Despair

[DavidG1971]

Woke up with that ‘is it a bad dream’ head.

Yesterday got brave and went out for groceries. Partner told me off for taking needless risk.

No sanitizer / it’s beginning to worry me.

Didn’t sleep. Don’t want to complain at home. Partner is pregnant and due June. Bad enough for her - either go to hospital and risk virus or home birth. Don’t want to talk about it with her and stress her. Been so strong until now - but she’s showing signs of stress now.

Head can’t take it today. Not equipped for any of this.

[Milkfairy Heart Star]

Hi DavidG1971

We are living through difficult times.

I would encourage both your partner and yourself to speak to her midwifery team about any anxieties you both may have about the present situation. Talk through with the midwife a sensible stratergy for managing the shopping etc

Women are still attending their antenatal appointments with their midwives. Are you able to go the appointments with her?

You perhaps should sit down with your partner and have strategy about how you are going to manage.

Most women are encouraged to learn breathing exercises and relaxation techniques to help them during the birth process. Hypnobirthing is taught too.

Why not sit down with your partner and practice these together?

There are lots of online resources available as well other meditation techniques available online.

hypnobirthinghub.com/free-r...

insighttimer.com/

We cannot control this situation however we can learn to control how we respond.

Stay safe stay well and stay calm.

[DavidG1971 in reply to Milkfairy]

Thank you. We will - I’m just being a baby about it all. Feels like most of the world is a lot braver than me right now.

[Hidden in reply to DavidG1971]

You’re not being a baby at all. Many of us are hugely anxious and it’s entirely understandable &normal - this is a potential big threat to our wellbeing. Me & spouse are trying not to drive each loopy (anxiety vs complacency !) - not managed it yet !

My counsellor taught me to first try to notice & accept a particular emotion (eg, fear). Then see the emotion as “information” about how my body is reacting to something. Then think about what I can’t control (the virus is in the U.K.) and what I can control (how much I go out, what shopping I can live without). Then make a plan & do some breathing exercises.

You’re not alone, lots of us are scared. That said, my heart condition has taught me that, despite how I might feel inside, strength becomes available somehow, when there is no other choice - and that often “saves” me.

Good luck incl. for you wife & baby.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

PS I’ve never seen anything get worse by talking about it, but I’ve seen the opposite many times - sit down together, talk, & you’ll be able to help each other, even if only to not feel alone.