hi it’s been awhile

[Screambaby]

Hi guys I know it’s been awhile since I’ve posted, but I just wanted to come on here & just tell you guys what’s been happening over here on my end. I got into makeup school which is so far so good & my fiancé’s grandparents found out about us being engaged which they are happy about. But lately I’ve been feeling kinda depressed because my daughter is with her dad currently since it’s his time & we both co-parent with her. I’m feeling depressed because I feel like he’s not letting me have more time with her & he’s being quite selfish about it. As parents we are suppose to be communicating with other to make things work smoothly for our daughter, but it’s like lately he hasn’t really let me talk to her more on the phone & i feel uncomfortable at times because he would be kind of listening or watching us talk on FaceTime. It’s like I could never have any time with her. It’s not like I have nothing to hide or anything, but it just makes me feel like he doesn’t want me to talk to her or something. It’s strange when my fiancé is around her dad doesn’t say or isn’t around when we talk, but as soon as he knows I’m alone he treats me so differently. I try so hard to be the bigger person & try to communicate with him, but he’s just so two faced. You see her dad only ever acts like a dad when he knows that theres other people around & wants to be suddenly mister dad. The thing is though my daughter has told me that her dad lets her mostly spend time with her grandma (his mom) while he does his thing which is playing video games, playing dnd, always on his phone & go be with his gf along with her own child. I just think he just only puts a face on when he needs to be & it’s unfortunate for my daughter because she’s only 7 & she’s noticing it. My fear is that I don’t want history to repeats itself because i grew up with my dad in and out of my life. The last thing I want for my child is to not feel like she’s not being put as a priority & that’s why whenever me & her talk I always ask her if there’s anything in her mind and if so how can I help. Luckily my fiancé adores her so much as his own so that kind of gives me hope for her to have a father figure in her life. I just wish he would realize how special she really is and how much she deserves me to be her mom that needs me to be. I do miss her so much & another fear of mine is not seeing her for my birthday which is coming up on the 23rd. He’s done it before & he made her almost forget about calling me on my birthday because at the time I had covid so I couldn’t even see her for my birthday for that & I just remember crying until I had to ask one of my cousins to use her phone since her dad didn’t have her number & when I finally got to talk to her it made me happy until he wanted her off the phone so I didn’t get more than 2 minutes to talk to my daughter. I just remember being so emotional for my birthday & went to bed crying. I just hope he doesn’t do it this time because that would break my heart.

[012703060610]

I am so sorry. I am right there with an awful coparent. We just switched summer custody as we do half each and I was reunited with my three little ones this week. Co parenting needs to be approached with the child in the center. My ex keeps them from me, tells them to lie to me, lets them go days with no showers or baths, has them sleeping between his house, his parents and his girlfriend's house. They are constantly sleep deprived. I just want you to know I relate and fully understand how hard it is. My kids are 11, 10 and 6. Seven is a great age and your fears are probably legitimate. Studies time and again show both parents involved is key and consistency in co parenting is important. Seems like we both have our battles. Oh and I am always monitored when I face time. We don't do that to him but may start now! It's so unsettling to not be able to talk to your kid because someone is there trying to get you to mess up! My kids see the issues. My oldest loves him because he has no rules. My younger two do not like his inconsistency....it really impacts there mood!

[Screambaby in reply to 012703060610]

I’m so happy to know I’m not alone in this & im so sorry for what you are going through. I have only 1 child I can’t imagine 3 but I bet it just shows how much stronger you are to take that role. Hopefully soon I have more & I just think us moms need to support & stick together for our children. Thank you & just know I’m here for you as well. After all we are both mommies & it’s nice to have someone to relate to.

[012703060610 in reply to Screambaby]

It certainly is! Let's try to keep our sanity together!