Hi I lost my son about a year ago now he died in his sleep he was 21 I am so depressed I have no where to turn to I have no family

[Dani45]

Just need some hope

[Stilltrying_]

Dani this sounds so tragic. I don't know the circumstances of the death or whether he was ill and it was sort of expected but to lose a child is a most terrible thing. I have never experienced anything like this and don't have children but I can only imagine how you must feel after such an experience.

Did you get any help for this at the time ? Did you go for any grief counselling at all?

It sounds like you are quite low at the moment and I wonder whether it is coming up to the anniversary as that is always going to be a very tough day for you.

I am sorry you are alone but you will find people on here ready to listen and everyone helps each other on here. So please feel free to say more about yourself and express your feelings as that is what we are here for. As for hope it is difficult to feel when one has had such a tragic loss but it is there and will come to you in time

Gemmalouise X

[hamble99b]

dear Dani, my heart truly goes out to you, to lose your son is so tragic and I cannot begin to imagine the pain you are feeling.

gemmalouise has said a lot of what I wanted to say,

I don't know what to say, because there probably isn't a lot that I could that would help you, but I am so sorry.

would it help to talk to the samaritans? they are there for everyone, they listen, they are a human voice at the end of the phone. If you don't feel the one you talk to is helping, you can ring & talk to another. the number is 0845 790 9090

(or to a cruise bereavement team. cruse.org.uk/in-your-area)

You've took a huge step forward in coming and sharing on here, and are no longer alone. we might not have the answers to help you, but we will try. the people on here are all friendly and helpful, and we all come on at different hours, days; you can talk to us.

If it's too painful, ignore the next bit but, I wonder if you want to tell

us (or pm me) a little about him, his name, what he liked to do, funny things he did or said. but only if you want to - never feel pushed into doing anything. including those who try to tell you how to grieve.

thankyou for talking to us, please let us know how you are.

I'm normally on about this time but I'll check in late tomorrow night.

regards,

hamble.

[hamble99b]

have you been on today Dani? you are in my thoughts.

[Hidden]

Hi Dani

I cannot even imagine how you are feeling & my heart goes out to you

People are here to listen so please come back & let us know how you are

Take Care

Love

whywhy

xxx

[loopsyloo]

Dani am so sorry for your loss can't even imagin how you must feel. Have you tried going to a grief councillor or even a support group . It may help to talk to people who can relate to how you are feeling ... but we are always hear if u need us xxxx

[Survivorthriver]

Hi Dani, Sorry that I'm just seeing your post as I'm not really good about being online often. There are some really caring and thoughtful people on this blog. I lost my son when he was 16. It can be a lonesome place in life when our babies are no longer here with us to see them continue their lives. I can relate to all the heartaches and pain that comes along with this tragedy. As Gemmalouise mentioned, being around others who have experienced the same or very similar tragedies may help to get through the darkest moments. There is nothing that I can say to make you feel better; however, to know that there are other people like me who are feeling your pain too as we deal with the same hurt of not having our loved one here. We understand that there can be many triggers: a birthday, anniversary of his death, his favorite moment, his friends may visit you, a change in the season, almost anything could remind you of his life. You will always remember your son and he will always be part of your life. Please find a support system if you have not already. Mother's Day just passed so I don't know what that was like for you. Some of us deal with grief similar and others very different. Keep pushing through life and you will find that one day you will have more good days than bad days. But, your son will still be with you in your heart and spirit. It took me 4 years to be able to smile about the good times because I could not see beyond missing my son. He was my only son and an adorable human being with a promising future. For myself although I was angry with the world and God, I continued to pray anyway because I knew it was my emotions acting out all over the place. With prayer and time my emotions eventually fell back in place. My thoughts became clearer. Now, even in the midst of my love for my son, I extend a helping hand to others to support them through the loss of their children. Now that it has been 3 days, you may have found the strength to push through. You will be okay. You are living for a purpose.

[hamble99b in reply to Survivorthriver]

thankyou for sharing Survivorthriver, I do hope that Dani reads it. I am so sorry that you lost your son.

he would, I'm sure, be so proud of you.

regards,

hamble.

[RcsRdsrightarm]

I lost my oldest son January 15, 2013. I wake up everyday in pain and feeling angry due to the non action taken by state of Texas. Grieving is hard and it really takes time. I had to change careersand basically start over in my life. Call a crises hotline for a referral. Hope this helps. Stay thinking forward you cannot go back and change the event that caused your sorrow. Lost is the feeling I feel most. That first born child is the first time we actually feel unconditional love.