on buses to give my seat to someone, walk on the kerb side of the pavement when passing someone, asking if someone wanted help to carry a heavy bag. That was how we were brought up in the 1940s and 50s, but today all that has gone, there isn't the respect anymore.
Well that's my rant for today, please people stop the bickerring and enjoy the help FREELY given on this site.
yours,
bludnut
Hello
Welcome even though I am not sure this is where most of us wanted to find ourselves but here we are and a lot of the time it is such a kind helpful place to be seems it has gone of track a little but hopefully will get back on to been how it was when I first joined
I enjoyed reading your reply you are in the US and I in the UK and I like my garden to and did think how lovely you grow plants and give most away and how much I would like been your neighbour as I love my plants to
I also found it interesting how you call females Karens and men Kens
There maybe 20 years between us but I am old fashioned to brought up in the 60's and I think it is so nice when someone opens a door for you gives their seat up for you I sometimes wished we could go back to those days
It can be hard to accept help adjust to the new you especially when you have been so independent but I have a feeling over the years you have given a lot to others and now it is time they give to you and I hope you know it will be because they care about you let them help you and enjoy the new you and all the things you can still enjoy and do we all slow down and need help as we get older even without health problems but sounds to me you are still doing plenty
I hope we will get the supportive Community this usually is back soon and thank you for you supportive reply x
Hi, thanks for your reply. I am English born and bred, and do not live in the USA. The comment about Karen and Ken comes from watching you tube on the internet. I am sorry to have inadvertainly missled you, but thank for your kind words. I am sure that you see similar incidents of people who believe that they are entitled, and that us mere mortals should allow them to do as they please and get out of their way. One tip for anyone wishing to grow tomatoes, don't spend money on seeds. Just cut open a tomato, spread the seeds out on a bit of kitchen roll and leave them to dry. Then carefully spread the seeds out on the roll, lay it on a tray of compost and thinly cover with more compost. You will soon see new seedlings popping up. Earlier this year I inadvertantly mixed some compost which contained a dried cherry tomato, I now have numerous seedlings growing.I use small washed yoghurt tubs as plantpots, just drill a hole in the bottom, saves money.
thanks again,
bludnut
Hello
English born and bred to
That is a great tip about how to grow tomatoes would have never known you could do that
Thank you for sharing that with us x
You can save loads of money by doing this with other fruits with seeds. Dry plum, peach and other fruit stones and then carefully split the stones open and set the inner seed in a pot of compost. Just keep the compost damp and eventually you will get a new fruit tree. I keep my flower seeds,collect them, let them dry and put them in dry containers, or envelopes ( wright the names on them) then set them the following year. you should never have to buy any seeds again. I spread Poppy seeds in the wild to help brighten things up.
bludnut
I have two avocado trees which have come from avocado stones that I planted. Not sure if they will produce any avocados, but I live in hope.🥑
Hi, I'm going to give the tomato growing a go with your suggestion, I have a few empty pots from tomato plants that are long gone, so keen to give it a go again!
I loved your hints for growing tomatoes! I would love to grow some cherry tomatoes too. Last summer, (I had my HA in late March and felt like rubbish for months afterward.) I didn’t buy or plant anything. I had had plans for things to plant and do, but nothing worked out.
Yesterday, I visited a greenhouse and bought several flowers to plant 🪴! I talked with people there and just enjoyed myself. A young lady who works there helped me to pick out and carry my 💐. Mostly, this summer, my flowers will be placed in baskets to hang on my porch or to sit on my patio, but seeing those blooms each day will make me feel happier.
Take care! 😊
Hi Smitty,
Looking after plants can be a therapy, while I dont actually talk to mine, there are people who get help by doing just that. The tomatoes that I wrote about were cherry ones, and some were the Vine type, the ones you see in supermarlets. I grew them just for me, my wife doesn't like them. I like to try new ways of trying to grow plants, and saving seeds or taking cuttings helps me, and keeps the cost down.
It’s a great idea to save the seeds. I am going to try your suggestion for planting a couple of cherry tomatoes. I love those just to snack on! This summer, I will try 2-3 plants and see how I do with them.
You had some smashing ideas to try for growing other veggies/fruits too. A few years ago (2019), I decided to buy daisies for my flower pots so that they might come back year after year and save some cash on getting annuals to plant. However, one pot of daisies died out in December 2022, during a very cold snap. Next spring, if all goes well, I will dig up and divide my daisies into both large pots again—maybe even into my flower beds. I love daisies so it would work out really well.
Your garden is probably just lovely! And it is so relaxing to spend some quiet time in the garden. 😊
Muummmm home grown tomatoes! You've reminded me of my childhood when GrandDad used to let me pick them & eat them straight off the plants (when ripe of course). I think i'll try and give growing my own a go too.
Just a bit of extra encouragement for you, my Marmande (beefsteak) tomato plants, from seeds past their use by date. Planted 3rd May, ready to pot on. I agree, tomatoes are so good when you can pick them and eat straight away, great flavour.
I sowed tumbling tom; just 3 plants but they are crowding us out of the conservatory; like flipping triffids
That’s great, hope you get plenty of tomatoes on them. Have you grown them before?
Marmande are shorter and more stocky.
Yep grown tumbling tom for years, red and yellow. Are marmande indoors? Blight tends to strike early here if outdoors so I stick to indoor tomatoes and indoor cucumbers - no room for anything else except a pot of basil.. Got lettuce this year for first time ever. I usually either forget to water them or slugs get them but two packets of nasturtiums sown near my broad beans to attract the black fly away from the beans and only one single seed germinated. Same last year. I used to be inundated with nasturtiums.
No, outdoors, I don’t have a greenhouse or conservatory. Now you’ve mentioned it I think they had blight the last time I grew them. I usually grow Basil too but haven’t got round to it this year. Yes ‘companion planting’ good idea, shame they didn’t germinate. They add a good splash of colour too. Any other plants that you could use instead for the black fly?
I don't know any others for black fly. I think teh only answer is to cut off the tips at the first sign of black fly but I didn't notice them last year and they did very poorly but it was far too hot for them. I put French marigolds round my tomatoes for white fly. I tried Losetto tomatoes outdoors one year; they are supposed to be blight resistant and no they didn't get it but they didn't crop very well. but that's probably my fault for not feeding them enough. I have bad spinal problems and struggle now to even get into the garden. I'm appalled by the weeds this year but I just can't do it. I had help last year but can't find anyone now. I have a lad who cuts the lawn and will do hedges later but that's all.
We are up against it Qualipop, what with the heat, the pests and both of us having spinal problems. I also have someone to cut the lawn once a fortnight and the hedges in the autumn. I do what I can, but often feel quite frustrated at how little I am able to achieve. I have decided that going for a more ‘natural’ look is the answer.
Exactly the help I have now but garden is mostly herbaceous perennials which are hard work cutting back in autumn ; just can't get on top of weeds. Couch grass is NOT a natural look I want but seeing what I could do a year ago but can't manage now is upsetting.
I have lots of herbaceous perennials too and never manage to cut them all back. I’m fortunate that they cover most of the ground so there isn’t much bare earth for weeds to grow. I know how upsetting it is, it’s hard not to think back to what we used to be able to do. 🙂
My worst area is among the fruit bushes, red and black currants and goosebobs and between the paths plus clumps like pinks that have more grass in them than leaves.
Some years ago we used to have blackcurrants and gooseberries, if I remember gooseberry bushes have very sharp thorns which makes it even more difficult to weed under them. Pity you weren’t able to find someone who would accept the fruit in exchange for some weeding. I’ve just had a delivery of Strulch which I’m hoping to put down on any areas of bare earth to help with weed control.
Yes lots of thorns. Last year the birds got all the red currants before I realised but there's never enough fruit to pay someone. I didn't manage to prune the goosebobs last year so there won't be as many this time and I always forget which of the black or red fruit on new wood or 2 yrs old wood. Going to try to get out today with a trowel and big bucket. It's sunny with a cold wind. Strulch is a very good idea or maybe an old piece of carpet which is what I used when we moved in. The bushes are right at the back out of sight.
Please remember to pace yourself, it’s so easy to forget the time and just do a little bit more. I know, I’m guilty of doing this.
Oh yes I Know how easy it is. Yet again I did nothing except water my potatoes. It turned out far too hot.
I was going to water earlier on, but it was too hot, waiting till this evening. I have potatoes too which are badly in need of earthing up, and runner beans. Going to pot on toms. tomorrow hopefully.
My toms were in big pots 3 weeks ago now covered in flowers but drying out very quickly as they'r e pot bound. Need a couple of grow bags but not in doors. Potatoes are in bags. Lawn is now yellow so next time the lawn mower man can cut a hedge instead. There's a laurel behind our fence that's threatening to push it over.
Finished watering, and earthed up pots (in bags). Great that your toms are already covered in flowers. Do you manage to lift heavy things when needed? The thing with gardens is that there always seems to be something that needs to be done as of yesterday.
NO, I can't even lift a bag of shopping now. I have to get it delivered into the house and unpacked for me. For now husband moves things like bags of compost but he has Dupuytren's contracture so he's getting that he can't grip things . Our nursery just down the road used to deliver compost and put it it the garage but have now stopped because of fuel prices. We do have a sack truck but it's getting the stuff onto it that's a problem. I stocked up last year w hile I had help; just hoping it lasts a few years.
I thought that would be the case as you have problems with your spine, it really does make things difficult. Just wondering if your lawn mower man may be able to help with lifting. I get through compost very quickly at this time of year.
He probably would but he's always rushing; he does all his lawns then goes off to a night job. He did clear the conservatory g utters for me last week.
You’ve nothing to loose by asking, he might say no but on the other hand…..
Back again? 😂
I think that’s obvious now considering you keep coming back 😂
Actually you are more than wrong there it is just a badge I don't need one of those and would not have one if you paid me I just want to be me just as I am
PS no offense to any heart stars on here by my comment you do a great job x
Ignore them BeKind28- . Looks like trolling is on their agenda for the day!
Please step away from this post BeKind - you are MUCH too good, and MUCH too highly thought of by so many people on this forum, for any of us to lose your input. This type of thread will upset you too much. I have reported "Hidden" three times already within the last five minutes because I am angry for the first time in a long time and my next step will be to report the Health Unlocked Moderators/administrators non-contribution/involvement to this problem to the British Health Foundation if something is not done about this 'person' trolling you.
Hello
Yes I have been told by Heather to keep away and I know she is right
I feel I am been signaled out by other members to so as much as some may like my input there are obviously some that wish to make me feel otherwise
Thank You x
It seems to have been a member who is now "Hidden" - a cowardly toe-rag who doesn't even have the guts to stay and is too frightened to face anyone else and likes to bully gentle people. A typical keyboard warrior who probably still lives in a basement somewhere with only a keyboard for company. Yes Hidden, it's you I'm talking about if your still lurking around reading replies and Yes Hidden, I'm baiting you. Come and face up to this 7st , 63yr-old woman.........Oh Yes, that's right - you're too scared.
I get the impression from members that it is a troll was on yesterday in a different user name came back on today in another one and no doubt will be back again so shall try and dodge ball them as we say which means keep out the way x
I don't care how little you are you've frightened me!! 😅
😀😂
I wouldn't worry they called me a pig which I found hilarious. So childish, I can't get upset by something so silly. I'm glad they are obviously bothered by me. 🤣
Like yourself, Heather - I wouldn't give a damn what they called me and would find it funny too. It just annoys me to see them picking on someone as gentle as BeKind who answers every post with only empathy, compassion and kind advice.
I am trying to keep of this post 
I saw that Heather I was disgusted and if they had not deleted when I saw it I was going to say something
I have my Autism but when I read what some are like I am so glad I am not Autistic and why I struggle than a sick person like I see on here x
Please don't post as you'll be giving them what they want, they are probably seething that you came back which is why they are goading you.I hope HU do something to stop them rejoining, I believe they can block the IP address. If that person continues I believe they will be moving into criminal behaviour and I'm sure the admin of this site do not want to be part of that if the sh*t hits the fan.
I will stay away from it and try and avoid a few others that I think have it in for me but doing it in a more quiet way x
I mentioned 'potential legal repercussions' when I reported the posts to admin too, Heather, should the fan get hit!
Unfortunately I'm no techie but pretty sure that most people don't have a static IP address. It changes every time you switch your computer on. Static addresses are mostly used for websites. There must be a way though to stop them constantly using new names. |Sadly it c an't be done by email either. There are lots of free short term email addresses that can't be traced.
YOu'd think that there would be a way to block such people from signing up again under a different name by checking their IP address or email although I do know your IP address changes every time you log on and it's very easy to get free, short term email addresses. But still, it should be possible.
Oh good grief, that's hilarious. I wonder if it's a youngster who's signed up.
I came on here hoping to lighten my mood. To say I’m depressed is an understatement and I’m feeling crap. Then I read about bullying and read arguments which is so unnecessary. Please stop and think about new people on here, like me, who need help and advice because we’re all scared of dying aren’t we? If you don’t like the people on here, just leave and join another forum. I’m in tears as I’m so upset.
Please don't be upset, that's what these silly children want.Some people need their heads banging together.
I'm sure normal service will resume shortly.
thanks. I took it to heart as I was feeling depressed x
You're quite right of course, Yoga. I'm afraid I allowed myself to be goaded into my responses and should have ignored it, for which I apologise if I've caused you any upset. As Heather says, I'm sure normal service will resume soon . Carol x
thanks. It actually wasn’t you but a couple of others. I got upset as I’m depressed at the moment x
I hope I've not caused any more upset either Yoga I mean no offence! We are all in this together x
no it wasn’t you either but thank you for contacting me. I know most people on here are nice, I just happen to be having a bad day and read some posts that weren’t nice x
Hello
We have been talking tonight and I am sorry you came upon the arguing and it upset you I don't cope with it either I really struggle and have been about a while and have been worried for newcomers
Best to stay away from the posts like Heather has been telling me to do but saw your reply so sorry Heather I had to come on
Please do not think most people are like you have read on the posts there are some really lovely members and they will help to support you
Focus in the positives on here I know it is not always easy when we are down but stick with us x
thank you. I’ve read many nice comments on here by many nice people like yourself so won’t be leaving 👍 If I see any rude or nasty posts I shall simply report them and move on to nicer posts x
I am pleased you have got over the shock it gets to me but hopefully it will settle down and yes meantime stick on the nice posts with the lovely members we do have on here x
In the good old days in order to communicate one had to find pen and ink, paper, envelope and a stamp and then walk to the postbox. That gave one time to reconsider one’s response, and not write something instantaneously when the emotions might be high and hit the send button and maybe regret having done so. Now it is all too easy to write something in the heat of the moment and send.
there was something nice about receiving a hand written letter, full of up to date info on family or friends. I was always excited when the postman delivered twice a day then.
I agree about handwritten communications. You could even almost set your watch by the postman's visits. These days, in some areas, it seems like anything from 8am to 6pm for the one delivery is the norm.
Hello
I agree as well as Birthday cards which I craft some and enjoy but they seem to be getting less and less now as people just text Happy Birthday yet there is nothing better than getting a card knowing someone has taken the trouble to get it for you write it and send it x
1234_6 kindly asked how my husband is doing now. The answer is that I have him home with a drain in his side and a bag and the hospital is going to call him in in 3 weeks time to see if he needs a further op. He will be monitored and a nurse will come on Thursday. Has not done my bp any good at all of course and my heart is not particularly happy either BUT at least he is home if exhausted and grey looking.
Thanks for the update. Hope that you are getting the support you need.
I'm glad he is home, speaking personally they discharged me 4 days after a bypass but I was so glad to be home.
It must be hard when you're not 100% yourself to then care for a loved one.
Don't forget to look after yourself too.
I’ll be all right but am tired and my afib is back again. I can cope with it.
Brought him home yesterday with a tube from his kidney coming out of his side And into a bag. OK last night but lunchtime it was leaking and the urine coming out was very bloody so called hospital. Hospital told me to phone GP. GP said take him to hospital. Managed to get hold of the District Nurse who was coming tomorrow and she came and tightened all sorts of connections and we are hoping it will be OK now and that the blood in the urine lessens. It is all very red looking. District Nurse tried to phone the hospital but she could not get anyone to speak to her either. She will be phoning tomorrow. Cannot help but be worried.
Meanwhile the sun is shining out there and the wren still in situ on her nest.
TBH I would have called the district nurse first as for things like this you'll get help.My mother is on a catheter and the last few days she's had problems with the catheter blocking. She had it changed yesterday and had to call them again today, she waited 3 hrs but found out they were on strike today so she was lucky.
Keep the number of the DNs close by, they are a wonderful resource.
I only called 111 AFTER the district nurse had been and cleaned him up but did not have the correct dressings or skill to change the one by the actual drain. She told me to phone 111 if he was still leaking after she had tightened things up. She rang again this morning to ask what had happened. Must get back to her after I have picked husband up and brought him home.
had to phone 111 last night re bloody leakage from drain still. Explained carefully that we needed to go to a hospital which had an urology/kidney department and no point in going unless we could see at least a specialist nurse. Was told to take him before 1am to a local hospital and report to A&E. Did that only to find at around 4am they are not an urology hospital but a urologist would be round later that morning. Got home just after 5am. Am about to go and pick him up. He has had a scan and they will be calling him in for 5days to have a stent fitted. Very very tired. Bp too high of course and AFib. Naturally. Still the sun is shining and at least I can pick him up and give him the right diet - a thing that the hospitals def do not do. The last hospital asked me to write and and complain about the diets their kidney patients are given because they are all wrong. They say they have tried but are not taken any notice of. This last hospital said that 111 were always getting things wrong. I dunno!
Hi Granny E, I'm glad he is home & that a nurse is going to come in to him on Thursday. I know it is hard work for you to look after him while you aren't well, but hopefully having him at home will be easier to cope with than the daily drag to-and-fro the hospital for you. Do try and take care of yourself, & ask GP for further nurse assistance if needed - for him and / or you too.
❤️
I must admit that the drive to and from the hospitals was very tiring and then the long treks within the hospitals was my daily exercise. Still rather tired. Garden a joy but should get out there every day and do cutting back and pulling up.
Your garden looks beautiful (from your picture post last week) and shows that you must normally work very hard on it; but I think that at the moment if you have any time left from looking after each other that you need to just get out there into the Garden and to sit and rest and look at it & enjoy it🌹. I know you wont agree with me, but i dont think the weeds will mind a day or two to grow 🌱. 🥰
1 year’s seeds 7 years weeds. Main problem with just sitting in the afternoon is that a wren has taken over the swing chair in the summerhouse and is nesting in the spring on which it is suspended on one side. The baby blue tits in the nest box on the balcony have flown.
Some years ago I hung an army type jumper with reinforced shoulders upside down on the line to dry. A wren flew in, made a nest and the jumper was left on the line until the babies flew the nest.
i enjoy your jokes. Thanks
ouch.
14 likes including mine - is that a record? 🥳
First time I have been on here and wow not a great post to read.Shocked that this is the way you say good morning!And to everyone reading - I have no idea who are the antagonists and who are those who feel wronged.But if we could all be nice kiddies.Think before you post ,don't overreact and try not to be goaded.A flame needs fire.I have to remind myself before I post.
I don't doubt some are being bullied and if you are please don't suffer in silence.Report it or reach out.
It’s tempting to want the last word for both of you but isn’t helping. Let’s get back on track.
Nobody’s name should be mentioned without their permission on a public forum as it is against data protection.
I hope this is the right place! 🤗
My son’s birthday is coming up and he’s been begging me for a pet spider. So I went to our local pet shop for a price but they were $70! No way Jose, I thought – I can get one much cheaper off the web.
Oops, I tried to start a new post, but it landed here. Sorry for butting in. 😮
Good joke 🕷️🕸️. I thought you were being serious until the last line.
I don't understand how this thread filters out where it puts stuff either ❤️. It always seems to end up.in the wrong place.
It had me fooled as well. 🤗
not butting in.
Hehehe good one!...I thought you were serious too, I had to read it twice!!🤣😂
lol! 😃
thx
To help you smile. A new neighbour behind us recently cut down a tree behind our wall. We can now see this magnificent sight in his garden. Makes me smile every day. It's a magnificent clematis covering a tree.
beautiful ❤️
how lovely. I think it is a Montana. They are very vigorous Our one on our north facing wall did not like the winter much and a lot of it has died but there is enough of it still alive to make sure it will survive.
Exactly!
😅😅😅
Good one, Andy! I laughed out loud. 😃
I am from the U.S. and I find the terms “Karen” and all the others offensive. There are certainly many self-absorbed and insensitive people here, but I find that many of the people calling others names may also be at fault. Small groups, or even individuals, often draw the bulk of attention—in America and even on health forums.
I hope that I have not been offensive in my comments.
excellent
31 likes now 😁
I can’t work it out either. Doesn’t make any sense 😂
It’s become a shambles 😂.
Can you go back to posting not so good jokes where everyone groans at them so your reputation can be restored 😅
Tos am I missing something ?
Where are the good jokes could you tell me where to find them please x
Sorry if I was unclear. By “here”, I meant the US—not this forum. Often, it seems that many people just want to argue or find fault. The labeling may sometimes be justified, but it can also sometimes simply be dismissive.
Anyway, it is sad that people can be so quick to be insensitive or unkind to others. Hopefully, that will improve here on the forum.
Love it!
😂😂😂 it’s been a painful day more than usual ta for the giggle.
Not in any way in competition with Andy (never tangle with an expert is my approach 😀), but a friend of mine shared this question and answer with me today:
What did Spartacus say when the lion ate his wife?
Nothing. He was gladiator.
😂 don’t think you have to worry about competing with Andy - yours was actually funny 😂😂😂
P’rhaps if I took a spare pair of socks with me I might get more holes in one. Maybe that is where I am going wrong! I already carry everything else in my capacious bag so why not spare socks?
Put that face away we know you are not innocent
Have you walked past that gym yet hope it went well and you did not overdo it x
Even I don;t believe that
That pooch is a good excuse for you not going in no wonder you are eager to take them with you
Thought of you when I got my TV guide this week it says next week Steven is going to strike again with Elaine so get your cushion ready you will need it x
Well I have let you know in advanced you see I do think about you x
Thought it was past the gym today x
Two walks in one day your fitness levels will be excellent
How Romantic you are going for a walk with your wife
Looks nice and cool there I bet it is nice having a walk down there when it is really hot x
Yes there is a lot if that now we were looking at a new house and there were all these overgrown trees which needed cutting back I mentioned it and was told they had to be left for the same reason you have just said and no we did not have the house that was one of the main reasons as much as I like wildlife I could not live with a view of overgrown trees
Just been talking about you actually on another post I hope your ears are not burning x
O dear that bad
Did you keep getting pulled by them by the teacher at School do you think that is what has made them that big x
love “broadbottom” 🤭🤭🤭
"Broadbottom" is the sort of name my horrible brother would call me !
Take it you don't like screaming kids then
Few of your jokes and I am sure you could have got them running of your garden x
You have a valid point there
What happened though how come you are still on that level I bet they have moved on x
He's either somewhere in his 2nd childhood or just never grown up, Be-kind. But the good thing is that he's stuck on a fun level 🤪.
Hello
I agree even though maybe the latter might be the right conclusion
But yes at least he has stuck on the fun side and does not even seem to notice when people say his jokes are crap think that is why I am swayed towards the latter in your reply
Hope you are keeping well x
I'm OK Thank You. I'm home from hols and missing the mountain views of Austria. Back to work today, but we had a good laugh in the office so it was a good day.... and there's only one more day to go before the weekend. I hope you are keeping well too & coping OK.
Can imagine they do x
Hahhhaaa 😆😆😆😆😅🤣
I think it's left uncut more for money saving reasons and nothing to do with the wildlife ... but then I'm very cynical! Our 'no mow may, of hedgerows in Surrey has become a "we'll only mow 4 times a year" .... so now you have to know where you are going as you can't read any of the the street signs.
Does doggie go in for a swim in the river?
Hidden did you manage to get that issue resolved with your private chat that was showing you had a notification for a message, when in fact there wasn’t one?
Mine too. Almost been a month since HU started looking into it.
Mmhmm.
I’ve got it too. It says there’s a message but there’s not. I’ve just been ignoring it. 🙂
Morning all ( Sat 10th June)Hope you'll all take extra care this hot & sunny weather, and that all have a lovely day.
Went for my walk this morning down to the butchers and bakers (a slow 2miles there and back), decided to walk back over the common to get some shade, and so glad I did, as got 3/4 of the way home & heard this beauty coming along ....🚂. Wouldv'e missed her if we'd walked via the road.
Hello
I am wondering what you bought at the butchers and especially the bakers
Looks like you had a lovely walk and a bonus as you say getting to see the train
Have a lovely day x
Hi Be-kind,We do have town a shorter walk through traffic in the other direction but it's nice to go where there's only a few shops (& still a typical British High Street) via a lovely walk:
- In the Butchers we got terriki salmon, burgers & chipolatas - as they will all cook quick on the hob. And some chicken for the freezer for later in the week.
It's too hot this weekend to do a roast of his lovely lamb or to get beef to do a stew & make steak & kidney pies too.
- In the little Tesco we just got Salad.
- In the Deli, we got freshly sliced ham, home-made scotch eggs & a small home-made treacle tart to cut-up between us for pudding tonight.
- In the Bakers we just got a large loaf of seeded white bread ( although its hard to decide what to have as he does a large range of artisan brown breads too ). A bacon-cheese pastry for breakfast which is our usual walking day treat, & we grabbed Indian lamb samosas for lunch today too
The bakers bread is lovely & it's very easy to eat too much of it if you don't pay attention! He does a nice light fruit cake some weeks too which cuts up well into very thin slices & lasts all week. . Today we managed to avoid giving in to donuts, iced Belgian buns, bath buns, cinnamon buns, almond croissants, iced fathers day cookies, white chocolate rice krispie cakes, rockie road (a choc biscuit & marshmallow tray bake), chocolate brownies and iced fairy cakes, and fresh cream scones & fresh cream eclairs!
- Didn't go into the little cafe today but sometimes I get a take-away coffee & use the loo.
- DIY shop wasn't open ... he's not quite a proper old hardware shop so I don't think he'd count as the "candle stick maker" although he might still have "fork handles" or "four candles" for sale 😀.
- Then there's a chemist, charity shop and hair dressers, that we didn't visit.
- There's even a funeral directors ...... fortunately not needed today 😀.
Hope you have a lovely day too.
Hello
Thank you for such a detailed reply it made me smile first the sound of that delicious food but did wonder is this healthy eating because if so I can honestly manage that sounds lovely and then the funeral directors I am glad you did not need them today as well
We used to and think as it is years since I got out have a lovely market would sell homemade food as well but as time as gone on and like you say these old fashioned streets have got less and less the market stalls I have been told have to and it is a shame that they are all disappearing
Well you enjoy what you have bought I know I would x
O I have certainly noticed you do x
Years ago my nephew when he was aged around five, called umbrellas "underbrellas" because you stand underneath them, and i've also used that name for the ever since.
Hi AndyDIY shop wasn't open ... he's not quite a proper old hardware shop so I don't think he'd count as the "candle stick maker" although he might still have "fork handles" or "four candles" for sale 😀.
I've been told that the steam train is an old London & North Eastern Region B1 Class called "The Mayflower" , one of only two left of that class / type.
Hope you have a good day.
Wonderful! They are such wonderful places to rummage round in. So much that you never knew you needed or even that it existed.
The type of shop we'd send the newest Junior on site along-to , usually to buy a "long weight for a plum line" , because they were usually the type of shop keeper who (for the pricd of a beer in the pub later on) would actually make the Junior "wait" for a whole hour while prending to look for the weight or to order it, before finally telling them we were all just having a laugh, and then sending them back to site empty handed 🤩.
Andy I need your help
So I looked at Hubby and noticed he had a grey T shirt on and grey jeans
So I thought right this is a joke and I said
You look greyed out today
I got nothing back except a strange look and I thought I had cracked a joke
Where did I go wrong ?
Thought I would ask the expert been you about this x
What someone wearing grey and grey where is the coordination there
See Andy this is what happens if I don't pick out his clothes x
As John Gray the author would say, I am from Venus 🪐
I don’t think you’re from planet Earth, that’s for sure 😂
I’m sure BeKind28- will agree with me too 🤣
Good Morning
Wow you never cease to amaze me how you come up with them everyday and as early as this is mind blowing
See this Sunny Morning has not got in the way of that on another planet brain of yours x
You mean you’ve granted that brain to everyone on this forum 🤣
Yes come on Tos I thought you were intelligant where are you coming from thinking he has a brain x
So what do you have up there instead of a brain?
You said it I just thought it x
Me too now 🤣🙈
O what you like you will be saying we are picking on you next x
Take away that crying face it is not working x
Crying faces? Sulk, sulk, sulk ? Guess like the song says it's time to go & eat worms...Nobody likes meEverybody hates me
Guess I'll go eat worms
Big, fat, juicy ones
Long, thin, slimey ones
Itsy bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms
Down goes the first one
Down goes the second one
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm!
Big, fat, juicy ones
Long, thin, slimey ones
Itsy bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms
Up comes the first one
Up comes the second one
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm!
Big, fat, juicy ones
Long, thin, slimey ones
Itsy bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms
Nobody likes me
Everybody hates me
Guess I'll go eat worms!
❤️
Yep yup what queens English is that suppose to be x
You are not a King sorry to inform you hope you take this news ok more like slang English from Andy's planet X
Andy just wondered is this a picture of you hiding or Sascha I cannot make my mind up x
Thank you for clearing that up for me x
Well it nearly worked x
I am hot Andy and it is affecting my breathing which is causing me panic any advice yes I am desperate asking you but needs must x
Hello
Grandtwins wow 
I would have not made it that far only ran upstairs and backdown and had to sit down 
worried BK x
I have a new one at that x
Hope you are feeling a bit better / cooler now BK
Hello
The last hour we have just had a thunder storm not sure how much it has cooled it down though and earlier my breathing was shocking when it was so hot and humid sent me in a panic attack and to top that I am hoping I am wrong but think I might be getting a water infection which seems a regular occurrence so to be honest I am feeling a little tearful and quite down
How are you ok I hope ?
Thank you so much for asking how I am I really appreciate it I was just feeling so low you could not have timed asking any better x
I’m sorry to hear you might be getting a water infection. They can be horrid. I haven’t had one in over a decade (touch wood) but when I did, I think it was what they call cystitis. My gosh, it was awful!
I hope that’s not the case for you x
Hello
This last couple of years I always seem to be getting them never did when I was younger and the Doctor says this can happen when you are getting older you get them more often I thought charming
But yes they are very painful I agree I don't think unless you have had one or suffer with them you realize just how painful they can be
Glad you don't suffer with them often and hope it stays that way
Hope you have had a nice day x
Well I’m not looking forward to getting older 😂 x
Some may say otherwise but my experience has been there is nothing good about getting older
You know when you were young and older people would say enjoy yourself while you can I now know what they meant x
I feel double my age already, so not sure how I will feel when I’m 60. Probably like a Zombie 🧟♀️ x
try drinking a glass of water with a teaspoon of bicarbonate
Hello
Sent a water sample in so will see what it comes back like just spoken to the Doctor she says if it is positive it will be antibiotics and the ones I have to take make me feel so ill so it won't be positive
I hope you are as ok as you can be x
I think the bicarbonate neutralises it and just stops the burning and drug free it always woks for me x I’m ok thanks
I will ask the Doctor and keep it in mind thank you
Glad you are ok x
BeKind,
I am so sorry you have what may be a urinary tract infection (what we non-medics call cystitis as Tos92 says). Best non-medical advice is to drink loads and loads of water (unless you are on fluid restriction, of course) to flush it out. Some people find cranberry juice helps.
But for me (and it's been often over the years ☹️), the solution has been nitrofurantoin every single time. The urgency stops within an hour, the burning stops within maybe six hours, and the whole, awful thing is gone within a maximum of three days!
I really hope that is not the antibiotic that makes you ill. Hope you feel better soon, whatever they give you. UTIs are horrible.
❤️
Hello
Yes those are the tablets they put me on but they do make me ill even though they do work
I am in agony tonight and could cry it hurts so much but have to wait till tomorrow before I can get the prescription sent to the chemist I have found some I had left over from before but I cannot see the expiry date so I cannot take those
I am drinking loads but have a feeling it is not going to be a good night
Thank you so much for replying to me x
Can someone read the expiry date for you? If you have lost the packet, there should be an expiry date on the edge of the foil strip. As we all know, though, they are practically impossible to see! Oh, I really do feel for you. x
We have took a picture of the strip as the box is missing and blown it up yet where we cut these 6 meds of looks like the expiry date must have been on the other ones I took which was Oct last year but it has got so bad I have took one as I am almost sure as they were prescribed in Oct they must still be in date I have had to risk it which is saying something for me and shows how bad it is now I hope that urgency does go away within an hour because I am never of the toilet and then cannot go
Sorry to anyone reading if to much info
Thank you again Ramilia I appreciate your reply x
What a great idea taking a photo of the foil strip, BK! Sorry it didn't help, though.
As another completely non-medical opinion - and not advice as I am not a doctor - if you have just been prescribed nitrofurantoin, and if your last lot was in October last year, and if it were me with the old ones in my hand until I got the new ones,, I'd do what you have done.
Hello
Well I am anxious over it and so far 2 hours later it does not feel any better but I am sure one till I get the others won't hurt and it is good to know even though I agree we are not telling anyone to do anything here but someone else would do the same
Thank you again and I am just hoping it will ease enough for me to get some sleep it is bad enough with this heat never mind this as well x
Hi Be-KindI Hope that the antibiotics help and that you don't feel too yuck on them.
UTI"s can be so very painful and uncomfortable too & I hope it goes away fast.
Ramila suggested to you about drinking lots of water and trying cranberry juice too. I've had UTI issues since childhood and was always given Roses' lime juice cordial to flush the kidneys out, so that might be worth a try too.
Take care
Hello
I have had a terrible night and feel so ill
The meds they do not suit me but know I have to take them so I am strapping myself in for the next 7 days as I know it will not be pleasant but needs must
Thank you for that tip I will send my Husband to the shop and see if we have any
Do you still suffer now or have things settled down and did you ever find out why you suffered of course you do not have to answer me on this it is just I never did suffer with them till the last couple of years
Thank you so much for replying to me hope you are well x
Good morning BeKind,
I’m sorry it turned out to be a urine infection and now you’re back on antibiotics.
You say they do not suit you, what side effects do they cause for you if you don’t mind me asking?
X
Hello
I have had a dreadful night Tos and of course my anxiety has come out full speed ahead I am not sure how I will cope in this heat and been on them the next 7 days but I know I need to take them
They upset my stomach , they make me feel so tired I drop to sleep all the time , makes me feel generally unwell hard to describe but the worst thing I ever take and I get side effects from other meds but they don't make me feel as ill as these do as well as headaches to
I have told the Doctor before but all they say is these are the ones they have said you need to take no others will work as well so I am stuck with them
Hope you have a lovely day x
Do they know why they are coming back so often? I would’ve thought you may have built a resilience to the side effects as it sounds like you take them more often than you would like.
I hope you can try and enjoy your day too. I have not been sleeping at all in this weather. It’s horrible x
Sorry you are feeling so unwell BeKind, hoping those horrible side effects ease for you soon. 🤞🌷
Hello
Thank You
I hope you are keeping well x
Hello
Thank you for your good wishes. Mobility is a problem at the moment, but I have a GP appointment tomorrow to discuss. So hoping he may be able to help find a solution.
I hope the weather is a bit cooler for you, as it is here. 🌤
Hello
I am sorry to hear that I hope your appointment goes well tomorrow and if you have time let us know how you get on
Slightly cooler but not very much here today just staying inside with fans on x
Thanks.
Yes, it seems a shame when we have to stay indoors with curtains drawn and windows closed, but sometimes it’s the only way. Praying for some more rain. 🌧🌧🌧
Hello
Been agoraphobic that is how I spend my Winters so yes Summer doing the same is really depressing
I agree lets hope it gets slightly cooler x
I have some understanding, having had agoraphobia myself some years ago.😊
Hello
It has been 20 years now for
When we were not allowed out because of the C word and people were not coping I think that is the only time I had an advantage as that is what I do anyway
Sorry to hear you have experienced it but glad you are getting out now x
Twenty years is a long time, very difficult for you.
Thank you BeKind. 😊
x
Well can believe that with what is coming out of them x
I urgently needed a Registration Confirmation Letter from my surgery as proof that I'm registered with a doctor.After hanging on for 38 minutes an irate receptionist finally answered. She had no idea what I was talking about as it was not something she had ever dealt with before.
She said that she would pass it onto my doctor but it would take about 3 weeks as its not an emergency. The cost would be the same as a private consultation fee.
Surely as this is not a medical consultation it should be a free service done by admin not so? Any thoughts on this?
The same cost as having a private consultation, surely not??
Even if there was a fee involved, I don’t think I’ve ever paid more than £40 for a letter from my GP.
Also, if they’re charging that kind of money, why 3 weeks, and not the next day or this week?
Ridiculous.
Was this your GP's surgery?
GPs are a separate independent business from the NHS. They contract their services to the NHS.
The BMA has information.
bma.org.uk/pay-and-contract...
Your GPs surgery should list on their website which services are chargeable and how much they charge.
Eg I was charged £30 for a Fit to Fly letter.
Hello
As the receptionist did not seem to know what she was doing as well as saying she had never come across this before I would guess she did not know how much it would cost either
I would phone back again when you can and query this again
I have to say I am lucky my Doctor writes me letters sends me information I need and never chargers me sometimes I think it can be at their discretion if they charge as well even though most do x
Hello
I think Palpman is looking for the advise I do not have any problems with this one well not as yet I was just suggesting it might be an idea to check with his Surgery again with a receptionist that might know more than the one he got today and how good my GP always is with me when I need anything
Hope you are enjoying the Sunshine and have had a lovely day x
It could be like I say different Doctors can do things at their own discretion if they want to like mine does but most will charge a fee
I was thinking now of asking my Doctor how much she charges but maybe not she might start charging me x
Interesting replies. It is not so much the fees that bothers me but the fact that it is not a health issue but purely admin and should not take long. There are 3 receptionists for one GP plus nurse. One is constantly knitting.
Morning Andy "I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around.”"
When to check in with cardiologist 
6 months in
Tips on self-isolation and social distancing 
6 week check up
Social distancing extension query. 
