Describe Your Derealization

Can somebody please describe to me what your Derealization symptoms feel like? I want to know for sure if this is what I have been experiencing. Can you feel it before it come on? I just got a weird tingly almost numb sensation run across my chest then looking around looks weird feel a bit strange. Thanks

[HopingCat]

Well for me it started off by this sick fear in my stomach and this weird buzzing sensation in my brain. Then all of a sudden my vision zooms and everything/everyone around me feels and looks fake. Like if I entered the twilight zone. Then I feel like my soul is leaving my body and I’m looking at myself from up top. After this attack happened my life went down hill. All of a sudden everything around me felt unfamiliar. The people/ surroundings just looked like I was in a dream when I know damn well I am not. Then the existence thought came. Obsessing about humanity and individuality. Life and how did we get here and how am I me. Really weird stuff. I even started thinking I was dead or in a coma. I then, for the first time in my life, entered depression. This hell gave me depression. I felt hopeless, cried all day because I felt horrific. The feeling of reality was almost unbearable. I felt like my brain was wrapped in cotton. Like I was in a bubble that needed to be popped. I became hyper aware to self. Like me being a human or existing freaked me out and trigger those weird attacks. Anyways, I can go on and on because I seriously think I had all the symptoms in the book. Oh and then there’s the part of feeling disconnected from myself and not recognizing myself in the mirror. this all started for me 9 months ago. And I am almost afraid to write (because I don’t want to jinx myself) that half of those symptoms are gone and medication has helped. Even if it took me a while to finally get on meds ( I was refusing it and being a baby about it) I am not recovered and this condition is like a roller coaster. Up and down up and down. I had ok days and there’s days I feel hopeless and I feel like I am back to square one but then I try to tell myself that I have come along way since this all started for me back in Feb. This also came with intense vision. I feel like things are coming at me too clear. I then start thinking I’m in a dream and I get an attack. The lights at the store (florescent lights) and the lights at home (dim yellow) trigger attacks. Makes me feel like I am outside my body looking at myself from the back. I had to train my brain again to what’s “normal” and it’s been a very hard journey. Especially when I don’t know where this come from. I didn’t have any anxiety disorder or anything before this so it’s confused but all I can do is try anything possible to get better. So yea.... that’s about it

[Hidden in reply to HopingCat]

Hey HopingCat,

Thank you SO much for your reply 😊

I go through the exact same thing you have described to me. I’m so glad I’ve finally found someone who goes through the same personal hell that I do so I have someone I can relate to.

I’m so sorry you have to endure this on a daily basis I have been going in and out of these states too. I question life and our bodies/brains and I wonder how our brains can work constantly and make us have the ability to move and speak it’s scary to think about it all. Nobody else seems to think this way but since I’ve been getting Derealization I’ve been experiencing this too. The existential questions about everything. I feel like my surroundings look fake a lot too or I don’t know what I’m supposed to do to interact with them or how I’m supposed to feel about the things around me. It’s hard to explain to other people who just don’t understand they just tell me I’m fine and it’s just my anxiety but it’s so tough. I go into these phases where I’m almost scared of my surroundings just regular things. I often feel like there’s a blanket or a veil wrapped or draped over my brain. I get every physical symptom in the book especially head and chest pains for some reason. I feel nauseous a lot find it hard to take a full deep breath muscle pains randomly. All of this started for me when I was on then went off Zoloft cause I had the WORST reaction ever to it. I’d never go on pills again because of this experience it traumatized me for sure. I feel like what you said too I feel like I have to go back and relearn the basics of everything now to feel normal again 😔