Looking for info for STI

[Bmurphy12]

Hi, I had a chlamydia test done about a month ago and it came back positive obviously the first thing I thought was my partner must’ve cheated but he said he hadn’t and also did a test, his came back negative. So obviously very confused as neither of us have had sex with anyone else whilst in the relationship. Is it possible for me to get it any other way ?

[Iamthemedicalmystery]

I don't think you can get it another way but its possible you have had it from the very first time / person you had sex with

[Bmurphy12 in reply to Iamthemedicalmystery]

My partner is the first person I had sex with, but I am not the first person he had sex with. He did a test before we met and it was negative. I did speak to a sexual health clinic and they said that the test he took may of been too early and so it might’ve came up negative for that reason and has possibly passed onto me and the infection has cleared out his body by it’s self as they said that can happen with men so that would explain his negative and my positive but he is wanting more proof but I’m not sure that’s possible to get proof

[Iamthemedicalmystery in reply to Bmurphy12]

Unfortunately there is no way of knowing when you got it.

[Bmurphy12 in reply to Iamthemedicalmystery]

yeah I thought so, I don’t know how I’m going to prove it then. But hopefully he can trust my word

[Worriedman]

The important thing is to get it treated any not get stressed about how you got it

[Bmurphy12 in reply to Worriedman]

yeah I’ve been treated and going to be tested again soon to make sure it’s cleared. I’m worried what this means for our relationship though

[Worriedman]

Don’t worry about the past as you can’t change it. Focus on the future. There is a good explanation from the clinic about why his test was negative so just accept it and move on. You both need to build up some trust.

[Bmurphy12 in reply to Worriedman]

yeah got to focus on the future it’s true I can’t change the past. I did ask him if he trusts me and he said it’s not about trust it’s about the facts.

[Worriedman]

Hate to say this but it is about trust. It’s difficult to establish the facts in this case so you both have to trust the other person is telling the truth.

[Bmurphy12]

yeah I think it’s about trust too. There’s no way of finding out how I got it so moving forward has got to involve trust. He did say that if he doesn’t get proof he will end the relationship though.

[xsevenx]

Sounds like a controlling relationship. They never end well in my experience.

[Bmurphy12 in reply to xsevenx]

hi, what makes you feel it is a controlling relationship? Our relationship has never been a controlling one so just wandering what made you think that

[xsevenx in reply to Bmurphy12]

Don’t take this the wrong way. I’m acting with the best of intentions. I know you are in an awful situation. It’s probably best for me to say no more. But perhaps reflect on some of the comments you have shared here. Sorry if I have upset you- that was never my intention.

[Bmurphy12 in reply to xsevenx]

I’ve not taken it the wrong way at all don’t worry. I feel like I know what part you thought was controlling.. the bit where I said he will end the relationship if he doesn’t get proof. I’ll explain what he said, he said that he can’t go on everyday thinking and stressing about the situation so feels he would have to end the relationship. I see with the way I worded it before how you felt that was controlling.

[xsevenx in reply to Bmurphy12]

Ok. Understood.

There is a guy on here called Galen70 . He knows all about STI testing, the limitations and how to interpret results. If he replies to you, I am sure you will be much better informed.

Best wishes.

[Bmurphy12 in reply to xsevenx]

Thankyou! That would be great if he replies.

[xsevenx in reply to Bmurphy12]

Have a look at some of his previous replies on the subject. He is a doctor specialising in Sexual Health.

[Galen70]

Dear B

Sorry that you have found this experience difficult. You will find some similar posts on here before. Can I ask on what situation you had the test done , did you have symptoms? What age are you /your partner ? The clinic should have discussed about the small false positive /negative rates of the test . If you feel your relationship would be at risk of ending because of this possible diagnosis I would contact the health advisor service of your local sexual health department for counselling for you or your partner .

[Bmurphy12 in reply to Galen70]

Hi, yes I had a coil fitted and they asked if I would like a free chlamydia test and I just thought why not no harm in having one done even though I thought it would be positive. I had no symptoms. I’m 20 my partner is 21. We have talked about it and at the moment It seems like we are going to be okay I think my partner was just very stressed about the situation as was I. But just hope we can continue to have trust in eachother so our relationship can work. I’ve had a look at some similar things on chlamydia that you have replied to but I am still a bit confused on how this can happen if neither one of us have been unfaithful. And I took another test after I got the positive result to check it wasn’t false but it also came back positive. Thankyou for replying Galen70

[Bmurphy12 in reply to Galen70]

The clinic said ‘this can happen… well because it has happened now’ but no explanation as to how this could happen. Although me and my partner are okay at the moment I still would like to find out what happened as I’m worried about my health now.

[Galen70 in reply to Bmurphy12]

I am glad you are having long term effective contraception. If you had a second positive test the chance of a false positive is even lower. So as the clinic said he either tested too early after last contact OR his test was false negative

[Galen70 in reply to Galen70]

You should not worry about your health with one uncomplicated case of Chlamydia. You and your partner are in the peak age group for Chlamydia, one in ten have it .

[Galen70 in reply to Galen70]

He could retest. But in any case both of you should take antibiotics and put this behind you . If you both care for each other it's not a blame or infidelity issue and should move on with trust .

[Bmurphy12 in reply to Galen70]

Yeah I think if it’s not affected my health and we both believe and trust eachother the best thing to do is put it behind us. I’ve had antibiotics but he hasn’t as he’s confused as to why he needs it if he was negative but the nurse I spoke to at the clinic said that he could call her so she can explain why.

[Galen70]

That's great I am glad you are both getting help and support from the clinic and can move on from here .