Children removed

[Bluelady-sing]

Has anyone accessing perinatal services has their children removed?

[Ellie_at_APP Partner]

Hi Pumpkins

I know that I have replied on previous posts but I just wanted to emphasise again that it is really rare that a child would be removed from a parent because the parent/s are struggling with their mental health. Of course, I don't know your particular situation (diagnosis, previous history, personal situation etc), and why you are so worried that this may happen.

As I have said in previous posts, the most important thing is that you work with all the professionals who are supporting you, and be really honest about your struggles, how you're feeling etc, so that you're able to get help quickly if you need it. You have probably seen the reply from someone on your other post who recommends really working with services, and that they can sometimes spot when we become unwell before we notice it.

I did have a quick google of statistics of children in care. From a government report in 2015 the amount of children in care in England was 69,540. The biggest proportion of that number (42,710) were in care because of neglect and abuse. Only 2,380 were in care because of parents illness or disability. So you can imagine that that proportion is even lower for those with parents with a mental illness, as 'illness or disability' could include any number of situations / diagnosis etc. Also the report does say that some of the cases of 'care' the placement has been temporary while a parent recovers from an illness etc (e.g. if you have to go to hospital and there is no one to look after the child), so it's not that they have 'removed' the child permanently at all, or stopped the parent seeing the child.

I did want to write those statistics on this site because it is a common fear that if we are struggling with our mental health our children may be taken away from us, but the statistics show that this is actually very rare. If you are given a social worker their role ideally is usually to help you / advocate for you, and to coordinate your support and help you access things you are entitled to.

I hope that this helps to reassure you

Ellie

[amirawilson in reply to Ellie_at_APP]

My grandchildren were taken away from mother by social services and now we cannot find her,,😫😫😫😫, they are in Orange County area , she did not want to be admitted to hospital , she had a pp episode 3 years ago and again after third child, she has 3 children 8,10, and the youngest 9 months, somebody help me I don't know how find her. She thinks the family has done this and now she trusts nobody. I fear for her safety.

[Ellie_at_APP Partner in reply to amirawilson]

Hi amirawilson

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandchildren. That sounds awful. Orange County is in USA isn't it? APP is a UK charity so unfortunately I don't know too much about how the system works in the USA. But I wanted to let you know about a charity that supports families who are suffering from perinatal mental health that is based in the USA.

The charity is Postpartum Support International, their website is postpartum.net/

There is a Postpartum Psychosis Coordinator, on the website it gives her details:

Michele Davidson, PhD, CNM, CFN, RN, provides support and assistance to women and families of women who are experiencing a postpartum psychosis but who do not need emergency support.

703-729-4462 OR 703-298-3247

[e-mail]

I hope they may be able to help you.

I really hope that you can find your daughter,

Take care

Ellie

[jododo]

I had a referral to social services but they backed off as soon as I agreed admission. I haven't seen them since.

There was a lady in mbu with me who was a single mum and had older children. When she first came into hospital they went to her sister but once everyone realised it was going to be more than a few days they went into foster care. They were not removed! It was an agreement with all the extended family involved, and it was temporary. They were wonderfully looked after and the whole family had a lot of support. It wasn't ideal, certainly not what the mum wanted initially, but as she was nearing discharge (I was still a day patient so talked about it) she knew it was the best outcome for a very difficult situation. They saw her regularly and were really excited to "go home" when she was better.

I don't know your situation. It may be your fears are completely unfounded. It may not. But the days of kids being permanently removed because a mum needs help are over

[suzannah0]

No. It is extremely uncommon these days in comparison to thirty years ago (i also work as a health professional so know these statistics). Sometimes while you are in hospital you dont see your children much, mostly because hospitals are too busy, but you do when you get home.