I went throught PPP 1 year and 1 month ago. I remember everything being so beautiful and being so happy, who knew the drastic change my life would take. I remember i was cooking for my husband and suddenly let a tortilla burn. I washed it like if i had never seen something on fire before. Paying close attention to it. I didnt even realise i could of caused a fire in my home. Then my 1 year old at that time was playing pretending she was washing dishes and threw water all over the floor. My husband was really upset but i was really calm and told him, let her its just water anyways. Then things started getting worst. I dont remember exactly everything but only some parts. I took a shower with my daughter that took a long time. I had no countious of time. I remember my husband knocking wondering why i was taking so long. I remember thinking my daughter was an angel and that the restroom was heaven. I also remember i would talk to god and he would answer me. When i got out of the shower i remember telling my husband that i had powers to heal people and that god would talk to me. We are christians and believe in miracles and i guess that is why my husband wasnt that concerned. He didnt believe what i was saying of course but didnt think much of it. We were going to bed. I remember going to the restroom and suddenly the restroom wasnt my restroom it was hell. I was scared. When i got out of the shower i remember carrying my new born and seeing him as a demon. Also my 1 year old being a demon. A horrible creature. I seriously believed i was in hell. That i had died and had gone to hell. I remember telling my husband omg im in hell. He would tell me know your home. With me and the kids. I still believed i was at hell and nothing he told me made me feel better. I just remember him calling my mom this was around 2am and telling her i was acting weird. After that i dont remember much :/. I dont know how many days i was like that. I remember my mom caring for me praying for. All my family members talking to me and telling me to be strong and crying. (My mom told me 3 days passed) My husband had the idea to google my symptoms and read that what i had could be PPP, they decided to take me to the hospital. They send me too NIX in san antonio where i was treated for a week. Then went home but nothing was the same. I couldnt do anything on my own. It took me about 4 months to be able to care for my kids and to things i couldnt. Still with the help of my mom. 1 year and 1 month later here i am feeling great thanks to God, still receiving treatment but im back to my normal self. I put everything in gods hands and i thank him everyday for healing me. I am really scared to get pregnant again.Before PPP i had never had any mental illness nor any of my family members been trhough something similar. I am scared it might happen again.
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