Panic attack at church

[Elizabeth04]

Was at church and totally went into fight or flight mode... feeling like I was gonna die. All of that panic nonsense.

Anyways now I'm home. Feeling super depressed. My 2 year old is being a typical 2year old...he is very very whiny. It's really like one step forward and two steps back for me. I get so excited to feel a change and to go out and excersise... to change my life. But it's like the panic... the anxiety... the depressive days just knock me down.

I really wish that a anti depressants could work for me. I went to my medicine closet and looked... I have 5 different SSRIs in there I barely gave a chance.

I'm thinking of trying one again... like really trying. Not just taking it for 2 days and getting scared.

I look in the mirror.. I look at pictures of me from a year ago. Man I have changed.

I look so worn out... so drained, pale and tired. I definitely look how I feel. Thank goodness for make up.

I'm thankful for this forum... I know I can always come here and at least someone will listen

Props to my husband too, he has been very supportive.

[Janco]

There is hope!

Anxiety is a liar. Never give up.

Keep on breathing, write down every time you "win" anxiety by getting through the day.

[kevoreally]

I get this EVERYTIME im in ANY CHURCH makes me feel anxiety is of the EVIL lmaoooo i always thought I was just crazy or something has posessed me cause I always watch quiji board videos and paranoraml crap lol

[Agora1 in reply to kevoreally]

Now kev, I do believe that the Ouija Board can conger up some bad spirits. And I do believe in paranormal activity. Not the ones made for the movies but real life cases that I've known about. That too can be a topic of it's own. Is the person's mind so powerful to feel the presence of others? There's still a lot of research being done on that mostly because of the scams that are present to make money.

As for feeling anxious in church? It's more about anxiety in a large space with a lot of people and lights. Not because of an Evil presence. You could feel that way in any large capacity building or room. It is too open, anxiety goes into an agoraphobic phase.

[Agora1]

Elizabeth04, I was were you were. Couldn't go to church even though I'd sit in the last pew and at the end, I became overwhelmed with the spaciousness, the people the music the lighting the smell of candles. Anything and everything put me in anxiety mode. From there I started going to the small chapel in the hospital. The ER was directly above the chapel. Thought that might give me the confidence and security I needed.

The room was more contained and lit dimly which helped some. And yet fear and panic would take over not as bad as with the big church but enough to make me very uncomfortable.

I realized that it was no different than going to the store and feeling overwhelmed. Standing in a line and feeling the floor moving. Where ever I went it was there with me because you can't run away from your mind. That is when I started looking into meditation and deep breathing. Whenever I felt anxiety coming on, I immediately turn to slowly deep breathing. Practicing it everyday made it easier to be my "go to" when I needed it. It came naturally and easily as if I was programmed. The slow deep breathes reduce heart flutters, dizziness, panic and butterflies. It allows you to accept the fact that you are safe, you are okay because you are in control.

I will say this, you are very fortunate in having your husband support you. Not feeling alienated by those around you is a bonus. xx