Inspired

[gerrerd]

Be inspired to change you.

[Dolphin14]

I'm looking at number 2. That's a multi layered goal. It shouldn't matter to us what others think. It's not about us. This concept was very difficult for me to wrap my head around.

❤️🐬

[Roxylox in reply to Dolphin14]

Questions in this post primarily meant for Gerrard

That's the one I can't fathom either . Surely it matters when they spread their false bad opinion around, and lots of people think one is a really weird and terrible person. How can a person have peace of mind when lots of people treat them as a pariah.

It would not matter if only one or two people had an awful view of me.

I have plenty of self-belief, but am still very bothered, offended and embittered by the fact that I am so poorly thought of.

It is no consolation when I am told their opinion is not about me. It becomes very much about me when that poor judgment of me is widely believed and I am treated poorly - even in shops.

Did you manage to accept statement 2 eventually Dolphin, and how?

[Dolphin14 in reply to Roxylox]

I agree with you 100%. My thought is depending on how deep the wound is this could take years and years to accept, if at all. Another issue is what type of disapproval? Why does anyone have the right to judge us? Maybe we can move on but accepting is a different story.

As far as my situation goes it has taken years to uncover the root of my problem. So, low self esteem, low self worth etc played a huge role in how I responded to people's negativity and hurtful words and actions.

A part of me is still very sensitive to this. It depends on who causes the hurt and what memories it triggers. If it hits deeply I'm going to be bothered by it. That's who I am.

I've spent many years meditating and in therapy. I've made progress by looking deep inside myself and knowing who I am. Getting here was about learning to shut off old memories and messages.

In all honesty, for me, I will never reach number 2. I'm too emotionally sensitive. I won't stop trying but some things placed on lists like this have to be taken with a grain of salt. Those are goals.... we may not all achieve each goal.

I'm sorry you deal with this also. Just remember you are worthy of a peaceful and happy life, we all are.

❤️🐬

[Roxylox in reply to Dolphin14]

Thank you for your very detailed reply. Unfortunately I seem to. invite disapproval on a couple of issues.

I find it quite stunning that even the people who would know I have been in hospital for mental health issues in the past lack compassion.

Like many of us here find I think, the very fact thay we have mental health issues causes people to doubt our judgment.

I will tell you about the worst judgment in a PM If that's ok. Plese tell me if it's not

[Dolphin14 in reply to Roxylox]

Yes, a pm is ok.

❤️🐬

[gerrerd in reply to Roxylox]

The only opinion that matters is yours, you can only control your thoughts about yourself ! love yourself! Why worry what fools believe or say. be independent of the good or bad opinions of others !

[Roxylox in reply to gerrerd]

I'm trying

[gerrerd in reply to Dolphin14]

Its their illusion it belongs to them, its a reflection of them not us ! ❤️❤️

[Dolphin14 in reply to gerrerd]

Agree... it takes time to have that sink in. Then I have to lose the emotional messages that come with. Even if I can see this 50% of the time it's better than not seeing it at all

❤️🐬

[gerrerd in reply to Dolphin14]

It takes time and daily work, but once it sink in your free ❤️❤️